Don’t Correctly Call Kim & Kanye Bad Parents

December 2nd, 2013 // 36 Comments
'Bound 3'
James Franco Seth Rogen Bound 2
This Here's The Real Shit Read More »

Seen here taking a public restroom selfie – the creme de la creme of selfies – before doubling as a urinal, Kim Kardashian went off on fans on Twitter after they criticized her because she’s never with that baby that fell out of her, what’s her face? Direction Head. Anyway, it all started when Kim tweeted this:

We took our baby girl swimming today for the 1st time, she loved it so much! #BestDayEver

Which prompted @jlmcbryde to tweet:

probably cos she actually got to see her parents for a change!

And somehow, amidst the sea of people blowing her, Kim saw it and went off:

. @jlmcbryde u sound so ignorant. Bc I don’t tweet or instagram my every move w my daughter means I am not with her 247? We share what we want. Or is it bc I go support my fiance at every show & I post pix? When the baby goes down 4 bed or a nap, parents are allowed 2 work & support each other, maybe even have fun too

So let me just nip this bud: STOP ATTACKING KIM & KANYE FOR NOT BEING AROUND THEIR DAUGHTER. Are you out of your mind? That’s the best thing they could do for her short of losing her at a mall. The more these idiots forget they even have a kid, the less chance I’m forced to write about a six-year-old petitioning the government to be in porn while Kris Jenner recites incantations behind her. Just drop it, alright?

Photos: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, INFphoto, Splash News

superficial

  1. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like her bowels finally let loose after 4 days of constipation eating turkey and biscuits

  2. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Commented on this photo:

    Ok this is just grotesque. It looks like an overfilled diaper. Actually if it was an overfilled diaper, it would be less disgusting than having an ass that looks like this. BLEGCH!

  3. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Mohawk Disco
    Commented on this photo:

    After the music video Kanye also made a commercial featuring Kim’s ass:

    Revulsion… Indignation… Fear… the new scent from Kanye West.

  4. It just occurred to me that I had no idea if North West is a boy or a girl. So I had to google it. In case you’re wondering, she’s a girl.

    Which means her life is fucked. Kardashian boys seem to have an even chance at escaping the sleaze vortex centered on Kris Jenner, but the girls don’t stand a chance.

    • yeah, i had that same problem where I referred to the calf as a boy. I dunno, North sounds like a boy’s name to me. And I’m usually right about that stuff, Kanye sounds like a bitch’s name to me and I nailed that.

  5. I think the real news here is that she hammers out her own tweets with those hooves rather than have her account managed by the Kardashian® marketing team.

  6. JimmyJ

    Holy Kanye is eating well.

  7. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Mohawk Disco
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim, I understand you know less about kids than how to park without a valet so here’s a hint, the bib goes on the KID!

  8. Deacon Jones

    If Kayne walked around like that without a posse of bodyguards, I’d think he was a gay hooker working Northern Liberties in Philly.

  9. My bitch ain’t allowed to go to the bathroom by herself. -Kanye

  10. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Dox
    Commented on this photo:

    Going out on a limb here….
    But that’s the worst implant job I have ever seen. Hope it came with a free body hair removal session.

  11. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Mohawk Disco
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim saw Kanye sicker and she knew what was coming. Ever since he tricked out their car every time she got in it the same alarm came on as when an elevator reaches its weight limit.

  12. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Commented on this photo:

    “Baby got an ass like a bag of wet clothes.”

  13. It’s cool to see that fashion icon Kanye takes his style pointers from everyone I saw at the flea market this weekend. Keepin’ it mobile home.

  14. Ain’t no selfie like a public shitter selfie.

  15. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    MOO

  16. gnarla

    I’m just surprised she knew how to properly spell “each other.”

  17. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Hugh G. Rection
    Commented on this photo:

    A few years ago there was a skit on Saturday Night Live about being anally pregnant. I’m not sure why I just thought of that.

  18. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Pilin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yep, the diaper still here”…..

  19. bodhaiii

    So she’s trying to defend not having ‘posted’ a ton of pictures of the baby…although she’ll post selfies from the toilet…yeah, can totally see where we’re the ones who are f**ckd up.

  20. Mrs. Crabtree

    “@jlmcbryde u sound so ignorant”

    Kim [or her team] might want to check the mirror when throwing around a term like ‘ignorant’.

