“Our entire marriage was a fraud right down to this prosthetic penis she made me carry all the time. Oh, God, I can still smell the foam rubber…”
I want to say I’ve been holding off on covering Kris Humphries seeking an annulment of his marriage to Kim Kardashian because I wanted to see what the endgame is, but honestly, I’m just as fucking sick of these people as you are. That said, sometimes you just gotta suck it up and make the donuts, and at least these donuts are filled with a delicious, prenup-invalidating jelly that will allow Kris Humphries to shat all over the Kardashians in the press. RadarOnline reports:
The NBA star formally filed a response Thursday in the divorce proceedings that Kardashian initiated after only 72 days of marriage. Humphries wants the marriage annulled on the grounds of “fraud.”
It’s a brilliant strategic move because by seeking to have the marriage annulled, Humphries can request that the prenup be tossed, primarily so he won’t be muzzled by the confidentiality agreement.
“The confidentiality aspect of the prenup is extensive and was created just in case things went bad, neither Kim nor Kris could discuss their relationship to the media. But now, Kris wants to be able to talk about the relationship without fear of being sued,” a source close to the situation tells RadarOnline.com.
Of course, this could’ve been avoided had Kim and her mom not immediately launched a smear campaign re-editing the new season of Kourtney & Kim Take New York to make Kris look like a farting jackass along with planting gay rumors in the tabloids, but that would require them to be rational, non-whore-vacuums who actually think they could somehow make Kim look good after she essentially ran out the door of the church with a bag full of cash going, “Moneymoneymoney!” I might as well have said they could’ve avoided this by transforming into cars and trucks so humans will never know of their secret robot war against the Decepticons.
Photos: Splash News
Yes, you’re right, I am fucking sick of these people. And posting more about the fake controversy over the fake end of their fake marriage just supports their egregious trollery and fakery and makes them richer. So please stop.
Hi, welcome to The Superficial. First time?
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Seriously, I’ve had enough of the “if you critical bloggers would stop, then they would go away” comments. Because if anti-Kardashian sites like The Superficial “just stop,” that will leave only the sycophantic pro-Kardashian coverage. And *they’re* not going to stop, they won’t even hear you.
Well, so far, the Kunts went into hiding, we haven’t heard news stories day in and day out over them. Your wish is coming, thespiral. One day at a time.
“…she essentially ran out the door of the church with a bag full of cash going, “Moneymoneymoney!””
My first laugh-out-loud of the day. Thank you.
ditto!
One can only hope that this “marriage” money grab ploy will be the ultimate downfall of this wretched klan.
Run your mouth Kris. Tell us EVERYTHING.
I would actually be interested in what Kris has to say as well because then it might be the last thing we have to hear about the kardashians.
Misspelled Kardeuchian.
Misspelled KarDOUCHEian, unless you’re implying that they’re German, in which case I stand corrected.
I am with you. I hope the Kardashians dissapear forever and we neer hear from them
Another morning, another post about the dead-eyed whore and her latest Neanderthal.
Fuckin’ A! The pics must come cheap.
BUZZMEDIA Publishers: AbsolutePunk I BritneySpears.com I Buzznet I Celebslam I Celebuzz I ConcreteLoop I OKMagazine.com I GoFugYourself I Idolator I JustJared I JustJaredJr. I KimKardashian I KhloeKardashian I KourtneyKardashian I NicoleRichie I KendraWilkinson I PacificCoastNewsOnline I SocialiteLife I SoundsOfBuzz I Stereogum I TheSuperficial I WWTDD I WhitneyPort I Videogum I More… Need there be anything more said as to why there is a new post on the Kardashians every morning?
While “Fish” complains about being fed up with the cash-whores of the Klan Kardashian….the management at Buzzmedia feeds from the Kardashian Kash Kow….
Now be ready for Fish’s slam of me posting this, like he always does when someone suggests that he is being paid to post Kardashian Krap..
I hope he gets his annulment. These gals ( I am not about to call them ladies, as a lady has class) deserve a little payback.
A L-O-T of payback. Fixed :)
If Kim were a Decepticon, she’d transform into a dump truck.
Khloe, of course, would transform into an aircraft carrier.
LOL!
I’m not so sure Kim wouldn’t transform into a toilet. However, I’d be inclined to believe the entire bunch of them would combine to form a super dump truck.
Let me get this straight. This bitch has a sex tape, has xrays of her ass on tv, and now is worried about a confidentiality agreement? Fuck her and her disgusting famewhoring family. I feel like I’m in the middle of the fall of the Roman empire. I can’t believe Americans fall for this shit and give this family the time of day….much less their hard earned money.
And here I thought I was the only one seeing the parallels between the Western world and the fall of Rome. Thank you!
Do you like gladiator movies?
Yeah, cuz no one ever compares the rampant cultural decay in America to Rome’s final days…nahhhh never heard that one…
@duh you need to be educated, don’t worry though, we don’t expect much better from you Americans
sextape made her famous, ass x-ray was to divert from all her plastic surgery including brazillian butt lift and shaping, my point, intentional to keep her fat ass afloat. What she doesnt want to come out is that her hair is fake, tits fake, tons of facial procedures and the things that go on in that house of horrors these people reside in. He is definitely the type of person that wants to have his say, he wont be the most elegant and they will blitz him but he will say he felt set-up, that is wasnt about him and her but about getting someone, anyone to stand in as groom, how hurt he was to find out about the divorce the way he did and how he really loved her and last but not least, how he knows he will find love but he will be more careful next time. Basically, boring shit. He is too dumb to kick them where it hurts. If he gets the annulment it will be the beginning of the end for kk (not because kris will say juicy shit, but it is prophecy), if he doesnt get it, she will march on. We have a 50/50 chance people. Now is the time to pray to baby jesus and the mother virgin or whatever.
