Kim Kardashian‘s divorce immediately sparked numerous quips regarding gay marriage – most notably from Star Trek’s George Takei – because, seriously, marriage is supposed to be a life-long prison of internal loneliness and regret, not a get-rich quick scheme. Jerks. Anyway, turns out this week Congress is debating the Respect for Marriage Act which prompted Rev. Susan Russell to post an open letter to The Huffington Post that’s somehow both a sincere thanks and pure “fuck you” at the same time:
Seriously. As a marriage equality activist, I cannot thank you enough for your gift of the stunning example of how the gender of the couple saying “I do” clearly has absolutely nothing to do with respect for the institution of marriage. It is a gift — I promise you — that will keep on giving.
As we continue to work for family values that value all families and a protect-marriage movement that protects all marriages, we will have your example to add to Britney Spears’ 55-hour marriage, Larry King’s eight marriages and Newt Gingrich’s three (just to name a few) as proof positive that marriage needs protection, all right — but not from gay and lesbian couples who want to pledge to live together until death do them part.
… So thank you again, Kim. As we work without ceasing to secure for Alec and Jamie and their family the rights you and Kris threw away after 72 days of marriage, I hope you will know how deeply grateful we are for the “on a silver platter” gift you gave us this week as we head into Senate judiciary hearings on the Respect for Marriage Act and look ahead to the repeal of DOMA (Defense of Marriage Act). Honestly, we just can’t thank you enough.
Of course, the only drawback is that Kim is such a whore, she absolutely won’t hesitate to turn around and say, “Why, yes, I did it specifically for the gays,” to distract from all that lying she did about making a shit-ton of money. From there, we’ll later learn Kim’s wedding was clearly an attempt to stop unemployment, childhood obesity and the gum disease gingivitis. She’s a giver, you guys.
Photos: Splash News