Kim Kardashian celebrates her naked stuff

November 7th, 2007 // 111 Comments
1107_kim_kardashian_playboy_00.jpg

Playboy threw a celebratory bash for Kim Kardashian’s December cover last night in New York. It’s nice to see a bunch of people gathering together to appreciate the fine art of air-brushing. Nothing ruins a good boner more than the natural blemishes of a woman. Although that’s not really an issue with Kim Kardashian since nobody’s looking at anything but her bulbous ass anyway. Unless they’re an android. In which case you’ll probably have to kill them. But give them one final test: ask if Kim Kardashian is on her back do you flip her over to see her butt? If they answer “No,” BLAM! Congratulations, you just rid the earth of a dirty android. Or maybe a gay guy which, uh, hmm, I probably should’ve thought this test through a little more. Hey, why don’t you stand over there with the body while I hop out this window? Later!

superficial

  1. Emmyem

    Oh well………….

  2. sarah

    1st?

  3. anon

    Nov 7, 9:16 AM EST
    BREAKING NEWS

    LOS ANGELES–Police were called to Brtiney Spears home at 12:08:16 am. this morning from her residence. The Calls For Service report from the Santa Monica Police Department doesn’t indicate who made the 911 call, but lists “attempt suicide” as the reason for the call. The officers found former pop star in bloody and dazed in a fetal position on her bathroom floor. She was pronounced dead at the scene. The source told SMPD that Britney’s maid found her and that Britney’s family and friends are shocked.At this time the cause of death appears to be drug overdose, however nothing is certain yet and more information will be available as the investigation continues.

    © 2007 The Associated Press. All rights reserved. This material may not be published, broadcast, rewritten or redistributed. Learn more about our Privacy Policy.

  4. Emmyem

    Wow, I was first, and didn’t even mean to be! You can be first Sarah, I don’t care. I wasn’t even trying! Nor will I ever! It was……..I won’t call it luck, because I just thought that was “Oh will this stop? I know Kim’s got a nice air brushed body and huge booty…I’m just a girl, what do I know?
    The Fish was hilarious yesterday when he talked about Angie’s brother. NOW THAT WAS FUNNY!

  5. p911gt10c

    wow, airbrushed in playboy! What a great grab…..if I hadn’t already seen her gettin fucked doggy and masturbating on vid.

    oh, and #2, you’re a loser.

  6. Emmyem

    Yes, that # 2 is a loser, I agree. What a stupid thing to write. LIKE WE WOULD NOT KNOW THAT ALREADY.
    Duh-herrrrrrrrrrrrrr.

  7. Riotboy

    She has nice hips.

    /yummo

  8. I’m with you, #7. Always love to see her awesome butt.

  9. A

    There isn’t a better ass out there now, as I said before she is the complete package, beautiful face, chest, and ass. What more could you possibly ask for.

  10. the explainer

    It seems to be my job to point out that people calling people losers for claiming first, are in fact bigger losers than the people they are calling losers.
    Now, if you’re thinking, hey you’re a bigger loser yet for calling those who call first claimers losers losers, well, let me tell you, you’re wrong (and a loser).

  11. Guy

    &3

    Yeah, right…

  12. Lurker1

    UM— She is FAT as fuck.

  13. WHAT?!

    Um, anyone else read comment #3? Are you kidding me? That was totally made up, right?

  14. sevenandaswitchblade

    I like how in the third pic her ass looks like it is actually eating light.

  15. I saw it, too much air brushing.
    I like her DVD better. She is a definitely a dirty girl

  16. Big

    There is just something about that ass. I am normally a tit man but that ass is something else.

  17. p911gt10c

    #13
    if such a thing were to really happen, the first place we’d hear about it would not be here, believe me.

    #10, you not a loser. You’re an idiot.

  18. #12

    Oh yeah. She’s really fat. Having hips and boobs is like.. the most unattractive thing that a woman can do to herself. She’s supposed to be tall and thin, with an addams apple and rock hard abs. Then she’d be a REAL woman.

  19. double

    She is hot and sexy with big boob, cute ass. Playboy did the right choice to photogragh her. she has an personal account on http://www.meetrich.com/ with some of her sexy pictures. There are indeed quite a few millionaires, even billionaires for this babe to hook up with..

