Kourtney Kardashian Is Getting Married Now. Awesome.

December 1st, 2011 // 45 Comments
Kourtney's Pregnant
Kourtney Kardashian Pregnant
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So remember how Kim Kardashian got married then immediately divorced in a massive all-consuming shitstorm of media whore-grabbery that somehow didn’t torpedo the entire Kardashian brand despite being an absolute, blatant scam? Well, Kris Jenner would like it if you forgot all that and focused instead on Kourtney Kardashian and Scott Disick getting married on top of conveniently shitting out a second kid. “Is there a way I can sort of hold Kourtney’s gestating uterus and wave it in front of a camera?” is something I almost guarantee was said. ET Online reports:

Sources close the Kardashian family tell Entertainment Tonight that the wedding of pregnant Kourtney Kardashian and longtime love Scott Disick is imminent.
Sources say the wedding will be the complete antithesis of sister Kim’s lavish affair and that it will be low key, just family. There are whispers that it will take place at the Kardashian family home. No word yet on whether the nuptials will be televised.

Oh, c’mon, is there really any doubt these two getting married won’t be taped and whored for the show? You might as well suggest they decided to have a second child out of love which is goddamn ridiculous considering no one in this family even takes a leak without making a buck off of it. And I’m not talking about the dollar Kim gives them each time. That’s an entirely separate thing.

Photos: Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. KKK

    She Krazy.

  2. Kourtney Kardashian Engaged Scott Disick
    Ravi Sethna Ramalamadingdong
    Commented on this photo:

    Those are the gayest shoes I have ever seen.

  3. Frank Burns

    Disick’s paycheck must have got a zero added to it.

    • Smapdi

      Kris Jenner seems more like the cut-things-off than add-things-on type.

    • Ina Garten's Panty Shield

      Does this guy even have a job? Or is it the same ‘job’ as the rest of the Ks?

      • Reality Bites

        He is supposed to be some kind of manager like Kris representing a liquor company (just what he needs to do) as shown on one of the KUWTK show. However, I think his REAL job is to be a Kourt’s lap dog, and gopher. She carries his balls in her purse. THAT is what he is known for. He is so desperate to be on that show and follow Kourtney around doing as she says is probably what he is BEST at. Such a healthy relationship. How did she get PG anyway? They sleep in sepaaraate beds! Truthfully, I think he is her sperm donor and has no interest in marrying a man she can control. She’s in it for the instant family and he is just a “casualty of war” called the Kardashians. Train wreck in the making.

  4. Math-Man

    X + 0 = X

  5. Cock Dr

    They deserve one another.
    I will not wish them luck; she’s a Kardashian.

  6. Snack pack

    This is just image management by you know who. The fustercluck sheetstorm that continues to churn over the last one needs to go away to protect this money machine. So now they are going to try to capture the adjectives “tasteful” and “understated.” You can bet your ass it will be marketed. Barf barf barf.

  7. marie

    Yawn. This was a very predictable next play in the momager handbook of PR damage control. Actually a very common celeb strategy to have a baby and or get married to white wash bad press. Too little, too late. YOu’d have to be very, very naive to not get what really motivates this family.

  8. I hope the family dies tragically in an airplane accident over the holidays.

  9. Me thinks they buy their babies from the same people Michael Jackson bought his.

  10. dr

    Hmmm…wasn’t it already exposed last summer that Kris Jenner was plotting with E! to make this the third Kardashian wedding special? I seem to remember something about audio recordings where Kris and producers tried to stage a reunion at Kim’s wedding and were feeding ideas for Kourtney and Scott to “contemplate” getting married. It’s a shame that they would drag kids into this because these two together are just a complete trainwreck.

  11. BE

    Yes – what a role model family.

    Market your own “American Porn Princess” marriage that won’t and doesn’t last three months.

    THEN finally get around to marrying the baby daddy after popping out a couple of kids.

    OOH – I want my kids to grow up to be just like the Kardashians.

