Kim Kardashian appears in the September issue of Allure where she reveals she’s entirely hairless – entirely – and inadvertently admits to making a sex tape just to get her own reality show:
On her ass being the smoothest mountain in North American:
“I am Armenian, so of course I am obsessed with laser hair removal! Arms, bikini, legs, underarms…my entire body is hairless.”
On her willingness to do whatever it takes to be on TV:
“In elementary school, The Real World came on, and I was like, That’s it! I know I want to be on a reality show. And I was like, OK, when I’m old enough, I will make an audition tape.”
On pretending her sex tape wasn’t the “audition tape” mentioned above:
“It was humiliating. But now let’s move on. Not that I don’t think it’s [no one's] business, but I think I’ve done a good job of replacing negative things with positive things. Doing a show with my entire family, I think people got to see the real me.”
Up until this point, I would’ve assumed only Tila Tequila had the balls to turn around and say, “Now you get to see the real me,” after telling a blatant lie about leaking her own sex tape, so kudos to Kim Kardashian for finally crossing that threshold where reality no longer exists and you believe just saying something makes it true. On that note, is she still trying to be a recording artist? Because I hear the Juggalos have this amazing venue for new artists. I’d be happy to make some calls.
Photos: Allure
Que | August 17, 2010 at 12:33 pm
Que lok es bueno por que photoshop.
sean | August 17, 2010 at 1:31 pm
I like having sex with hairless 12 year old boys.
F U | August 17, 2010 at 2:27 pm
Fucking molester…
Wank Spankly | August 17, 2010 at 4:01 pm
Yeah, and I bet every time you see a bald guy you yell “OH MY GOD! DID YOU SEE THAT SIX-FOOT BABY?!
Edward | August 19, 2010 at 9:23 am
That’s a stupid statement to say. What about the hair on your head?
Jason | August 17, 2010 at 12:34 pm
Wait. I see a lot of hair on top of her head.
dudeatdudedotdude | August 17, 2010 at 1:29 pm
you’re splittin hairs
Folliculitis | August 18, 2010 at 2:05 pm
oh snap!
alvaro | August 18, 2010 at 10:48 pm
….and judging by just the shadow of remaining “unibrow”, that must be one major shave job…must take hours…what’s she use? A riding lawnmower?
Pico Mornay | August 17, 2010 at 12:34 pm
I’ll eat her hairless ass all day long!!!!
billabong021 | August 17, 2010 at 1:25 pm
I’ll eat off of her hairless ass all day long, provided its wiped clean between meals.
Also, wtf up with that armenian thing? I googled armenians, they’re FUGLY as hell!
Viv | August 17, 2010 at 12:39 pm
What abour the hair on her head?
ItseffingME | August 17, 2010 at 12:43 pm
I don’t care what anybody says, this is a beautiful woman. Big ass or not. Just startlingly beautiful.
Turd Ferguson | August 17, 2010 at 12:45 pm
ever seen her without makeup? She is nothing special without.
dudeatdudedotdude | August 17, 2010 at 12:48 pm
well with makeup she’s pretty. i like that first pic a lot. and yeah that ass is something i could ride into kingdon come
ItseffingME | August 17, 2010 at 4:55 pm
Not concerned about whether she’s a natural beauty. She’s just hot.
PunkA | August 17, 2010 at 12:45 pm
The irony is that her sex tape got her whole family employed. Hell, I bet mom Kris was holding the camera while Kim took it from behind, the Yetti was doing the lighting, and the hot sister the make up. Bet that was a whole family production. The fact she still acts like it came out without her 100% permission still totally pisses me off, though. She has ZERO integrity.
Zooman | August 17, 2010 at 1:33 pm
a) I’ve heard that Kris is a dirty little whore in the bedroom (from a former pro athlete that used to fuck her every now & then – hi Jay)
b) you’re absolutely right. Kardashian and that whore Danielle Staub act like they’re victims, like they got nothing out of it (Staub said “What am I supposed to do, spend a million dollars to fight it?” but never mentions she got 7 figures to release the fucking thing
Cunts like this are just semen receptacles.
