Kris Jenner is Making Kim, Kourtney & Khloe Get Pregnant At The Same Time

“ACK! These penises are white!”

Now that there’s been a fake wedding, it’s time for Kim Kardashian to start shitting out babies so her mom can sell more specials to E! Except Kris Jenner is going for the hat trick and wants all three of her workhorses to occupy their uteri at the same time. Because, let’s be frank, the numbers on Kourtney’s last pregnancy could’ve been better and bringing a child into the world should always be based entirely on ratings and profit incentives. Us Weekly reports:

What would Kim think if she got pregnant at the same time as Kourtney — who has a 20-month-old son Mason — and Khloe? “That would be a dream!” she gushed to Us Weekly Wednesday night at her Welcome to NYC party thrown by Jason Binn and Colin Cowie. “All three of us pregnant at the same time? That would be amazing!”
Kardashian matriarch Kris Jenner admitted to Us that she puts the pressure on her daughters to have kids. “I would love more grandchildren,” she said. “Mason is the love of our lives, and he is so much fun, but there’s only one Mason to go around. It would be nice if we had some more.”
The girls all seem on board with their mother’s plan.

What should concern a lot of people more than the Kardashians outnumbering us 2 to 1, is that one of these babies is going to have to die. You don’t make three sisters pregnant at the same time without locking down that extra special miscarriage/stillborn/SIDS episode. Any television writer will you that. (Back me up, Secret Life). So it’s either make Kourtney have an “accident” – I’m assuming Kourtney because she already has a baby. – or not make an extra million dollars which is just crazy talk. “Money money money money,” Kris Jenner will say just because.

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Flynet, INFdaily, Splash News