PSA: Kim Kardashian’s Charity Auctions Are Bullshit

December 11th, 2013 // 61 Comments

Apparently a lot of people weren’t aware that for years Kim Kardashian has only been donating 10% of the profits (More on that shortly.) from her eBay charity auctions to whatever cause she deems worthy and/or happens to be owned by her mom (More on that, too.), so it really shouldn’t have come as a surprise when she recently did the same to typhoon relief in the Philippines. However, it did cause an uproar that she was forced to respond to yesterday which only raised more awareness of how shitty of a human being she is because when you shove your head up an ass as big as Kim’s you forget there even is an outside world let alone how to speak like you’re a non-grifting member of it:

I feel compelled to speak about something that is in my head and my heart. Over the years, I’ve had to grow a thick skin. Being in the public eye, there are times I feel like I get criticized for any and everything I do. I’m used to it now. I just choose not to feed into negativity or become consumed by it.
The problem comes in when I get attacked for giving and trying to help people. My dad always taught me the importance of giving back. I don’t publicize everything I do to help charities and people all over the world. I do it because I want to. I do it because my dad taught me to. I do it because it’s the right thing to do. So for people to attack me for giving 10% of my eBay auction sales to the people of the Philippines, that hurts.
I do eBay auctions monthly and change the charity or church from time to time. I give 10% of all my earnings to charities, not just these eBay auctions. This month it’s for the people of the Philippines, last month was Life Change Community Church.
In regards to these eBay auctions, when the eBay numbers get broken down, the auction management agency that posts for me gets a percentage for all of their hard work, then eBay listing fees, end of auction fees, eBay Store fees, Paypal fees, etc., all add up to about half of the sale. Then I give 10% to a charity.
Truth is how the # is broken down, is neither here nor there. The people of the Philippines need all of our help, no matter how big or small.
Over the last 5+ years, I have listed thousands of items on eBay Giving Works for various causes. I will continue to do what is in my heart and am happy to know many others have enjoyed purchasing from me, as they too are giving with me.
Giving comes from the heart. We all need to be reminded of this as we celebrate the holiday season this year.

Before I even get into Kim’s math of her “charitable donations,” let me just point out for the record that the last beneficiary of her auctions was Life Change Community Church. A church owned and operated by Kris Jenner. So Kim Kardashian gets to write off paying her mom a salary to operate the oldest con in the book. Which was probably the worst example she could’ve possibly used, but then again, anyone who’s a still fan of the Kardashians are probably the type to go, “OMG, did she just say church? LEAVE HER ALONE!”

But back to the donation. So according to Kim’s math, which is already suspect as shit, right off the bat half of the bid gets eaten up by fees leaving only 50% that she then uses to derive a 10% donation which in reality makes it only 5% of the winning bid. That nets Kim Kardashian 45% in profit from a charity auction which apparently everybody should shut up about because she super generously gives to her mom’s church, you guys. I’m pretty sure they arrested Al Capone for less than this, but that could just be me trying to inspire someone reading this at the IRS to be a hero. (Do it for your country.)

Photos: Fame/Flynet, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News


  1. Cock Dr

    It’s all about the Church of Jenner. Who’da thunk it? The whole family seems so sensitive to the plight of the suffering, but this takes it to a new level.

  2. BlinkyTheFish

    Well, I guess you gotta hand it to Kris. She’s clearly thinking ahead to the days where her kids are all whored out, and she’s taking notes from the church of give us all your money – err, I mean Scientology. Truly the American Dream. Exploit your family and religion for big bucks!

    • Hey Fella, Are You George Zimmerman?

      The only thing I like about the Kardashians’ is that they are going to fuck over Kanye West so bad he’ll be in hiding for months. I can’t think of anyone that deserves it more than that self=entitled douche bag. Well, except maybe for the Kardiashians themselves.

