So Kim Kardashian’s Flour Bomb Stunt Worked

March 23rd, 2012 // 75 Comments
No Quarter For Ass-Whores
Jon Hamm
Jon Hamm Responds To Kim Kardashian Read More »

Fridays are typically a slow news day, so you’ll be surprised to learn that Kim Kardashian was conveniently flour bombed last night during the launch of her new perfume so of course that’s all anyone is talking about this morning because if there’s one thing we’re all good at in this entertainment biz, it’s being lazy and predictable. On that note, Kim isn’t even pressing charges and E! is hard at work painting this poor woman as a crazed fur activist even though she was most likely a poor immigrant promised untold riches in America by a lying serpent of a woman:

OFFICER: I can’t get this one to crack. She won’t speak English. Send in El Guapo.
EL GUAPO: I am already here. *descends from ceiling light, removes sombrero*
OFFICER: Can you get her to talk?
EL GUAPO: I shall speak to her in her own tongue. Señora! ¿Te dirá El Guapo por qué tirar la harina a la mujer con la culata de un camello? [Will you tell El Guapo why you throw flour at woman with the ass of a camel?]
WOMAN: Me dijeron que podría haber puesto a preparar al wookie una. [They said I could have a job grooming the Wookiee one.]
EL GUAPO: Se le mintió. El Kardashians no tienen honor. Su familia es la de un urinario que los hombres orinar en libertad. Ahora, ¿quién le paga? [You were lied to. The Kardashians have no honor. Their family is that of a urinal that men piss on freely. Now who paid you?]
WOMAN: It was the plastic one with the dried up puta! *spits on the floor*
EL GUAPO: A HA!
OFFICER: You’ve done it again, El Guapo.
EL GUAPO: And so I have. And so I have…

Fin.

UPDATE: Swapped the region-locked YouTube video with TMZ‘s, and notice how the flour bomber is behind the security rope and just waltzes right up to Kim. Seriously, if was that easy, she’d be dead now. People hate her.

Photos: Fame/Flynet, Getty, Splash News

superficial

  1. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    karlito
    Commented on this photo:

    actually it was thrown on her because that’s how you find the vagina on a fat girl…you throw flour on them and look for the wet spot.

  2. Mr. Poop

    That black woman with her jaw at the floor has not seen enough shit in her lifetime.

  3. yeah, it was staged

    Christ, even Lindsay wouldn’t stoop to this.

  4. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    momostyle
    Commented on this photo:

    (girl in the back)
    *oops* My secret stash of powdered sugar donuts just blew up!

  5. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    momostyle
    Commented on this photo:

    Fat girl: «Her fat ass + flour = looks soooo much like a powdered sugar donut…. OMG !»

  6. 2 questions:
    –Where was Jon Hamm during this?
    –Is there any chance that the white powder is weaponized anthrax?

  7. It is going to take a lot more anti-fungal powder than that….

  8. I wasn’t alive in November 1963, but I think now I know how it felt on that horrible weekend when that footage of Jack Ruby shoving a gun into Lee Oswald’s stomach flashed across our nation’s TV screens.

    Wait—this is nothing like that. This is just stupid.

    • I was alive in December of ‘ought-nine, when images of that horrible weekend that Snooki accused a bunch of strangers in a bar of stealing drinks and one of them punched her square in the face. As that footage flashed across the nation’s screen, I first remember thinking, “back, and to the left”, and then, “whatever tops this is going to be awesome.”

      Sadly, this is not it.
      [img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/03/23/jersey shore punch-340_194.jpg[/img]

      • rantatonne

        Though it is partially from not currently living in America, I am proud to say that this is the only actual ‘video’ I have seen of Jersey shore. Proof that you don’t have to go to hell to know its hot.

  9. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    No, Really
    Commented on this photo:

    It was just assault and battery with intent to harm so they aren’t going to press charges in order to encourage others to come up to Kim Kardashian and physically assault her. No need to get the police or lawyers involved, it’s just Kim.

  10. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    MOO

  11. Throjo

    Her “boyfriends” usually do this to find the wet spot.

  12. THINGS THAT MATTER

    WHO CARES ABOUT THIS WHERE IS JUSTICE FOR TRAYVON MARTIN… HIS KILLER STILL WALKING THE STREETS!!!!!!!!!

  13. Bane

    Today Show….”paramedics were called to the scene, but Kardashian refused treatment.”

    JHFC…….

    .

  14. pretty vacant

    how long did it take lilo to get there and snort that carpet clean?

  15. Aaaaand I just came.

  16. elephantman

    She has a fat ass!

  17. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Skandashians Blow Chunks
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s what you get for pissing on blacks.

  18. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Tom
    Commented on this photo:

    This isn’t the first time Kim Kardashian has been pasted with a white substance.

