Kirsten Dunst gets molested by friend

March 5th, 2007 // 106 Comments
superficial

  1. NipsyHustle

    first

  2. NipsyHustle

    what’s up with her legs in pic 3? she has to be a virgin. i can’t imagine any man wanting to stick his penis is such a bland, colorless pancake ass.

  3. I didn’t know vampires could come out in the sunlight.

  4. Manistoned

    Her skin is just hideous. Ghastly pale and covered with growths. The worst girl I saw at the beach last weekend looked better than Dumbst.

  5. PrettyBaby

    I don’t think SpiderMan is all that conflicted these days. He’s glad he stuck with the job.

  6. fritobandito

    Man, I hope Powder’s got the number 75 block on!!!!

  7. PrettyBaby

    She looks so ethnic in these pics.

  8. PrettyBaby

    That’s quite a daring swimsuit on Fangina’s breast-fondling girlfriend. Her nickname must be “Stretchie”.

  9. PrettyBaby

    So anybody read any good books lately FUCK THIS IS BORING

  10. PunjabPete

    Hold the phone… What happened to those tits? Those are not the sweater cows she was packing in the rain when she kissed dear old Spiderman…. Where did they go?????

  11. Michelle Double D

    guys… is it a sexy body ??

  12. Jiimbo

    Maybe if we put all 4 boobs together, we would get one nice small one

  13. cate

    Okay, her tits are so gross. I don’t understand how boobs THAT small can be so saggy. Ive got C/D cups, and theyre perkier than that. Shes like, what, in her twenties??? NO EXCUSE!

    And srsly, get a bathing suit with some shoulder straps. gross.

  14. cate

    Oh, and the last pic? Look at those veins in her feet lol!

  15. LilRach

    Poor Kiki :(

  16. Stink

    If Snagglepuss had the body she did in Spider-Man, she wouldn’t need a girlfriend to grope her chest because I’d do it. I’m that nice of a guy.

  17. BigJim

    That’s not Kirsten. That’s Halley-Joel Osment.

  18. DecorativePoncho

    Bandeau bikini tops are so unflattering. They flatten and droopify.

  19. At first glance, I thought that was a guy that was getting fondled…

  20. Amy

    Ewww snaggletooth is just gross, she makes my eyes hurt

  21. mrs.t

    My 93 year old grandma looks better in a bikini. Over her housecoat, even, she is smoking hot when compared to OsteoGhost.

    And I hear she gives better head.

  22. Bree

    Her boobs are almost as ugly as her teeth/face/butt/tummy/body…ahh I give up.

  23. Wow, she’s got the curves of a washboard.

    She also might wanna get that snaggletooth fixed.

  24. kmart

    I wonder if those sunglasses came with her Hello Kitty purse.

  25. applepie

    oh my god, you people are sad. you’ll say anything.
    her friend is putting lotion on her. i was there and saw it. jesus…a spade is a spade.
    pathetic.

  26. applepie

    oh my god, you people are sad. you’ll say anything.
    her friend is putting lotion on her. i was there and saw it. jesus…a spade is a spade.
    pathetic.

  27. PrettyBaby

    They’re certainly not spades.

  28. Gerald Tarrant

    My penis went back to reading Tolstoy.

  29. LL

    Really, really super-unflattering suit she’s got on. Really, she couldn’t do much worse RE color and style. It’s like she picked the suit specifically to make her look as bad as possible. I think her bod’s OK, but the swimsuit she’s wearing is doing her no favors at al.

  30. loachcrulch

    she looks grossed out by the ultra-hairy legs in pic 4

  31. HollyJ

    “Nurse! Quick! This patient needs melanin STAT!”

  32. S.P.F.R.S.

    This should be one of those “Write a caption for this” photos. Caption; ‘Hey I can’t find your boobs what happened to them’

  33. twzzlrgirl

    Her boobs are even saggy in thumbnail pic 1 where she’s wearing a halter top. Good Lord! Her body is awful, she isn’t pretty, and her skin color — my god, her skin color!!

    Oh, and her legs are ugly, too.

  34. twzzlrgirl

    Hey, SPFRS — good one! I was about to post that Kirsten was saying, “yeah, they’re there….feel around…you’ll find them.” But you beat me to it!!

    :)

  35. Binky

    Hey – KD must have been up here in Eskimo-ville – because I saw those same shades in the Discount Bin at Zellers !
    (I think many ‘actors’ are probably gay. Remember those High School plays ? Like… they were all dance musicals…nudge nudge…It wasn’t exactly the Octagon etc…not that there’s anything…wrong.., etc…)

  36. D'oh Eyes

    I believe that’s a Sawtooth shark.

  37. mrs.t

    applepie:
    yes, we all recognize that her friend was not actually ‘molesting’ her. See, the way this site works is kind of confusing. They post a photo of a celebrity, then come up with a tongue-in-cheek caption to accompany the photo. Often, the caption blatantly conflicts with what is happening in the photo. Other times, the caption may exaggerate what is depicted in the photo. Sometimes they might even fabricate a total and complete falsehood for humorous effect, with or without the use of sar-ca-sm.

    Sometimes the posts are funny, sometimes they fall flat. Either way, one needs an IQ of at least 70 to comprehend the fact that this is not a News Group Blog.

  38. Binky

    And can’t some of these ‘celebs’ be bit decent and find a private beach ? Like…too much info…
    Brando was at least decent enough to get his own desolate island before putting on a swim suit.
    That’s why the guy still had fans.
    The horror. The horror…

  39. Binky

    (#38 was a quote, not a comment on ‘Lesbian Dance Party’ of course)

  40. twzzlrgirl

    #37 — mrs.t…you are my new favorite.

    i was gonna pounce on this applepie chick, but my retort would not have been nearly as witty or spot-on :)

    Good work.

  41. pana1718

    damn! those are really small breast!

  42. kenzier

    We now have substantial proof that being skinny does not necessarily make you sexy.

  43. Courtney

    God I really hope you’re all super hot.

  44. twzzlrgirl

    Good lord…please tell me no man on the planet jerks off to this…

  45. GooniesNeverSayDie

    A Kirsten Dunst haiku:

    Seventh grade body
    Anyone can touch her breasts
    Lack of melanin

  46. blpressure

    I’ve been reading superfish for ages but never joined to comment until now when I felt I had to. Why don’t all you sad fucks fuck off and leave her alone. She’s never done anything bad like Britney, Paris and Lohan and doesn’t deserve it. I know someone will come back with “You’re not in the right place, go join a fan site.” Well up yours! I don’t mind celebrity scum getting ripped on but Kirsten doesn’t deserve it. You’re all sad and have alot of time to waste.

  47. flauccinaucinihilipilifcation

    If i had skin like that, i wouldn’t bother with the lotion. Vampires shouldn’t get melanoma anyway.

  48. blpressure

    I’d love to see you freaks in bikinis in Maui. It would be funny/sad like an episode of Idol.

  49. Zed

    #37 You rule, mrs. t. Best response ever.

  50. twzzlrgirl

    blpressure: the difference between me and Kirsten (besides a lot of brain cells and several cup sizes) is that I don’t put myself out there as red-carpet material. KD does. So, when someone who likes to flaunt, to an extent, how good looking they are, and they really aren’t, we at the superficial make fun.

    What did she do to deserve it? She ran around, titless, in a bikini. ‘nough said.

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