  20. Tits McCholo

    we can only hope she’s dead. it would leave us something else to find to make fun of constantly. where’s lilo?

  21. sportsdvl

    After seeing the pics in Playboy – apparantly she doesn’t have a vagina.

    Oh, #2 – big loser.
    #10 – just an idiot who wishes he was good enough to be a loser.

  22. WHAT?!

    #17 – good point.

  23. BaconMessiah

    Here vacant, robotic eyes scare the fuck out of me.

    Nice tits though, for a moron.

  24. Snarky McComments

    Um, sorry but I just can’t get excited about naked pics of lower primates. Playboy needs to leave that to National Geographic and stick to Homo Sapien females.

  25. Ript1&0

    WHAT HWAHT WHAT??????? BRitney is dead!!!???!??!?! No!!!!!

    I don’t believe it! Don’t mess with me like that man, I just woke up. Love you Brit

  26. KKSUCKS

    KIM K IS FAT AND UGLY. BITCH HAS TO PUT POUNDS OF MAKE UP ON TOO LOOK DECENT. LOOK AT HER FAT ROLLS IN THOSE PICTURES. BITCH HAS HER DRESS ON (AND HER EXTENSIONS AND BUTT PAD) TOO DAMN TIGHT!!!!!

  27. LOLBBQWTF

    #3: Cruel joke………I was hoping for a second…….the day she goes Anna Nicole will be the day I celebrate!

  28. For some reason, whenever i look at her, i have the sudden urge to pee. Why is that?

  29. Duh

    Yeah, she has nice curves, but her dress is TOO damn tight…see how it’s creased across her crotch?? That means it’s TOO TIGHT and it’s pulling apart at the chest as well…TOO TIGHT! Does she not have a stylist?? I can’t believe someone would let her leave the house looking like that.

  30. Lame

    #3 you’re stupid…she was found bloody and dazed…but then dead at the scene? Nice try.

  31. Phy

    Man, I hope Kardashian has the intelligence of a ball of wax. I don’t think I could take it if she also had like a degree in particle physics. She’d pretty much have to take up supervillainy, conquer half of North America.

  32. did she spend her playboy money on that bling?

  33. catty bitch

    maybe she can buy some new shoes now that she’s sold her vag to playboy. those nude color heels are sooooooooooo last year.

  34. BB

    she looks like a moth

  35. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  36. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  37. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  38. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  39. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  40. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  41. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  42. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  43. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  44. Nicole

    Kim is a loser!!! What is she famous for anyway? Is she a model? Is she an actress? Or is it just for her FAT ASS? It’s not even nice looking. Look at JLo’s booty, at least (in my opinion) she’s talented!!

    #3 has so many fucking typos in it, it’s pathetic! I’ll admit that had me for a split second though. That was just mean!

  45. gotmilk?

    29, i thought she was a stylist herself. isn’t that how she got into the world of the rich & famous?

    i just opened this issue last night. she said something about how hopefully people will see how normal “hollywood children” are from the new reality show. how the hell is she a child of hollywood?

    and the price to employ an airbrush expert probably had to come out of Hef’s own pocket.

  46. matt

    Who is this woman?

    Could you please stop posting ‘stories’ about her already?

    Even the Hilton/Lohan/Spears triumvirate is newsworthy compared to this.

  47. she’s so not sexy…fat and ugly…she created such an eye sore in play boy.

  48. big boobs but brainless bimbo

  49. Jim

    “There isn’t a better ass out there now, as I said before she is the complete package, beautiful face, chest, and ass. What more could you possibly ask for.”

    Well, I’d ask for a girl to be:
    a) not as hairy as a monkey
    b) not a receptacle for semen and urine from monkeys

  50. D. Richards

    Kimbo’s trying too hard. I don’t find her exciting. I don’t find her exotic. Kardashian’s ass isn’t even as swell as everyone makes it out to be. There’s a System-Of A Down song that says Armenian women don’t wipe their asses but once a month. Something about the Sun-God “Ra” or something. Plus, the Armenian men really enjoyed a crusty, fecal caked vagina.

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