Kim Kardashian’s Doing Everybody

Coming on the heels – PUNS! – that Kim Kardashian has been seeing John Mayer, rumors are circulating that she’s also letting Kanye West go for a ride on the moon bounce she calls an ass. (He was photographed leaving her birthday yacht party just last night.) Of course, her people are denying it which means he’s already impregnated her five times on video and once on Polaroid in case they gotta take this bitch analog because of robots and shit. Anyway, as for what happened to John Mayer, I’m going to assume he’s still in the equation because he likes to run his mouth to the press which practically makes him Kim’s soul-mate, if it weren’t the whole being white thing. Oh, reverse racism, damn your black heart! — Wait.

Photos: Splash News