    It’s been a while, but lets recap what Kim is all about [some of you might want to turn away].

    KIM K, SUPERSTAR

    I am 32 years old, but act like a vain and self-obsessed 13-year old. My dream was always to become a princess. Instead I became an anal porn star, but I still think I’m a princess. My body is full of plastic surgery. My boobs, azz, lips, teeth, cheeks, nose, hair, facelift etc., were all bought from a plastic surgeon. I use to idolized Paris Hilton and I would hang on her like a koala bear all the time just to get my picture taken by the paparazzi. I was very jealous of Paris; so on my mother’s advise we put out a SEX TAPE too. When we first shot the video I had my partner (William ‘RayJ Norwood) urinate on me. Golden showers really turn me on, and I figured that would be enough ‘shock’ to get the ball rolling. Mom didn’t think it was vile enough, so we re-shot the video. In the retake I suck my own shit that’s been smeared on my partner’s dick right after he finished reaming out my black stink hole.

    Although I pretended to be upset by the sex tape, I was the one that sent it to Steve Hirsch at Vivid Entertainment. They paid me $5 million to expose my nasty self. RayJ had nothing to do with the leaked sex tape. Mom and me tricked him into making a porno with me for distribution. My former publicist, Jonathan Jaxson, knows exactly what happened. He’s one of the people I screwed over and refused to pay after our contract was up. Money and fame is all I live for. I am just waiting for him (and many, many more) to come out and reveal how I really am. I exploit my FAKE body all of the time because I lack elegance, class, dignity, self-respect, intelligence, and morals. I really am a very dirty woman, both inside and out.

    My pimp mother, Kris Jenner (who in most ways is a bigger whore than me), fcuked her hairdresser and the pool boy while my father, Robert Kardashian, was at work. Dad was an ambulance chaser, and helped keep OJ Simpson out of jail after he killed Ron Goldman and his ex-wife Nicole by hiding much of the blood evidence from the police. Anyway, the result was my pathetic half gorilla sister Khloe, who is a whore just like me. Whenever my mouth is moving I am lying, as I am INCAPABLE of telling the truth about anything. I pretend that if I lie about things people will eventually believe it. The way I walk, talk, and laugh is fake; and if you look into my eyes you can even see that my soul is fake. I have no personality at all!

    My ex husband Damon Thomas, whom I married at the age of 19 in Las Vegas, publicly called me: untalented, a trashy whore, desperate, a plastic surgery addict, a backstabber, and a cheater. I have no real friends because I have misused and stepped on everybody that has come my way for fame. If you see me in public it’s either because someone is paying me to be there, or I know the paps will be there to take my picture. I am currently using social medias to snake my way in to other celebrity’s lives for friendship and publicity. I show up like a diva to all kind of award shows that I have NO business at all attending. The only award show I should attend is the AVN. I call the paparazzi myself. I learned that trick from Paris Hilton, but unlike Paris I’m too cheap to buy them lunch like she does.

    I have NO talent what so ever. I was thrown off Dancing with the Stars on the second week. I made a work out video that clearly shows I’m in very bad shape. I did a test shoot for Playboy, but after seeing the proofs they refuse to acknowledge me. I got a Razzie for my sad performance in the parody Disaster Movie. I should have gotten one for my sextape as well. My song JAM, I have no words for. It is the most annoying and pitiful song in history. I sing like a tone deaf four year old with a nasal monotone voice; very unfortunate. Recently I made a video to go with the song. In it I shove my HUGE azz into the camera like a baboon in heat waiting to get mounted.

    Anybody who don’t like me for the rotten and lying whore that I am I call haters or jealous. We, the Kardashian’s, call each other dolls; and I alone have tainted the Pussycat Dolls by heisting their concept. I pretend that I care about others, but I could not care less. If I’m at a charity event you can bet I’m either getting paid to be there, or I’m there because I called the paps and want to get my picture taken. If you read the fine print you’ll see I keep 90% of the proceeds from my charity auction. The only person I really care about is myself. I tried to fcuk over children by selling them an insane debit Master Card with predatory fees. Unfortunately it was taken off the market after one week under the threat of legal action in several States. Thankfully I found a new way to rip off the kids, with glam silly bandz. Over weight children should skip normal diet & exercise and do shady diet pills or lipo-suction like me.

