Two burglars reportedly sneaked into Kirsten Dunst’s suite at the Soho Grand Hotel after she left to go film a scene for her new movie and stole her $13,000 handbag, wallets, cash, cameras, and an iPod. And how did these master thieves manage to pull off the crime of the century? They walked in through an open door. The Post reports:
Beinerman took a guest elevator to the floor below Dunst’s suite and then took a freight elevator up to the penthouse level.
There, Beinerman allegedly walked through an open door into the penthouse and stole items belonging to Dunst and her companions, including $2,500, a Marc Jacobs purse, wallets containing IDs and credit cards, several bags – including one by Balenciaga – two digital cameras, a cellphone and an iPod, records state.
It takes balls to rob Kirsten Dunst. Big tough manly balls. Most people would be afraid that she lives under a bridge and eats first born children. But not these two. And what if they timed it wrong and she was still in the room? This would’ve been an entirely different story, about two men who jumped to their deaths after gouging out their own eyes and screaming that they’d lost the use of their genitals.
NOTE: If you’re wondering why Simon Pegg is with Kirsten Dunst, no it’s not some sort of troll outreach program for English people. They’re filming How to Lose Friends and Alienate People together.
fza | August 24, 2007 at 12:49 pm
first?
Bite Me! | August 24, 2007 at 12:50 pm
FRIST!!!
Bite Me! | August 24, 2007 at 12:51 pm
Did they take her boobs too?
Annie Fizzbang | August 24, 2007 at 12:54 pm
No, but they did take her bra. Unless she’s hiding guinea pigs under there.
whatever | August 24, 2007 at 12:54 pm
They forgot to mention that he stole her career too..
Tom | August 24, 2007 at 12:55 pm
Hey guys, this is a entertaining site.
I am wondering why there aren’t more pictures and stories of me and my gorgeous wife who i LOVE.
Katie I LOVE you, my WOMAN.
This is Tom Cruise by the way. YES!!!
Have a good day friends.
Bite Me! | August 24, 2007 at 12:56 pm
Guinea pig would be ab improvement to those things under her shirt
Joe Melnick | August 24, 2007 at 12:57 pm
What the hell is Simon Pegg doing within 100 ft of this troll?
Bite Me! | August 24, 2007 at 12:57 pm
@6 Hey Tom – is it true you take it up the ass and Katie uses a strap-on on you?
stephiphany | August 24, 2007 at 12:58 pm
I really hope she just bumped into Simon Pegg on the street and they’re not friends or anything. I like that guy and I don’t want her tainting him with her filthiness.
Wonky | August 24, 2007 at 12:59 pm
I’m all for doing whatever the hell one wants with their money, but a $13,000 handbag? What the F?
bob | August 24, 2007 at 1:00 pm
well, that’s what happens when you are a complete idiot & don’t bother to even close your hotel door.
and who buys a fucking purse for 13 grand. you should have that stolen, just for being a tool & spending that on an accessory.
Tom | August 24, 2007 at 1:01 pm
Hey Kristen! Kristen right?
I remember you from when the ol’ vampire movie.
When did you grow up to be so ugorgeous!!!
you never told me how it was observing my skills and wisdom on set.
hurty elbow | August 24, 2007 at 1:02 pm
Simon Pegg’s costarring with Dunst in How to Lose Friends & Alienate People.
Tom | August 24, 2007 at 1:02 pm
bite me that is a very creative. hah hah haa ha ha ha
Have you heard about scientology?
FRIST!!! | August 24, 2007 at 1:02 pm
What?!?
FRIST!!! | August 24, 2007 at 1:03 pm
She’s doing her Jack Black face again
Chauncey Gardner | August 24, 2007 at 1:06 pm
Thanks to everyone for explaining why Dunst was photographed with Simon Pegg. For a minute there, I thought Pegg was hanging out with an extra from SHAUN OF THE DEAD 2.
Tom | August 24, 2007 at 1:06 pm
She has nice legs.
Don’t you think?
Not like Katies though.
No.
Katie’s has the most gorgeous, long legs you’d ever see.
veggo | August 24, 2007 at 1:08 pm
I piss money away too. I’m drinking a $13,000 bottle of water right now
#1hater | August 24, 2007 at 1:09 pm
at least she still has her talent and good looks….they can’t take that away from her…..
Tom | August 24, 2007 at 1:10 pm
Friends I must go now.
Nice chatting.
Remember Scientology is the answer. Please learn more about it. We plan to take over save the world.
racheee | August 24, 2007 at 1:14 pm
Too bad they didn’t take her sunglasses. $2,500 purse, $1.89 sunglasses from Kum & Go. In 1987.
