Bald Kim Kardashian Twerks Kanye’s Fashion Show Hopin He’ll Chop Them Cakes

[Full Disclosure: Photo Boy and I spend 90% of our day in awe of Bossip’s headlines. This is our love story to them. – SW]

Here’s a balding Kim Kardashian in Paris last night for Kanye West’s fashion show because Amber Rose got a bunch of press saying they hooked up once, and like a good nomad whore, Kim goes where the publicity goes. On that note, some of you are going to suggest she only got an invite by agreeing to bang Kanye, but c’mon, the man’s a visionary. Clearly he decorates her ass like a throne, then makes her walk around with him sitting on it. “Oh, shit, that motherfucker is not using turquoise for them scarves. Yo, Kim, hang a left. LEFT. You know which direction left is? Damn, woman, don’t make me replace you with that Sasquatch thing O.J. left in your mom. I’ll shave a pair of moccasins right out of her fur. Dye that shit purple- whoa, hold up. Are those soft pretzels? East, butt-wagon!”

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN