In case you haven’t seen the new Jenny Craig commercials where Kirstie Alley chases a child around the screen and managed to not eat him in a kiddie pool filled with teriyaki sauce, the former Cheers actress has now lost 50 pounds by regularly exercising and limiting her calories through a diet plan.
“When I got fat, I was being stupid. It was a little bit like when I used to do drugs,” says Alley, who has long been sober. “Before I stopped doing drugs, I had to spiritually get a grip and go, `What do you want your life to be like?’”
So let’s review, shall we? She was a drug addict, and everyone liked her more than Shelley Long. She got seizure-inducingly fat, and everyone still liked her more than Shelley Long. Now she’s losing the weight and won’t leave us the bloody Hell alone, and everyone still likes her more than Shelley Long. Shelley Who, you ask? Exactly. But if Shelley Long gained over a hundred pounds and walked around going “Fettuuuccineeee!!” I bet you’d know who she was then, right? Or she’d just be some crazy fat lady. But I’m pretty sure “Crazy Fat Lady” is still a step up from “Shelley Long.” Just sayin’.