  3. No matter how shitty the things they do are. They’ll get away with it. The system in California is set up to allow them to do that. This family is all about maintaining and increasing their own wealth. They’ll soon be adding Kanye’s money to their coffers.

    Fuck this useless cunt and the horse she rode in on which happens to be her mother.

    • True . . . I’m waiting for the moment that comes after they are done sucking as much as they can from Kanye West. They’ll toss that idiot to the curb as fast as possible . . . the cameras will be rolling to show every moment of it.

      • BlinkyTheFish

        So, will they be playing ‘Gold Digger’ as she goes down the aisle or save it for the first dance?

      • “Gold Digger” is the one and only song that I could say, with confidence, is Kanye West’s.

        When did that song come out, eight or nine years ago?

    • Willie Dixon

      Agreed except for how California’s system allows it…not clear on that part.

  4. This comment isn’t supposed to be funny or humorous – it is simply an observation:
    Kim Kardashian is one of the most disgusting people on the face of the earth.

    • BlinkyTheFish

      I believe they call that a priori knowledge. Hey, I actually remembered something from college. Awesome.

  5. Kim Kardashian Legs Minidress Kanye West Red Velvet Jacket
    Commented on this photo:

    Bullshit walks.

  6. Good God What a Fat-Assed Whore

    I like how they changed the name of the church all of a sudden. The sad part is that even though the Kardashians are probably the worst con artists around, Americans have become such stupid zombies that all you need is a little sparkle and flash, and you have stupid Americans eating out of your hands, and opening their pocket books. This country deserves to fail.

  7. urbanspaceman

    American Dream? The Kartrashians are living it. They produce nothing. They contribute nothing. They have no accountability. They’re bullet-proof and critic-proof. And they’re accumulating wealth faster than a television preacher.

  8. Fish, you forgot to say where this house of God is located. Two services a week at the fucking Sheraton Hotel in Agoura Hills, California.

  9. Bryan

    I can’t believe it’s she’s bold enough to only donate “10%.” I thought standard PR for when you’re a rich celebrity with more money than you can spend is that 100% of your charity events’ proceeds are donated.

    • malaka

      to be truly generous and charitable is to remain anonymous.
      otherwise you’re just doing it for your own recognition

  10. Here is the “church’s” calendar for the month of December:!calandar/ctzc
    Yep, nothing is scheduled for December 25th. In fact, except for Sundays the ENTIRE MONTH IS OPEN.

  11. There’s got to be a fraud case in there somewhere.

  12. Jim Liu

    That’s still 10% more than you’re giving.

    • Jim, is it hard to type with Kanye’s dick in your mouth? I say that cause only a money grubbing cunt like Kim the piss bitch would post anything that idiotic.

      • Brock

        Great rebuttal to a valid point…

        Even though it’s little compared to their fortune, it’s still significantly more than anyone here would donate to charity. Stop hating on people donating more than you, you inconsiderate moron.

      • I think the difference might be that *most* people don’t go around claiming that their goods/services/whatever are for charity, then try to hide the fact that only 10% are actually for charity. You don’t take 10 bags to goodwill, then leave 9 in your car and only give them 1. People give when they can, hopefully, which is great, but it’s false to say that her auctions are for charity – and she’s just making it worse emphasizing how much people really do need help, and how much she could help if she gave a flying fuck.

      • Brock, you ignorant slut.

        Again, it’s a charity auction. If you’ve ever attended a charity event with an auction (apparently that’s a little above your social level), you’d be bidding with the assumption that every fking *penny* is going directly to the charity. If you’re the one who’s donating the item up for bid, you’ve donated it. You get a tax deduction.

        You certainly would *not* think that the donors of the auction items are turning around and keeping the lion’s share of the bid for themselves. In other words, *making a profit off of what’s supposed to be not-for-profit.

        Of course, you’d only understand that if you weren’t an ignorant slut.

  13. TiredOfThisGiant-Assed-Bitch

    Just have her answer one question:

    Over the past five years how much net profit was generated and pocketed and how much was donated?

