There’s Probably A Kourtney Kardashian Sex Tape

Dear God, please be recent…

Apparently before he started dating Kourtney Kardashian, Patrick Bateman’s little brother Scott Disick and his buddies used to get chicks high and/or drunk off their ass, then film each other having sex with them for sport and/or to look at each others wieners. It’s a story rife with subtext. Life & Style reports:

Flashing strangers, skinny-dipping in pools, getting intimate with blondes in hot tubs and even engaging in orgies with his buddies, Scott was known as the exhibitionist of the rowdy posse. “We’d bring back different groups of girls to one of our houses and do various things to them,” admits Donald, who alleges that while protection wasn’t always used, alcohol and marijuana sometimes were — and could have clouded the judgment of the females on the tapes.
“We tried to make it a daily routine, and some nights would be taped. There’s probably a good eight or nine tapes.”
“We thought, If we start videotaping ourselves, maybe one day we can make a TV show out of it,” he tells Life & Style. “Now Scott’s on a reality show. He was always trying to make it to the top. “

KRIS: Hi, Kris Jenner. Nice to meet you.
SCOTT: Scott Disick. The pleasure’s mine.
KRIS: Scott, I’ll cut to the chase. I hear you like to make sex tapes.
SCOTT: I do.
KRIS: How’d you like to come over for dinner and meet my daughter?
SCOTT: That’d be great, Mrs. Jenner, except you’re already on top of my penis making me ejaculate into you without a condom on.
KRIS: Oh, please, don’t worry about that. I’ll just tell my husband the baby his. So dinner at 6?

And that’s the story of how Kylie was born. The End.

Photos: Fame/Flynet, Splash News, WENN