    • john 27

      just like kim

    • catiebree

      Scott called one of the Teens Moms a bleeping stain on Twitter. What in the world do they think they are? Nothing on Teen Mom was very different then watching Scott go into rants on one of the many Kardashian shows. I just wish they would go away. I remember when E News forced us to watch Heidi and Spencer and finally a petition was signed to get them off of E News every time the show aired. Can’t we do that now.

  12. Kourtney Kardashian Engaged Scott Disick
    Commented on this photo:

    Nothing says “good old family values” like getting married when the second kid is on the way.

  13. Kourtney Kardashian Engaged Scott Disick
    Tommy
    Commented on this photo:

    “ok Kourtney now you get married so people can see we do value marriage” says Chris.

  14. Archies_Leach

    If I gave flying fuck, I guess it would matter.

    • Renee

      I love how everyone says that they don’t care and are sick of them yet they take time out of their day to read the articles and post comments! I find it hard to believe that if someone offered any of you millions of dollars you would turn it down.

  15. Hugh Gentry

    I just want to see Kourtney’s boobs

    • BE

      And with that comment – we have the true “Key to ALL Kardashian Success” – not slamming you – it’d just be nice if they acknowledged that they’re porn princesses instead of every other lame excuse they use for their “popularity.”

  16. Jack Ketch

    The marriage doesn’t disturb me so much (another whore circus) as the fact that they are breeding. THAT’S what is scary. And will you look at the gene pool ? Yes indeed, Snack Pack … barf, barf, barf.

  17. The Royal Penis

    I wish I could make a living impregnanting women as Douche Lord and reign over my Douche family.

  18. Venom

    The desperation to keep this garbage dynasty going is really kicking into overdrive now.

  19. Smapdi

    If you send a gift to this wedding, include a return envelope.

  20. Brooke

    Wasn’t a sequel wedding planned at Kim’s wedding? I thought I read on here that the director asked Kourtney and her boyfriend to talk about maybe getting married or something.

    I really hate this family. Before I didn’t care, but it has slowly escalated from mild contempt to full-on rage with this news. If any of you reading this are thinking “yay Kourtney, you are getting married! I am so happy for you, girlfriend!”, I want you to know that I hate you. I loathe you and your detatchment from reality. You people who say “I watch the show sometimes I guess, but whatever”… I hate you too. I can only assume 80% of viewers are like you, but that is why the show stays on the air and why this miserable family makes more money being glorified whores than any hardworking, honest family I know.

    I would send the Kardashians a box of my corn-ridden diarrhoea if I didn’t know their noses are so full of coke and rhinoplasty that they wouldn’t be able to savor the burning stench of my hatred and would likely mistaken my efforts for a fan-made gift of vegetable curry, which they’d throw away anyway because “eww, peasant food!”

    I don’t even want to laugh at them anymore. I want them to go away.

  21. Prego. It’s in there.

  22. Ravi Sethna Ramalamadingdong

    Sadly, they still have their douchebag brother Rob and two more young un’s to marry off.

  23. Kourtney Kardashian Engaged Scott Disick
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    “Holding this kid is in the script?”

  24. jojo

    The Kardashians are America’s big Joke! They are the perfect example of a mother who pimps her children for profit.

  25. Johanna

    If people would just stop talking about them, and stop blogging it would ‘end’…..eventually. Because all press good or bad is money in the bank. So every time we give energy to this family, we are feeding their bank accounts. Stop talking about them, pretend they don’t exist and see what happens…remember Kate and Jon Plus 8 – GONE!

    • catiebree

      Wonderful advise. Remember how E News pimped Heidi Montague and Spencer Pratt.? Who even knows who they are now. Lets pray that this will also happen to the Kardashians. They have been whoring long enough. Kris Jenner could just pimp for street whores and give her children a break.

  26. Victor

    Love One Another!

  27. Andy

    I can’t understand why some of you guys follow these people news if you don’t like them?! If you take time to watch there pics, watch there show and comment that means that somehow you like them. Or maybe you wish to have such an easy life! Jealous?

  28. GEE

    y dou keep reading their articles if you so much hate them..it doesnt make sense

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