Kris Humphries Sued For Allegedly Giving A Woman Herpes, Woman Sadly Not Kim Kardashian

A year before agreeing to be Kim Kardashian’s fake husband, Kris Humphries allegedly had unprotected sex with a woman who claims he gave her herpes and is now suing him for it because apparently you can do that now. Anyone know what the payout is for the clap? No reason. RadarOnline reports:

“Once Kayla Goldberg and Kris Humphries arrived at his hotel room they had sexual intercourse more than once, becoming intimate partners,” the court documents assert. “During their interactions Humphries also performed oral sex on Goldberg….Defendant Humphries did not at any time inform Plaintiff that he was infected with the incurable venereal disease, Herpes Simplex Virus.”
Goldberg claims she was “free of any venereal diseases at the time she commenced her intimate relationship with Kris Humphries…Goldberg developed symptoms of herpes about or around four to five days after the first sexual encounter with Humphries. These symptoms included sore throat, fever, body aches and immobilizing pain, extreme pain, extreme vaginal irritation and painful lesions on her genitalia. A doctor officially diagnosed Goldberg with Herpes on September 8, 2010, through an examination and swab test.”

I really hope this is true and here’s why: If Kim Kardashian doesn’t have herpes, that means she never had sex with Kris Humphries which proves their marriage was never consummated and a fraud thus nullifying their pre-nup and he gets a ton of her money. But if she does have herpes, then there is God and he’s really not that big of a dick after all. “Don’t worry about the whole Mila and Ashton thing. She just has a brain tumor, it’ll work itself out. Now watch me make another celebrities’ butt pop out. SHOCK-A-BOOEY!

Photos: Splash News