Patience, puddleduck, the Kunts’ doomsday is at hand.
That is my f#$%@ point!!!!! How in the hell did you guys allow the media to bring this whores into the homes of the American Families. People without f%$^ morals or regards for anyone. The dirtiest and darkest things in the streets is what they represent. And I say why did you guys, because I never took the time to watch a single one of their shows because from the very beginning I have been disgusted!!!! I like your comment puddleduck
If the marriage is annuled it means the marriage never existed therefore the pre-nup never existed!
Your post is sheer brilliance! & you have pegged that Kardashian troll as she really is – a money hungry dumbass.
Here’s hoping that Kris gets his annulment & gets to dish it out in its entirety. Bet she will double back & pay out then.
xo
Native NYker
RantsThoughtsMerde.com
Hey I went to your link and think you should try registering MerdeRantsThoughts.com so people know what they are getting into.
Also, spammers get colonic yeast infections.
Oh! Hahaha! Ew!
Come on fish, you are sick of these people? That’s like a hooker sick of Johns.
Team Humphries!
Fish, as always excellent reporting. Leave tomorrow for the mountainous sandbox again, you all be good and enjoy the holidays.
P.S. Kourtney would transform into that little annoying robot that M. Fox held in her purse………
america gets the culture it deserves.
please buy this boy some latest computer games.
HE WILL BE QUIET FOR SOME TIME!!
That was the problem with the marriage. That thing of his still wasn’t big enough.
Who cares? The Kardouchians are laughing all the way to the bank.
I still would bend over for him any night of the week. Fug face, but hot body!
Wow you’re right. I’ve been so distracted by his face this whole time, I never noticed the goods underneath!
Looks like we got ourselves a paper bagger!
Marriage annulment is ridiculous. If the marriage never happened, what the fuck is the bullshit we’ve been watching for the last several months on every magazine and tabloid channel that the ‘Douchians can get their paws on?
The giant vibrator seemed like a good idea until they discovered it would take 5,308 AAA batteries.
Autobots. The bad guys fight the Autobots.
Somebody anybody? Sit in the watchtower and pick them off..
Finally pictured: big black microphone!
The scary thing is even at that size, Kim can still take it all in.
So, is the husband in on this or is he just a patsy?
It’s impossible to not make the obvious joked here.
Kim asked Kris to return the toy for one that urinates.
“Nah, this is just the prototype. The production version will squirt up to 3 gallons of hot piss. Boom.”
Kim Good dress code with sex apple & buttock & tight ass
Kim Starring at what leaving your Kris ! Found some thing more interesting ?
I guess I have to give it to the guy. When one is young, one makes mistake. He is only 26!!!! he is a baby inside a huge body. I wonder if the poor thing really thought he was winning the lottery with Kim Kardashian. It takes maturity to understand that a woman with the track record of her and her family is nothing but bad news. I understand too that up to a point parents must respect the children’s decisions, but I wonder if his parents ever advised him of what the consequences would be marrying someone like her. Someone who even though she is on the news today, she is well known for nothing but being a money-attention hungry ho! I feel sorry for the guy because I know how hurtful an eye opening like this can be. Keep it up Kris, and go with all your mighty against those people and save America from the moral destruction the Kardashians represent.
phew, thank god. i thought i would have to suck a white dick
This poor schlub! Mr. Humphries could be the biggset jerk on the planet and I would STILL feel sorry for him for marrying into the Kardashian cult. I do, however, wonder how a guy would be shocked to learn that sweet, innocent Kim who may be the first woman on the planet to PROMOTE her own embarrassing sex tape has been married before. Normally I would mock someone who has acted so foolishly, but I suspect that once in the clutches of the Kardashoraptors there was non escape.
Ah those Krafty Kardashians. This is what happens when you go up against them, you get herpes all over your public image lol.
Haha thats because Kim is the one who gave it to him…god knows shes picked something up from banging half of the country
Are cows vunerable to human STDs?
MOOOOOO
I think the obvious implication is Kim is so riddled with diseases that herpes doesn’t even make her top 10 things to worry about.
Gluteal elephantiasis should be her primary concern.
Kim doesn’t need to sue, where do you think he got?
Butt plug, from the Pleasure Chest in LA
“Oh, oh, shit, I’m almost not in this picture”
**ducks head
She fucking loves the fucking camera so fucking much. it’s fucking mind blowing
http://urbanbellemag.com/2012/07/kris-humphries-to-testify-that-kim-got-furious-with-him-for-being-too-tall-for-photo-ops.html
she’s completely vapid. she is souless. she is like a ginger that has been dyed. she is a mirror. she is the tear of a unicorn. she is large, and sad, like a kitchen sponge. she doesn’t even have blood. she is a demon
She is not a demon. She is an udder.
She has that scary smirk on her face. Gets me every time. I shit my pants. Every time. Why does she have to be so scary?
She looks like a fat ribbon pretending to be happy.
Even Kris knew how their story was gonna end…
This picture was prophetic. She got the gold mine, he got the shaft.
oh, you’re just jealous