Kiefer Sutherland’s attorney has issued a statement asserting Kiefer’s innocence in the alleged headbutting of fashion designer Jack McCollough last week. People reports
“We are troubled by the untruthful and self-serving information circulating regarding Kiefer Sutherland and events of last Monday evening,” lawyer Michael C. Miller said. “We are confident, however, that the investigation being conducted by the Manhattan District Attorney’s Office and the NYPD will confirm that Kiefer Sutherland was neither the instigator nor a wrongdoer in this incident.”
In a bizarre twist, and almost simultaneously with Kiefer’s statement, Brooke Shields is now backing his story and basically claiming her reps didn’t know what the hell they were talking about:
In a statement released Monday on behalf of Shields, her attorney Gerald Lefcourt, said, “A number of statements have been attributed to Ms. Shields in the media that are neither true nor authorized. These statements were obviously made by those who were not in attendance at the party and constitute their version of events.”
As for what happened at the party, the statement says, “While at the party she was bumped into by Jack McCollough and Kiefer Sutherland became concerned. Kiefer has always been a gentleman in her company. Both Jack and Kiefer are friends of Ms. Shields and she regrets this unfortunate situation.”
Obviously what’s happening here is a massive government conspiracy. Ten bucks says there was a bomb in Jack McCollough’s nose, and only Kiefer Sutherland’s head full of scotch could stop it. Which is exactly why I drive drunk everywhere; I love America.
Christina | May 11, 2009 at 3:15 pm
fist!
Famous Plastic | May 11, 2009 at 3:16 pm
Okayyyyy. So everyone saw him headbutt the guy, but now he didnt, because his lawyer said so….I love the justice system!
Jack | May 11, 2009 at 3:17 pm
WE’RE OUT OF TIME!!!
isn't Kiefer a dairy product? | May 11, 2009 at 3:19 pm
He seriously needs to come to Lindsay Lohan’s rescue…
Dick Cheney | May 11, 2009 at 3:24 pm
I see Ms. Shields came to her senses after a little waterboarding. Works wonders, regardless of what the fags say.
Tyler Perry | May 11, 2009 at 3:29 pm
Why didn’t he beat the shit out of that faggot Perez Hilton? Perez Hilton is spiteful because he’s a gay bottom who is fat and has the face of an ape. Gay marriage is an abomination and against God’s will. Gay’s who get married will burn extra crispy in hell for mocking God’s laws in addition to violating them.
uh-huh... | May 11, 2009 at 3:39 pm
#6, It sure is interesting that you know what a “gay bottom” is, and that you have paid close attention to Mr. Perez Hilton’s physical attributes…
methinks the Lady (after your screen names alter egos…) doth protest too much…
I wonder who your God hates more- gay people, or liars and hypocrites?
ROUGH--king of chat | May 11, 2009 at 3:52 pm
Hey reverend Ted Haggard=6? wrong post for your rant…
Hal | May 11, 2009 at 3:57 pm
If he admitted to it, even more of a hero to me – if I had a dollar for every fashion designer I wanted to headbutt, I’d be able to buy the second season of 24 on DVD.
Tyler Perry | May 11, 2009 at 4:07 pm
#7 God hates gays more then liars and hypocrites because at least they make an effort. As someone who appreciates beauty, ugliness in anything is very painful to view. Does it make me gay to know that Perez Hilton has the countenance and spite of a chimpanzee? Does it make me a faggot to know what a bottom is? When your wife takes it up the ass from her negro lover, is he or your wife a homosexual? OWNED!
RichPort's Ghost | May 11, 2009 at 4:09 pm
Whoever thinks he deserves prison time hates fredom.
At least, wait until the season finale.
Mr. Gibbels | May 11, 2009 at 4:10 pm
#10 Oh Snap! “uh-huh…” just got served
RichPort's Ghost | May 11, 2009 at 4:14 pm
#10 – I don’t have a dog in this fight, but what the fuck is with all the random sentences pieced together to resemble a paragraph?
Tyler Perry | May 11, 2009 at 4:23 pm
#13 You read it, right? LOL! Like you said, you don’t got no dog in this fight.
RichPort's Ghost | May 11, 2009 at 4:31 pm
#14 – I mean, I tried to read it, but all I got was fag, liar, kill, god, negro fucking your wife, owned. Is that about it?
mikeock | May 11, 2009 at 4:34 pm
Hey – you’re not really Jack Bauer.
Tyler Perry | May 11, 2009 at 5:15 pm
#15 Go back and read my posts if you suffer from poor reading comprehension. Jesus! They have night school for people like you. I can also recommend one of those after-school things like Sylvan Learning Centers.
Jennyjenjen | May 11, 2009 at 5:21 pm
@17 is that where you picked up your fine writing skills?
Ricky Bobby | May 11, 2009 at 5:29 pm
OJ said the head-butter is still out there…
Narcissist | May 11, 2009 at 5:42 pm
If Kiefer Sutherland headbutting people is wrong, I don’t wanna be right. That guy was in Lost Boys!
Pat C. | May 11, 2009 at 6:46 pm
Of course, once again the media isn’t getting Brooke Shield’s statement directly; just from another person who wasn’t there who is speaking for her. So maybe Lefcourt is wrong also.
Jason Benedict | May 11, 2009 at 8:52 pm
As far as I’ve known, Kiefer doesn’t fuck around.
gerard vandenberg | May 12, 2009 at 12:57 am
UNLESS HE WANTS A PENIS IN HIS ASS AGAIN, folks!!
RichPort's Ghost | May 12, 2009 at 7:59 am
#17 – You’re a bible thumpin’, promise keepin’, bathroom stall visitin’ foot tapper, aren’tcha? My three year old has better arguments over juice boxes than you’re doing now. Night school? Classic. Comedy is in your future.
Yeah | May 12, 2009 at 6:07 pm
#6, #10, #14, #17- It’s okay to admit that you are gay. There is nothing to be ashamed of.
Mr. Gibbels | May 12, 2009 at 6:12 pm
@25- Oh Snap! #6, #10, #14, #17 just got served
Puppeteer | May 12, 2009 at 6:14 pm
hahahah #4
hahahah
teacher | May 12, 2009 at 6:38 pm
Hey, #14-
Mr. Perfect Reading Comprehension,
You certainly do have nice syntax with the “don’t got no dog” phrase.
People who live in glass houses shouldn’t throw stones.
Toad.