    The only acceptable answer consists of just two numbers (USD please).

    I’m going to guess its a 4:1 ratio profit to donation and the donation only exists for the tax break it provides.

    total bullshit… cant wait until these people disappear into their own vapid world.

  14. Yabbo

    I’m surprised they didn’t call the church Kardashian Kirstian Kongregation Kollection. What a bunch of scamming, useless people.

  15. Kim Kardashian Legs Minidress Kanye West Red Velvet Jacket
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey Kim, Black does not make you look thinner . . . . . so you can take Kanye’s dick out of your mouth.

  16. Bonky

    She should have kept her mouth shut after the auction nonsense.
    Now she is showing that she really is giving less than we thought
    and confirming that she “donates” to her mother as a write off.

    Very stupid girl, shouldn’t be allowed to communicate with anyone on her own.

  17. Just for the record, eBay credits charity auctions the auction fees at the same percentage rate that is being donated. So if Kim gave 100% of the proceeds to charity, 100% of the fees would be waived.

    eBay is a better human being than any Kardashian.

  18. Mohawk Disco

    Sadly, most charities, foundations, churches, etc. are just well designed scams. Legal, tax deductible scams. I always laugh when people talk about non-profit organizations like saints. To be blunt non-profit just means you balance your income statement out so it doesn’t show profit. That doesn’t mean money can’t go through it like local water through a tourist.

    • I have 3 reverends that live in almost a million to million dollar homes in my neighborhood. They drive Jaguars, Mercedes and BMWs and wear expensive suits and whatnot. I will give you three guesses as to the race and ethnicity of two of them and where their churches are located. These fuckers are the biggest con artists out.

      One of my family members is an executive with one of the biggest charities in the World and I can attest to what fucking crooks they are. She bitches if a donor does not put her up in fancy hotels and pay for fancy expensive dinners and drinks. Fucking scumbag.

      Looking up the resume of one of my neighbors out here at my other place the other day. He lives in a nice $700,000 or so house and has two new Porsches, a convertible and an SUV so I was curious what he did. The only job I can find listed for him anywhere is the director of some non-profit/foundation.

      • D-chi

        Wow, what are these people doing? Several of the pastors I’ve known…. well, there’s a reason for the term “poor as church mice.” Let me tell you, you do NOT go into the ministry to make money; often enough you’re just trying to make ends meet. People doing it for the money make us all look bad.

      • Mama Pinkus

        I’m unsure to which race you refer; most money-grubbing “reverends” I know of are as white as this background.

    • Dox

      You can only serve one master….

      And most people choose money.

  19. Slash

    These people don’t deserve any benefit of the doubt, because they’re wastes of space and oxygen, but anybody who would contribute to a Kardashian-related “charity” is so stupid, they would have just wasted that money on something else equally bogus. Lottery tickets or a Nigerian banking scam or somesuch shit.

    Now, if the IRS were to investigate the financial shenanigans and cause the Kardashians real hardship, that would be pretty awesome.

  20. JungleRed

    I have to slow clap for these bitches. Prostitution (fame-whoring), religion, what’s next-politics? Wasn’t one of them going to run for mayor of Glendale? They’re repellent, yes, but so’s our culture for allowing these parasites to flourish.

    • Aggie

      Didn’t one of them make a joke to the effect of “I’m the mayor of Glendale” and a bunch of the resident were like, “gross, hell no”?

  21. So how much did Ray J’s urine, wrung out directly from the hair of Lil Kimmie bring?

  22. I mean come on, look at this vapid, narcissistic, soulless, money grubbing, obsessed with material goods family and how they behave. Anyone who would actually believe that they would legitimately donate money to anyone is either than idiot or a Kardashian fan, there really is no difference.

