“Man, I’m tryin’ to smoke in here with, like, these bags, man…”
Kristen Stewart got in an accident in Hollywood yesterday, and while other sources will try to say she was driving, I’m going to arrange our photos so it looks like she was having a mid-day clam bake in the trunk when a woman hit her parked car because they’re goddamn murderers behind the wheel. It’s the responsible thing to do.
Adding… Apparently mini Coopers stop working and require a tow after the slightest of bumps, but they do hold a ton of bags full of Robert Pattinson’s clothes, unwashed just how he likes ‘em. Make of that what you will.
Photo: Pacific Coast News
‘Apparently mini Coopers stop working and require a tow’
They are shitboxes…with every purchase you get 5 free tow coupons. Almost a month’s supply.
If it were a Pinto she’d be dead.
Actually if you look at the photo closely the passenger side rear tail light is busted so thats why the car required a tow. I own a 2010 Cooper S and frankly its been a wondeeful car.. They can all have issues.
What wait what? Light…tow…light…tow… *scratches head* light…pedal…engine…light…tow? Fuck it, guess I missed that movie.
Just wanted to post the first of many “I wouldn’t mind rear-ending Kristin Stewart!” comments. Score!!
i would totally fuck the boredom out of her
if she sit on my face will i be bored?
Since I’m pretty sure her vag is also set on “permanent scowl” it’s up to you whether the novelty of that will offset the boredom factor.
for a chick with few curves she looks might fine in jeans. why she driving a mini tho, weren’t those cars for like 16yo’s who wanted to learn small engines? not even sure it’s a step up from the robin (reliant)
at least her perma-frown is appropriate for once.
awesome!! :D
nice ass?
She first needs one for it to be nice
a nice ass doesn’t need to be huge.
I’d rear-end that!
i would feast on that keester.
whoa that ladies pants desperately want to be camel toes upon
Might want to uh, blur that license plate out. Just sayin’.
Shoot, I’d rear end her too, lookin’ all fine and bitchy witchoself.
She’s got such a tight little body, I just want to bounce her up and down on my lap like a dirty Santa.
Due to this woman’s negligence, KS missed her 2 hour schedule showering…
For her sake…..blur the plate man…..
I title this image:
4-Seconds-Away-From-An-Invitation.
Everything is so goddamned perky on her. Her face may be cranky, but they can’t keep her ass from winking and giggling at me.
too easy
I think the car getting towed was possibly the most ridiculous thing out of this story.
“Awww, you mean your charming personality couldn’t score you a decent bed at R Patt’s place? That’s so sad.”
oh how it beacons..
this girl is SO god damn HOT. Fuck the fat bitches that hate on my Kristen. come to PAPA baby, and let me buy you a REAL friggin’ car. please!
I like her bitchface, I just want to bend her over and wipe that smirk right off her.
Poor Kristen, it looks very cramped in that Transformer’s asshole.
smokin’ hawt!…and no jokes about being rear-ended are needed! Kristen blows smoke!
Blur that sh*t man!
again, another Daily Mail article.
If you have the wit to make up your own smartass comments, there’s really no reason to even visit this site…just go to
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2015011/Kristen-Stewarts-Mini-towed-minor-fender-bender-Hollywood.html
That article was boring as fuck. Not funny at all. This site is at least entertaining.
Why do you waste your time on here commenting that people should be reading the Daily Mail?
Unlike you, Fish only PRETENDS to live in his Mom’s basement.
Get a life, troll…
homelss due to the financial crises, folks!!
nice view
The jeans lie!
There is hardly any junk in that trunk.
there’s junk in that mini-truck. She bared a georgia peached ass in her stripper movie.
aww this story sucks. I thought rear ending a girl meant something different.
The matte black Mini actually gives me a bit more respect for her.
DOH!! Someone’s getting in trouble for not blurring that plate!
what the h,… did she think it could explode or something? The damage can barley be seen, wtf
narf!
Why the fuck do I gotta keep re-clicking those arrows?
What the fuck is with all of these comments about her having a nice ass? She has the ass of a 12 year old boy. Apparently this site is over-run with British people who have a skewed perspective of what a nice ass is.
Or pedophiles ;D
Let me guess you like Kim K’s double ham hocks instead?
double ham hocks lmao
She does realize she’s only supposed to play a vampire in the movies, right?
tasty little tenderloin
Has the “I’d like to rear-end her too..” comment been made already? I was too impatient to read first this time.
Yep, 2nd comment.
Looks like she changed plates recently. And now because of this post she will have to again.
It’s barely got a scratch and she towing it? I’m rolled car and driven away from the scene (vodka bottle still in hand)
This crack whore like getting rear ended.
Too bad she is an overpaid actress. Getting hit by a Jag would be a ka-ching moment for a lot people.
Looks like a custom matte paint job. My guess is the car is being sent over to that shop, and she doesn’t have time/feel like bringing it over herself. She’s got enough money to have it sent there, and go drive another of her cars. I’d do the same.
That dude is trying like crazy to get a look at the crack of her ass. I would too!
She seems so normal. I really like her!
Why did this require a tow? Did she go to the hospital in a neckbrace, too?
She looks good in these pics. I don’t know why everyone says she’s so average and ugly. She definitely has a nice body and she looks in shape.
it’s been a long time since i’ve since someone “roll up” their skinny jeans…is this 1989?
i’m rolling up my jeans right now…yeah i’m cool like the white twilight girl!