Jaden Smith is only 14-years-old, but he’s retarded rich and best friends with Justin Bieber making him the perfect candidate for Kris Jenner to pimp Kylie out to insure the future of the Kardashian brand. “How’s his bladder?” she probably asked Jada Pinkett-Smith, “From a mother to a mother.” But before everyone gets all freaked out, don’t worry, Will Smith chaperoned their date Saturday night so everything was on the up-and-up. “Listen, Kylie, I’m sure you’re nervous and all dating my son, but I won’t you to know that his mother and I draw the line at him letting him dress like a shithead and buying young girls like property. Little man’s going to be a perfect gentleman tonight, and I’ll be here most of the time to make sure that happens. But when I’m not here, you two sit your asses down and don’t go anywhere near that men’s room, or I swear to God, Jaden, no leg bandanas for a month. Don’t go messing with me, son.”
Photos: Splash News
Ah, life lessons from dad Will Smith…how to act mostly white but still have access to big butts.
His boyfriend’s ass isn’t THAT big.
i can only imagine the reaction that must be happening to KarTRASHidan fans down in the deep south….get a rope!!
Serious question: Wouldn’t that kind of potential fan already hate the Kardashians for being dirty, swarthy immigrant types?
Not even through puberty, and he already has a beard.
In every one of these pictures there’s a floating head with duct tape on its eyebrow…
And three bodyguards. Jesus.
Sick of seeing this Smith brat shoved down everyone’s throats. No talent but total arrogance just like mom and pop.
has kris jenner hired OJ to kill all the other women in hollywood? there must just be a mass grave in an abandoned lot somewhere in south central.
Why the fuck is he dressed like Robin Hood?
Fuck off, Oreo.
One will note that there isn’t a single picture in this lot where Kylie and Jaden are even looking at each other. Kylie looks like she’d rather be watching paint dry.
Really, I’m torn… I don’t know which one I should be feeling more sorry for.
I feel for Kylie. It’s got to be terrifying knowing that your peed on face is what mom is hoping will revitalize the K-Klan empire.
Kris: “I don’t CARE if you don’t like him. He’s rich, he’s black, he’s your new boyfriend.”
You shouldn’t be feeling sorry for them, but for the rest of us, who will have to endure this fake bullshit relationship in unrelenting media cycles for the next six months.
“Son, you can have oral sex for two minutes, then I’m driving you home! It’s not like you’re gonna last that long anyway!”
“DAD!”
“Well you aren’t!”
His dad WOULD know, based on personal experience.
so, fingers crossed…I’m hoping her DVD will feature her being shatted on instead of peed on like her big sis.
Sequels always have to go bigger.
She’s starting to lookie like big sis Chewy
“…and then I beat Super Mario Bros with one life! Oh hey, did I tell you I was in Karate Kid?”
Wanna bet that guy didn’t give 1 fuck about Will Smith’s hand? Stupid effing elitist douchery. How’s that cheating wife of your’s doing Mr Closet Bi-Sexual.
Will smith is a retard?
The way these faux-celebrity relationships are going we’re only a couple years away from Wal-Mart fucking MTV and birthing some strand of Cthulhu-herpes that swallows the Earth whole.
You don’t wanna see my hand where yo tit be at.
Don’t rich kids usually own more than one shirt?
He and the other useless twats in his crew are trying to start some shitty clothing company with those ghetto swapmeet clothing and uninspired cheap logo. That is why he is always wearing those shitty clothes.
I’m not sure what it is – I do not know these two, don’t know what they do and have never even heard them speak yet I despise them. I think it is extreme foresight that giving me the ability to beat the rush and hate them now.
I hate this guy. Someone needs to lay a serious beating on him just because of that annoying stare and because he was born into a rich annoying family
Kudos to Jaden Smith for accomplishing the near-impossible – producing a look of shame on a Kardashian.
Worst case of JPFS (Juvenile Punchable Face Syndrome) I’ve ever seen. Note the agony of self-restraint playing across the faces of the nearby men, each fighting a desperate urge to smack this kid upside the head. Only Kylie Jenner, who from dealing with family members knows the best strategy is to just look at the ground, escapes the frustration.
You have to love the Kardashians, the only black people they have around is the rich black dumbass men that they use for their money. Other than that they have zero to do with any other black people.
i hope will smith is smart enough not to get tangled up in the Kardashian trap
Ooooh gawd. Why do I get the idea there is a “Terminator” style menu of moment-by-moment options being displayed on her retinal interface?
Poor little Kylie didn’t have a chance to even TRY to date a white guy
Frosted tips make him look like a cheap paint brush.
I won’t you to know
at him letting him dress
I hate myself for not letting it go