FrankNfrtr | August 17, 2010 at 12:53 pm
Her plastic surgery team in coordination with dermatologists & trainers & makeup artists seem to do a great job with this big assed beast.
That cover pic is fantastic.
She is one expensive whore & it’s only available to rich black professional athletes.
Kelley | August 17, 2010 at 1:43 pm
Good one !
NCDude | August 17, 2010 at 12:54 pm
What’s that atop her noggin? Macaroni and cheese?. She better hope not if she ever gets close enough to Kirstie Alley.
Nicole | August 17, 2010 at 12:54 pm
Aren’t armenians super hairy…so hairless with more laser removal than Chewbacca.
McFeely Smackup | August 17, 2010 at 12:59 pm
so basically she’s admitting that rather than being “hairless”, she’s actually covered in hair like a yeti and has to have it all lasered off to keep from being drug off to the zoo every month.
that’s actually pretty gross. think about what that full body stubble feels like when it’s growing back.
dude | August 17, 2010 at 4:47 pm
LMAO. Perfect logic.
hey | August 17, 2010 at 5:18 pm
When hair is lasered off, it doesn’t grow back stupid
Phred | August 17, 2010 at 6:26 pm
You’re right. In fact it grows back quite intelligently.
lmao | August 17, 2010 at 10:10 pm
pwnd!
Doc Schweinstrudel | August 17, 2010 at 1:11 pm
It reminded me of a conversation I had with my brother on the train:
-Look! But for the moustache this man looks exactly like our aunt Lucia!
-This guy has no moustache.
- But aunt Lucia does.
Deacon Jones | August 17, 2010 at 1:16 pm
hmmm, I don’t know of much you can do to compensate for letting a jig piss in your mouth, on tape. Other than joining the KKK.
dudeatdudedotdude | August 17, 2010 at 1:22 pm
wonder if kim, kourtney, or kloe’s middle name starts with a k
Bunny | August 17, 2010 at 3:09 pm
That dude peed in her mouth? Yikes…. I thought he just pissed a little on her tummy. I’ve never seen the movie though. Yuck…
Armando | August 17, 2010 at 1:18 pm
Hey Kim whats that on your head? Over your eyes? Hair – you lying bitch.
Nobodybutme | August 17, 2010 at 1:20 pm
I WOULD LIKE TO SEE FOR MYSELF!!!!!
Weeweewee-alltheway-home | August 17, 2010 at 1:35 pm
LOOK AT THIS PHOTO.
Tweezed brows. Botox. Hair removal on the upper lip. Nose job. Tit job. Fake eyelashes. Lip injections.
WHAT A FUCKING PLASTIC CUNT.
She must absolutely hate, and I mean DESPISE, her natural, furry, fat self.
Kelley | August 17, 2010 at 1:42 pm
You forgot the ass injections/implants/whatever, lol … lying bitch, yes !!
gross | August 17, 2010 at 2:19 pm
agreed! this chick is fake in every single way.
Me | August 17, 2010 at 1:36 pm
That must be pretty difficult for an Armenian to maintain. Those bitches are hairy mother fuckers.
Gene | August 17, 2010 at 1:36 pm
Air heads come in all different sizes.
J.R. | August 17, 2010 at 1:46 pm
Sooo… this means she draws her eye-brows on? Bulls%$t! Just another liar… which I must say makes her a very ugly woman (or person, for that matter.) And THAT doesn’t look like a wig either. What a LIAR!
thunderstud | August 17, 2010 at 1:50 pm
I hate Kim…. but I will admit she looks pretty good in that first pic (for a change. Usually she looks like an attention whore).
SHE SHOULD GROW A HAIRY BEAVER SO I CAN RUB MY DICK ON IT | August 17, 2010 at 1:50 pm
HER RAZOR MUST SMELL LIKE A FUCKIN SHIT WHEN SHE SHAVES HER ASS HOLE
Jac | August 18, 2010 at 12:44 am
I’m pretty sure she had that lasered off too. Probably had her anus bleached too. Ten-to-one the only thing real on Kim is the pee that Ray J expelled on her.