    The way they behave you would not think they grew up with money. They have the mansions, they always have to have some ludicrously expensive car and always have ludicrously expensive clothes and handbags etc. They behave like new lottery winners. They are so pathetically insecure. My buddy’s grandmother (who is black) has the perfect description for people like them which was always hilarious to hear her say. She would refer to people like them as “new n!gg3rs”, fucking hilarious. Old people are awesome.

  23. The Church of the Kardashians may not have walls, it may not have a congregation, it may not have a pastor with a divinity degree, but you can be damned sure that it has a small army of tax lawyers taking every penny it can out of the mouths of the poor and put into the pocket of these scum bags.

  24. Kim Kardashian Legs Minidress Kanye West Red Velvet Jacket
    Ginger Failed
    Commented on this photo:

    Selling crap on ebay? Is that chump-change for their tax bracket? Why bother?

    • Why? Because they are money grubbing, soul less scum.

    • If their time in the spotlight has proven anything it’s that there is no level they won’t stoop to. If you recall, they attached their names and faces to some low-rent, predatory credit cards a couple of years ago for people with awful credit. The terms were so bad that the government intervened and the Kardashians claimed they didn’t know what they were attaching themselves to and that they had been lied to.

      If you believed then that Kris Jenner didn’t know the numbers inside and out, so she could wring every possible dollar out of every deal they enter into, then they deserve your money. You were just gonna blow your government check on pills and cigarettes anyway.

  25. drunk at noon

    I can just see it now, someone trying to explain to her that yes, there are expenses that charities have to cover, so yes, a portion of the proceeds go towards those expenses. But the portion that *doesn’t* go towards expenses is expected to go to the thing the auction was for itself (in this case, people who lost their homes and jobs and everything they ever had.). I can see her face now, confused and vapid, “But, then why would anyone do a charity auction if they don’t profit?”

  26. Margaret

    Amazing. K-JEN.013 is going for the oldie goldie of making her own Scientology money printing franchiser but she isn’t creative enough or truly insane enough to write and promote her own bullish so she, as so many other before her have, has appropriated the classic model of the long con, the church con. the work has been done, history has established the viability and profits so away she goes. A staff from a D-list Central Casting (Pastor Brad has some nice new teeth, and the others look glazed over enough to buy into whatever pays the bills. Phish Phan Josh has a hankerin for shrooms and knows what the youth are all about because he wears a flannel. Chelsea is his wife. Sister? Whatever, it’s California. Karen is going to jail. Or rehab. Or jail THEN rehab. Then suicide. Pills and booze. And theft. Barbara has a face just MADE to accompany the words ‘embezzelment’ and ‘fraud’ on any newspaper.) How many people know she owns a church? Spread the word, brothers and sisters and brothersisters and trannydads, and fashionistas and all the rest of you weirdos in revolt. Spread the word.

  27. What I enjoy about this is the manner in which it openly depends on the stupidity of their “fans”. There is zero chance that if you’re a person that would buy a Kardashian personal item you’re not a total fucking moron. And sure the 90% of the population that has a functioning brain despises these soulless harpies and everything they stand for, but that other 10% is the cream of the ‘give our money away’ crop.

    They don’t give a shit where the money goes. They can’t do the math to figure it out even if they did care. Even if they did care and did (after months of months of painstaking toil) manage to do the grade school math it would take to figure it out, you could make up literally ANY excuse and they would immediately believe it and take to the internet in poorly worded defense of your actions. Just ANY words coming out of your mouth will be considered a viable defense of your using human suffering to further line pockets.

    If you need an example of this simply look at her completely inept defense of her actions and her defenders on the message board above. It’s basically her saying that people should be grateful she would give anything at all and those people saying that she’s right. Nevermind the fact that ostensibly the point of the entire endeavor was to raise money for charity.

    If no one notices, you get to look generous and keep the money. If they do notice, you still get to keep the money and also get to play the martyr being nailed to the cross for your unappreciated charity. Either way the idiots that keep making you rich will continue unabated.

    They aren’t smart, but the Kardashians are crafty as fuck.

