Kristen Bell in a bikini

June 19th, 2009 // 76 Comments

Here’s Kristen Bell vacationing in Hawaii with Dax Sheppard who I basically cropped out of every single shot. Now, I know what you’re thinking: Does Jesus write this blog? And the answer is, no, he doesn’t. I’m just his son who moonlights as a sexual ninja. No, really, ask my exes. They never knew if I was making love to them or already across the room to cry in the shower. I’m that good.

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. WoW, what a woman. Nice to see her in that blue “dress” very attractive. thx for the pics.

    Regards Handy Andy

  2. Jason

    Titless freak, she looks like shit here. I never understood her hype, i think she is average at best and get a tan you pasty bitch. Gross… this is just NOT hot.

  3. LOL

    FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT!

    WHEN DID SHE GROW A PAIR OF BRITNEY SPEARS STUMPY CHEETOS LEGS? UGH

  4. Lippen Whiskey

    She’s a babe and those are some of the stoutest boobies you’ll ever see. Nice figure. On the minimal side, her taste in bikinis as to their color (not style) is not great.

  5. xavier1987

    Great !! I want to find a such wife… Are you? Feel free to view my photos @ “M y I n t e r r a c i a l M a t c h. c Om ” where you can find me and many handsome black and white men .

  6. Delgo

    Namor, the Sub Mariner

  7. CakeSnifferer

    WTF is a Dax Shepphard? Some kind of new breed?

  8. CakeSnifferer

    I’m just kidding, I would say that an ugly mutt like him gives all of us regular schmucks hope, but she’s not looking too special here.

  9. Master

    She is thin but she doesn’t know the gym

  10. spudsbuckley

    I’m sorry folks but you’re terminally gay if you find Kristen unattractive.

  11. Mama Pinkus

    her body is fine but her eyes creep me out – something is just not right with them

  12. whomever

    She was really hot in Sarah Marshall but she looks fat to me in these.

  13. vito

    Hey @24, 25, 26…

    The thing that absolutely bothers ME is that you don’t have the brains to click on the mother-fucking “Post Your Comment” button only the one time that is required!

    And what the fuck do you know abour her eyes? Are you her makeup artist or something? Maybe you would be happy if she were to have her eye sockets spread apart thru some magical surgical procedure or some such shit.

    She’s a cute woman, so shut the fuck up already. Ignorant fucking cretin!

  14. not blind

    FUGLY, PASTY, TREE STUMP LEGS

  15. Straight Guy

    To all those ‘She’s too fat” and “I wouldn’t do her” bullshit artists…
    are you only attracted to stick-thin chicks who look like 14 year old boys?

    This is what years of jacking off to MAXIM does to you.

  16. James

    Dax Sheppard is having sex with Kristen Bell and Jamie Kennedy is having sex with Jennifer Love Hewitt. The world has gone mad.

  17. Name

    Kristen Bell is popular because she looks attainable. It is easier for guys to imagine being with her than a genuinely beautiful woman. That is also why she does not incite jealousy from girls like other women.

  18. Jason44

    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    She is my sweetheart…..She is the sunshine in my heart…..She is my best match…..I knew I would not love any other woman since I met her…Thanks for ************Cougar Circle . com*********** which brought us happiness. Wish you are as lucky as me……
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

  19. Those glasses look bad, but nice body!

  20. Fat! But I’d screw her like I was on fire. So pasty….

  21. Kristen Bell Kristen Bell Kristen Bell. How does she stay that pale in the sun? It’s MAGIC.

    She seems pleasant, too:
    http://thesuperficial.com/2008/05/bfm_enlarged/enlarged-kristen_bell_must_work_out.php?bfm_index=5&bfm_page=0

    @ 24, 61 – That’s GOOOOD cockeyed. Like Dixie Chicks cockeyed, or some of those Victorias Secret models. Better than Karen Black.

  22. Water seems to be pretty cold :)

  23. Cold as ice :)

  24. mark
    Commented on this photo:

    Very nice!

  25. Fuck You

    Wow, wtf is everyone so jealous of Kristen Bell? She is beautiful and talented. Hating on her isn’t going to change anything so just fucking stop.

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