FruitLoop | August 17, 2010 at 2:08 pm
What does she do, wax her ENTIRE body? I understand she means to tell us she shaves her pussy completely. Humans have hair all over their body, EVERYWHERE, except our palms and bottom of our feet.
Maybe young girls that idolize and wanna grow up just like Kim will be sure to keep themselves nice an shaved.
lol | August 17, 2010 at 2:14 pm
plastic and fake. anything more to say?
gross | August 17, 2010 at 2:16 pm
the only reason she is “beautiful”‘ is because of plastic surgery. this chick is nothing less than a lying, air headed brat.
Eric | August 17, 2010 at 2:17 pm
Love a smooth woman. She just went up a notch in my book.
Jessics | August 17, 2010 at 2:31 pm
Why is she suddenly a Caucasian woman? Is that an added bit if photoshopping to try and convince us that she has no body hair?
Cyrus | August 17, 2010 at 3:21 pm
She was always a Caucasian woman, in both definitions of the term.
Caucasian — (people indigenous to the Caucus Mountains) Yep, she is Armenian, or at least half.
OR
Caucasian — (people of the Caucasoid race: i.e. European, West Asian, South Asian, North African). Yep, she is Caucasoid.
F*ck you back dude | August 20, 2010 at 5:41 pm
Cyrus you talk crap, shut up.
Kelley | August 17, 2010 at 2:35 pm
Check this out … “I’ve never had any work done.” Fuck, I don’t think she has an original body part left !!
http://starcasm.net/archives/23945
nameless | August 17, 2010 at 2:47 pm
we already know she released the sex tape to become famous. we also already know this bitch as more work done to her body than custom hot rods.
her face as morphed over the last year alone with her new cheek implants.
Kelley | August 18, 2010 at 9:07 am
You got ‘er … good one !! Probably the only thing she hasn’t had done is a knee-lift … she may not have ass-implants either, but there’s definitely been injections down there. Check out old pictures of her. She wasn’t that attractive. When is this clown going to realize that everyone knows she’s as plastic as a Cracker Jack toy ? Demi Moore also denies having any work done despite the boob job, Botox, nose job, cheek implants, knee lift and God knows what else, hilarious.
Froghammer | August 17, 2010 at 2:55 pm
Well, that’s a full-time job.
DEATH BY STONING IN HOLLYWOOD | August 17, 2010 at 3:09 pm
STUPID HIGH NO CLASS ESCORT GET THE FUCK OUT OF THE WORLD DIE SOCIOPATH PATHOLOGICAL LIAR
Janet | August 19, 2010 at 6:47 pm
Wow “death” and 99% of the people commenting on this really need to get their own lives. Most of you sounds like bitter, unhappy little people. I would hate to be any of you.
DEATH BY STONING IN HOLLYWOOD | August 17, 2010 at 3:35 pm
KIM IS SO DESPERATE TO MARRY GETTING OLD KIM
DEATH BY STONING IN HOLLYWOOD | August 17, 2010 at 3:35 pm
HOW JEALOUS IS KIM THAT THE BEASTLY SISTER WITH A PERSONALITY LANDED A PRO-BALLER.
stephiphany | August 17, 2010 at 4:38 pm
Without laser hair removal I bet she’d have pubes up to her belly button.
dudeatdudedotdude | August 17, 2010 at 5:25 pm
eh some guys actually dig that. hairy legs too. not me but some
squiggy | August 17, 2010 at 4:45 pm
1 – Last time I checked, she’s not bald, so we know she gots brains!
2- lol @ the concept of a hairless Armenian. How dumb does she think we are…oh never mind, I forgot about number 1 again.
