Of Course Kim Kardashian Glommed Onto The Madonna Badger Tragedy

“But would he fit in Reggie’s old uniform?” she found herself thinking.

Just to bring everyone up to speed, here’s the horrific account of how former Calvin Klein marketing wizard Madonna Badger lost her three children and parents on Christmas morning in a tragic fire. Via New York Daily News:

Shortly after Madonna Badger and her boyfriend sat wrapping presents in the soft fireplace glow, the mother of three stood frantically screaming for help on the burning roof of her Connecticut mansion.
Badger, her boyfriend, her elderly dad and firefighters tried desperately to fight their way inside the blazing three-story home, but couldn’t overcome the soaring flames and searing heat.
The dead girl’s grandfather nearly pulled one trapped kid to safety, but he collapsed from carbon monoxide poisoning on a flat section of roof — and the two died just inches apart.
Lomer Johnson, 71, was found buried beneath blackened rubble just outside an open window near his granddaughter’s body.
“He died on the outside, and she died on the inside,” Stamford Fire Chief Antonio Conte said Monday. “She was right next to him.”

Absolutely gut-wrenching shit, so no wonder it became a top headline which naturally drew Kim Kardashian directly into its famey glow. Here’s what she posted to Twitter:

My prayers go out to the family of 3 children &their grandparents who lost their lives in a house fire in Connecticut on Christmas.

Which sounds reasonable if you assume Kim Kardashian has a soul, but if you’re like me and my new Twitter hero JT King, you know that feeding her tweet into the Whore Translator 5000 produces the following message:

ME ME ME ME. Ignore my divorce because I’m so caring now. ME ME ME ME.

Shameless whoring aside, and this is probably the exactly wrong time for this, but “Madonna Badger” has to be one of the most badass chick names I’ve ever heard in my life which is surprising because women don’t usually have badass names. I’m dead serious. It’s right up there with Houndstooth Razorclit.

Photos: Splash News