  28. maoix

    Can’t really blame scum if, in reality, it’s propped up by your fellow citizens who are funneling $$$ to them. None of this shit happens in a vacuum; it takes millions of viewers/buyers to keep it going.

  29. Deina

    The people of the Philippines may need all of our help, no matter how big or how small, but if you have the means to give a lot and only give a very little, don’t pretend it MEANS a lot.

  30. whatever

    I’m loving this site more, because you’re bringing the intelligent side out more, and you spill the truth of the people we so loathe, so everyone who can read and understand what they are reading get a clue to why we hate in our comments so much, we’re not one bit ”jealous”, we fking hate those con artists, which is the only kind of artists they’ll ever be. Fck the Kardashians and all other losers, we see right through your shit. Your Bull-shit. How the fck do stupid people get so much money? Because their ‘fans’ are even more stupid. What the hell are they putting in food the past decades? GMO has serious effects on intelligence. It’s hard to believe the stupidity of the world, how do some people have fans at all, too many people adore the empty souls without morals who then rise to fame, Wake the fck up!

  31. Mr. Obvious

    I’m surprised at you people and Fish. Her charity auction BS has been known for sometime now.
    Next you’ll all be surprised to know that she ‘leaked’ her own anal porno, that ‘RayJ’ pee’d on her, that she has had a pill problem, and that she only dates/beards/works as a urinal for rich semi-famous black dudes.

  32. eh

    The ironic thing is, if you added up all the charitable donations of everybody howling about Kim’s giving, they wouldn’t add up to one of her farts. But they are morally superior, because in the fantasy land where the critics aren’t broke losers, but actually have some of the business mettle that the Kardashians have, the critics would be giving 120% of all of their astronomical earnings to charity. Wonder how much of the TheSuperficial fortune has gone to charity?

    • Aggie

      No, it’s that some of us have the moral mettle to be disgusted with an exceptionally wealthy person using charity to benefit herself.

      Now, go back to fucking your cousin, or whatever it is incredibly stupid people do.

  33. MoreMariaNow!!

    How much could it cost to get someone to take care of this fucking dumbass waste of human life!! Im serious it shouldn’t be that hard, she will call and tell you where she will be. Just say your a paparazzi. We should start up a kickstarter for this!!

  34. Kim Kardashian Legs Minidress Kanye West Red Velvet Jacket
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim and her family are freaks and Kanye can’t take a photo without bugging out his eyes and looking like a douche. Good riddance.

  35. Kim Kardashian Legs Minidress Kanye West Red Velvet Jacket
    Commented on this photo:

    OMG !!! Winter dress with summer shoes always a classic… NOT !!!

  36. J. Rowlett

    Im not at all surprised by any of this! I was more surprised by those that actually had the nerve to “defend” her. These people have shown us time and time again the type of people they are. Why do some still feel the need to give them the benefit of the doubt. They really are awful people. But as long as their pockets are being lined, they dont care. And they will ride that money train until it runs out of gas! Anything they can attach their names too, they will, as long as it brings in some sort of profit and//or attention. I can only hope that the Kanye/Kim merger does major damage to both of their brands!

  37. Bob

    Gee, so she basically admitted to running a scam? If that’s the case, she’s dumber than I had imagined.

  38. Juano

    I don’t know why anybody is surprised that they are skimming the profits off these charity auctions. These are the same people who tried to scam young kids with high fee debit cards and then cancelled the contract when the press got wind of it and claimed “had we only known that they were fucking over these kids for fees, we would never have allowed our name to be used.” HAH!

    My guess is that they didn’t actually pay for the clothes they are auctioning either, as they were probably given to her to wear by the designer for the visibility, and some of the stuff auctioned was probably the crap they couldn’t fence from the Humphries wedding farce.

  39. Screw this hairy hoe. BTW, her store on 8th and Washington on Miami Beach shut the fuck down recently. Lol! Dash was the name.

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