  19. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Commented on this photo:

    Within seconds, Lindsay Lohan was charged with a second assault on Kim for aggressively trying to snort her.

  20. Wait. I think I just figured it all out. The flour-bomber is actually a loyal Bossip reader who misunderstood what they meant by “choppin them cakes.”

  21. Just_As_it_IS

    I would hate to be one of her bodyguards right now. Someone’s about to get fired.
    It’s hard to tell, but I believe if I was watching over her, this wouldn’t have had happened.

  22. Jamie Lynn's Uterus

    Too bad it wasn’t a cinder block.

  23. cramer

    I would have bought all Superficial readers a steak dinner if it was sulfuric acid.

  24. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Havin her havin me
    Commented on this photo:

    Not only does she have a dandruff problem but apparently she smells terrible.

  25. Faith

    I’m sure everyone on this blog is broke, ugly,and oh yeah did I say UGLY!!. Anyone that can hate on somebody that you don’t even know really tells alot about u HATERS!!! Ya’ll sound angry. Lol!!! Haven’t your mothers taught you if u don’t have something nice to say don’t say anything at all. But thats the problem with these disrespectful a## youngsters now. Your mothers not teaching ya’ll sh##!!!!! This stuff is entertainment, stop making it your life!!!!!! And go get one while you at it……………

  26. josh

    Flour is ok but a brick is more deserved.

  27. FUCK Kim Kardashian! That is all.

  28. tlmck

    Hmm, not pressing charges? Had to be a paid stunt.

    BTW, it looks like white powder is Kim’s Kryptonite against black microphones.

  29. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    turd da third
    Commented on this photo:

    What do you call a room full of huge ginourmous asses?

  30. Ahem…

    “KIM KARDASHIAN IS A FAT MOO-COW SLUT ON THE DEVIL’S OWN TV NETWORK, E!”

    That is all.

  31. Automagically, too, it seems.

    Moo-kow slut. E! suxxors.

  32. Colostomy Bag

    Someone should’ve told her you take off your clothes before you have an STD treatement powder applied.

  33. Hugh Jorgan

    Haha.

  34. Is it true that she walked off to get urinated on, so she could then eat the subsequent dough?

  35. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    KimK-Hater
    Commented on this photo:

    Fucking Awesome, too bad it wasn’t a damn hand-grenade!

    Fuck You Kim you waste of air, I can’t wait for you to meet Whitney in her present location you useless CUNT!

  36. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Mmmmgood
    Commented on this photo:

    She probably paid the bitch to do that. We havent heard from her in the news for like a week. boycott kimmmm

  37. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Commented on this photo:

    Her ass is so disgusting. It looks like an old women’s ass

  38. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Commented on this photo:

    Good god she’s so disgusting

  39. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Commented on this photo:

    Doesn’t she have the Penguin’s body from Batman. Her ass is seriously gross

  40. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Commented on this photo:

    Love those cheek implants, nose job, botox, lip injections, fake hair, fake tan, fake tits, fake teeth, FAKE ASS. She looks exactly like Cher with the body of The Penguin from Batman. Sick man.

  41. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Commented on this photo:

    Her face is morphing into a fookin monster

  42. dontlooknow

    The President has been shot! The President has been shot!

  43. Essa

    Harvey on TMZ thinks the Kardashians are a successful family seeking the American Dream…hence, he attacks Kris Humphries constantly and gives poor Kimmie the soft headlines. She called him to tell her tale of woe. Obviously, TMZ is team Kim. The woman cried when she lost an earring for God’s sake. If she had seriously been flour bombed, she would have been hysterical, not knowing what the substance was. Really Harvey is it worth it to have the Kardashians in your pocket. Disgusting.

    • Robb7

      Totally agree, Essa. TMZ is the K’s go-to “soft story” location. They’ve been banging on Kris H. for months — and Kim is just this poor, unfortunate lovely young girl — who’s 31+ years old, twice married and a cheating, lying whore who promoted HERSELF by releasing the sex tape WITH Ray J. They both bargained for millions on its release.

  44. twitter name is Tooke_real100

    omg this isshhh had me rolling when i read the description i though it was an actual four bomb that exploded now that would of been funnier… like why waist the flour though i could of made about 8 cookies with all that flour the economy is bad and my culinary class is not getting a lot of money for food…uggghhhh

  45. twitter name is Tooke_real100

    yo that was a waste of flour i could of made 8 cookies with that shit in this economy

  46. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    turd da third
    Commented on this photo:

    If that was lohan it would have been cocaine and not flour

  47. mike

    March 23: never forget

  48. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    squige
    Commented on this photo:

    hey kim k hater your mother dresses you funny

  49. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Sandra
    Commented on this photo:

    Your stupid! ^^^
    this woman is gorgeous!

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