Donkey | August 24, 2007 at 1:15 pm
This looks like a job for SPIDERMAN!!
FRIST!!! | August 24, 2007 at 1:16 pm
I thought #14 was a joke.
Kimz | August 24, 2007 at 1:17 pm
They are still hiring her to do movies?
Superfish are you the old superfish.
Superfish, I don’t like you playing with my head.
I just don’t know if it’s really you any more.
Jeans | August 24, 2007 at 1:20 pm
It is just sad. She is such a pretty girl gone REALLY bad. Bad hair, no makeup, aweful clothes, and NO bra. What happened to the time she was considered attractive!!!!
Malffy Hernandes | August 24, 2007 at 1:21 pm
Idiot, never stay at a hotel in Soho! I lived there for 3 years and YOU NEVER, EVER just leave shit like doors or purses open! Serves her right.
platkat | August 24, 2007 at 1:22 pm
23 – lol. Nonsense! She’s joining Jake and Elwood Blues on their “Mission from God.”
* * Survey * * | August 24, 2007 at 1:23 pm
If you where in a chinese prison and sentenced to die, but had to make a choice and fuck one of the following girls, which one would you pick?:
*Dunst
*Lohan
*Spears
*Hilton
*Ritchie
Tom Gun | August 24, 2007 at 1:31 pm
If I was going to die anyway I guess I would pick. “HILTON”.
Texas Tranny | August 24, 2007 at 1:32 pm
All of the above.
yeslek | August 24, 2007 at 1:32 pm
I think this is the same exact outfit (if you really want to call it that) that she was wearing the last time she was on this site. Kirsten – if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it, right???
Pimp | August 24, 2007 at 1:34 pm
Ritchie.
I’d bounce her little mulatto ass on my hogleg.
Kimz | August 24, 2007 at 1:37 pm
@33
Yeah I think that’s all she wears lately.
I heard grey shirts are right in fashion, you can wear one to no end. And you will always look amazing.
Donkey | August 24, 2007 at 1:37 pm
I would do Lohan. She has the best tits of that bunch.
Hydro74 | August 24, 2007 at 1:39 pm
NEVER pick Paris Hilton. If it was “Paris” or “Syphillitic Whore,” take the whore. Less STDs, more attempts at making noise in bed.
Gotta go with Lohan. Best body of the bunch, prettiest face and the one I would feel best about slapping around before, during and after.
Plus she would gladly snort rails off my engorged member. And that’s worth the price of admission anytime.
Morning Wood | August 24, 2007 at 1:39 pm
I guess Spiderman was to busy playing poker to catch up with this one…
JrsyGrl | August 24, 2007 at 1:39 pm
Love Simon Pegg.
JrsyGrl | August 24, 2007 at 1:41 pm
Hey, #33, ever think that thesuperficial.com is using the same pictures or pictures from the same day for two different stories?
veggo | August 24, 2007 at 1:42 pm
30- I”m a girl and I don’t want to play this game and I don’t understand why I’m in a Chinese prison…….
But for you guys, whatever choice, don’t you think your dick would come out looking like you just got in a spoon fight……but the other guy used a fork?
Mike | August 24, 2007 at 1:43 pm
I would pick Brit (Spears).
While she’s blowing me I could rub that bald head of hers for good luck.
4 Hours to live | August 24, 2007 at 1:43 pm
Guys, if you were going to die because the world is going to blow up in 4 hours.
And you only had a choice of ONE of following to fuck… Who would you pick?
1. Jolie
2. Theron
3. Bilson
4. Bundchen
5. Biel
Bite Me! | August 24, 2007 at 1:44 pm
@41 Ouch!!!!
The One and Only REAL Goodman | August 24, 2007 at 1:45 pm
@30 Lohan cuz in the end it would all BLOW over
lambman | August 24, 2007 at 1:46 pm
Simon Pegg is doing “How to Lose Friends and Alienate People” AESOME NEWS!
#3 – LOL good one
Mike | August 24, 2007 at 1:46 pm
Biel. No doubt.
But, just for the record are we talking Bundcheon pre-pregnancy or post?
@42 | August 24, 2007 at 1:49 pm
@42
Now that vision of Brit’s bald head bobbing up and down and her looking straight at me from that position is burned into my mind.
That’s a scary thought.
boogmeister | August 24, 2007 at 1:50 pm
Biel for SURE!!! That bitch is as hot as they get!!
Mogwhy | August 24, 2007 at 1:51 pm
Ritchie.