Crat | August 17, 2010 at 5:22 pm
Destroying hair follicles is really, really bad for one’s skin. Follicles contain the stem cells that regenerate it.
johncena123 | August 17, 2010 at 5:25 pm
fucking ugly concieted fatass ok well shes not fat shes just a midget with a horse face and HUMOUNGUS HIPS holy god there like 50 inches
Me | August 17, 2010 at 5:36 pm
Her face is hideous. Kourtney is the hottest sister. The younger one looks to be maturing into a beautiful girl too. Kim and the amazon Khloe are ass-ugly. Kim has a nice body though. Khloe… she is just a fat mess.
jimbo | August 17, 2010 at 6:09 pm
so whats on your head? an Armenian Squirrel?
jimbo | August 17, 2010 at 6:10 pm
shaving that ass must take hours?
anon | August 17, 2010 at 7:02 pm
hahaha…i bet Kim thought if she mentioned a hairless pie it would be sexy. Instead, we are all thinking about how it takes an medical doctor with an industrial strength laser to remove all the hair from her huge hairy Armenian ass.
The girl with the rough tattoo | August 17, 2010 at 7:23 pm
I’d love to see a reasonably hairy Kim….Not much, you know. Some fuzz on the small of the back, tiny on the arms, curly petite ones between crack…And Im not even into hairs. That much!
timmy the dying boy | August 17, 2010 at 7:29 pm
I’m trying to imagine what it’s like to full-body-wax a Sasquatch. I hope she’s a big tipper.
Mel Gibson's Shrink | August 17, 2010 at 8:07 pm
That is SUCH boloney! First off, no one who has eyebrows that thick and dark has a hairless body. Secondly, she is Armenian, which by default precludes her from bein hairless. Those chicks have mustaches thicker than a Mexican fire marshal. So, yeah, Kim, laser hair removal is your best friend.
Kris Angel Douche Bag | August 17, 2010 at 8:40 pm
I think she is saying that she IS hairy, because she is Armenian–and that’s why she gets all the hair removed with lasers.
I don’t know why she would say that though. Who wants to breed with a girl that will produce hairy offspring.
dudette234 | August 17, 2010 at 9:35 pm
she’s drop-dead gorgeous. if you’re born hairless, then good for you – don’t go around whining anytime other people shave their legs. if you’re not born hairless, you can’t be blamed for trying to remove it.
gross | August 18, 2010 at 9:10 am
it’s called plastic surgery darling. there isnt a real thing on her to make her drop-dead gorgeous.
What an idiot | August 17, 2010 at 9:48 pm
Someone needs to shut this legspread slutty human toilet seat up. She’s a whore; pretending to be “nice” doesn’t change the fact that she’s self centered, self important, arrogant, snotty and a whore. Let’s stop talking about her; she’ll die without attention. Let’s stop talking about her right now!
M | August 17, 2010 at 9:49 pm
She kind of reminds me of Peg Bundy. I think it’s the big head and overly done look.
Brooke | August 17, 2010 at 9:53 pm
Are these old photos? It looks like she’s 40 pounds lighter with her old (and much nicer looking) nose. I didn’t even recognize her. Her skin is really white in these, too. Someone out there is a Photoshop Master.
Matt Damon | August 17, 2010 at 9:54 pm
The only hairless Armenian in all of Glendale. You heard it here first.
Commando | August 18, 2010 at 12:11 am
She’s starting to look old…………….
Heidi Montag | August 18, 2010 at 12:28 am
The whole family chipped in and purchased the laser from Goldfinger. Their power bill must be fucking huge every month.
Don’t the neighbors complain about the stink of burning hair??
Heidi Montag | August 18, 2010 at 12:37 am
the chick is idian from idia, her dad is idian, idians are hairy. very hairy. check it out.
lol | August 18, 2010 at 6:48 am
Never seen this mistake before. You must mean Indian, right? Too bad she has none of that in her blood. Her papa was Armenian, mother is an Americanized Irish-Dutch.
kittyluvr1958 | August 18, 2010 at 3:05 pm
Hey knucklehead! Learn to spell.