Kim Kardashian appears in the September issue of Allure where she reveals she’s entirely hairless – entirely – and inadvertently admits to making a sex tape just to get her own reality show:
On her ass being the smoothest mountain in North American:
“I am Armenian, so of course I am obsessed with laser hair removal! Arms, bikini, legs, underarms…my entire body is hairless.”
On her willingness to do whatever it takes to be on TV:
“In elementary school, The Real World came on, and I was like, That’s it! I know I want to be on a reality show. And I was like, OK, when I’m old enough, I will make an audition tape.”
On pretending her sex tape wasn’t the “audition tape” mentioned above:
“It was humiliating. But now let’s move on. Not that I don’t think it’s [no one's] business, but I think I’ve done a good job of replacing negative things with positive things. Doing a show with my entire family, I think people got to see the real me.”
Up until this point, I would’ve assumed only Tila Tequila had the balls to turn around and say, “Now you get to see the real me,” after telling a blatant lie about leaking her own sex tape, so kudos to Kim Kardashian for finally crossing that threshold where reality no longer exists and you believe just saying something makes it true. On that note, is she still trying to be a recording artist? Because I hear the Juggalos have this amazing venue for new artists. I’d be happy to make some calls.