Kim Kardashian has accepted the call to attend the Marine Corps Ball in North Carolina tonight.
“She was invited by one of the Marines who is a part of the planning committee for the event to attend as a special guest,” a source tells E! News exclusively. “She’s in production now, but was able to move things around and make the trip for this. She’s really looking forward to it.”
I’ve often wondered what it would to take to make our brave men and women in uniform realize what sort of country they’ve really been fighting for and turn around and join Al Qaeda. This should probably do it.
KIM: And because of you I get to be on TV because my mom leaked my sex tape and taught me to exploit opportunities like this for every last drop of publicity. Thank you!
MARINES: ALLAHU AKBAR! ALLAHU AKBAR! ALLAHU AKBAR!
KIM: I don’t know what any of that means, but you’re welcome!
MARINES: DEATH TO THE WHITE SATAN! *strap bombs to chests, march towards Washington*