    I stole $120k from Sonja Norwood’s (Ray J and Brandy’s mother) credit card. After being busted I paid her back with the money I got from the sex tape I made with her son. That’s the circle life Mrs. Norwood. The clothes at Dash are pure knock offs from top brands and designers. Neither my sisters nor I know how to sew on a button or sketch anything, but we call ourselves fashion designers. Much of our clothing line is made by underage Chinese children. I pay them a dollar a day to work an 18-hour shift in one of my sweatshops. The logo on my perfumes are a complete rip-off from Korcula creator Lindley Bertin, and Chroma Makeup co-owner Michael Rey.

    For World AIDS Day I went off social medias until my fans had raised $1M. I was confident that within 12 hours I would be back. Seven days later I had to be bailed out by billionaire pharmaceutical entrepreneur Stewart Rahr who wanted to spare me any further shame. This is how much my «fans» value and missed me. Not that it really bothers me all that much. Most of my fans are just ignorant working-class insecure teen girls. Most of them will be lucky if they get a GED. I’m doing them a favor by letting them see what it’s like to be one of the wealthy that can shop at stores they only get to read about. The biggest purchase most of my «fans» will ever make will be a used double-wide that has running water.

    I have never been single because I am too scared to spend time with myself. Recently I started popping pills to help myself feel better. Valium, Vicoden, Antenex, and Benzodiazepine really do make a girl feel better; you should try them. Until 2007 I did cocaine with Paris. I know there are pictures as proof, but I will deny forever that I drink or have used drugs.

    I am very much looking forward to the day when my grand children can sit on my lap. Even though they will ask me if I am an anal porn star, because I know that’s what everybody in kindergarten will tell them. I also love to flaunt my gigantic fake hippo azz. It’s my calling card for any rich Black man that wants to ram my azz hard and move on! Evan Ross, Marquis Houston, Scott Storch, Fabolous, The Game, Nick Cannon, Nick Lachey, Tyson Beckford, William ‘Ray J’ Norwood, Reggie Bush, Christiano, Chengo (The Bodyguard is one of my favorite movies ever) Miles Austin, Bow Wow, Gabriel Aubry (only because everybody said I was only into black guys) and my husband of 72 days Kris Humpries; are just a FEW of the men that have ALL fcuked me, pissed in my mouth, AND dumped me. They know that I am trash, and that I will bring their reputations down into the gutter with mine. I will fcuk anyone for publicity. Currently I’m bearding for a racist hip-hop artist (Kanye West). He accused the President of not liking black people during a telethon for the people of New Orleans after hurricane Katrina. I have had many STDs, but the only one I have now is herpes (got that from Paris too). I am pathetic, plastic, and terribly insecure.

    I am a national and international joke, and gave out my own ANAL/PISS SEX TAPE to get famous. I am a human toilet. I am clearly a very sick human being and I am 100% shameless. I am the filthiest famewhore in the whole wide world!

    I am Kim Kardashian… Superstar

  21. Cher X

    Kanye; Can I have my penis back now?

    Kim: Nope, not until after I take this selfie. Then we’ll talk.

  22. anonymous

    Never take a selfie in the bathroom without checking to see if a piece of crap is floating somewhere behind you.

  23. poop

    who cares? all people want to see if her dumb mixed breed baby and caling her a bad parent if she doesnt post pics with it. dont people usually get annoyed when u post TOO many baby pics? why dont yall just say it: you love to hate her

  24. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s fucking disgusting.

  25. dennis

    @jlmcbryde is the voice of TRUTH

  26. Hawk

    When Kim figures out a way for the baby to make money, you’ll see her all the time.

  27. It is like he looked in the photo and realized “oh shit, I am a douchebag”

  28. Hell Fish, that last sentence stopped me dead in the middle of laughing. Just how out of the realm of possibility has a six-year-old doing just this is it when you consider that her mother happily bathed in rapper piss on camera for HER mama-san? And then there’s that skank bag Farrah Whatshit and … ugh yeah /shudder

  29. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Reg
    Commented on this photo:

    Back Fat
    Fat cow Back

  30. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Skirt Kanye West
    Jason
    Commented on this photo:

    damn girl got ugly and fat

  31. Bob

    Yup, don’t expect her to go to law school any day soon.

Leave A Comment