Khloe Kardashian offers DUI advice to Shia LaBeouf (I bet it involves French fries.)

July 30th, 2008 // 58 Comments

Khloe Kardashian is now considered a receptacle for advice on drinking and driving after her three hour stint in jail. I’d say that qualifies her to dish out horribly vapid pearls of wisdom for recently arrested Shia LaBeouf which, oh, hey, that’s exactly what she did. Fantastic! Us Magazine reports:

“Just be smarter,” she told at the Annual Style L.A. Runway show benefitting the Facial Paralysis Foundation & Stop the Violence/Face the Music benefit.
“Think about your actions and get a driver!” the 24-year-old counseled. “It’s so much cheaper in the long run!”

“So much cheaper.” Interesting. How about, I dunno, nobody gets fucking killed? I mean, I guess that’s as important as saving a couple bucks. Then again, I don’t spend the majority of each day in a mansion with my sister trying to block the sun with our asses, so I could be wrong.


  1. Always nice to see an “expert” giving advice!

  2. Buttman

    I like the last picture

  3. Lindsays

    She is my favorite. Just saw her on milllionaire personals site “”"”"W e a l t h y R o m a n c e. co m”"”"”" last week. I am wondering what kind of relationship she is looking for on that site.Is she single again now?

  4. whynot

    she also gave advise on DO’S and DONT’S of sleeping with Bigfoot. Apparently he likes his women a little smaller and a little more feminine.

  5. Jumpin_J

    So sayeth the Yeti.

    And #3 Lindsays, suck me.

  6. tp

    Eeew, thunder thighs!!!

  7. lindsays an idiot

    searching the internet looking for a place to place an “ad” for your website is a little lame. Plus no one is saying “she is my favorite.” Or is wondering if she is single. I would think with that kind of advertising you would turn people away, you idiot.

  8. Mighty

    I can already see her as a MADD spokesperson threatening to pull a “Mandible claw” wrestling move on ur ass if you DUI!


  9. BigJim

    “Just be smarter.”

    Bwa ha ha ha ha!

    Sage advice to soooo many celebutards.

    Hey, Britney: Just be smarter!

    Hey, Paris: Just be smarter!

    Hey, coked up Winehouse slut: Just be smarter!

    Hey, brainless buckets of cunt fungus who come on here to promote their lame ass websites that no one gives a shit about and will NEVER visit: Just be smarter!

  10. whynot

    in the last pic we almost get to see the penis.

  11. Jacqueline W. Silberman

    Nice beaver.

  12. Deacon Jones

    I find myself, oddly enough, turned on by these pics. But then again, that’s not saying much…

  13. vg902

    love those big,thick n juicy legs .. Ummmmm

  14. Cowboy Bob

    She is as ugly as a mud fence!

  15. Please

    @ #3 – Please pull a Robert Soloway.

  16. Jesus, those are some ham hocks!

  17. Cattyluo

    Her hot pictures were found on *****M i l l i o n a i r****—-It is said she drinks for a young man.If you want to know who it is ,you can go and see on the site.

  18. whynot

    hey #17, go f_ ck yourself. in fact i will not go to your site, ever. and learn language.

  19. Vince Lombardi

    JEEZUS!!! Forrest Gregg didn’t have thighs that big! If I’d had this girl on my ’66 team on the O-line, we’d have gained 300 rushing yards on the Chiefs in the Super Bowl.

  20. rough daddy

    That is one big girl,,,id still trash that ass….

  21. BeanBag

    I wonder how big her penis is. She should could play linebacker too. Maybe practice with reggie and the mud shark.

  22. Fat Chicks Suck

    She is massive

  23. Sally Struthers

    Just one of her thighs could feed an entire village in Africa.

  24. poon tang

    it’s tough being the ugly sister.


  25. You want a dumb(I’m the sister of) faking celebrity who thinks she’s an important prostitute now.
    - don’t look any further:

  26. Tavern Guy

    Please dude, don’t be a pawn in their game. Nobody wants to see anything about Chloe Kardashian. She’s a linebacker with a mug like a Saint Bernard. Spare us the misery.

  27. Jackie

    What a waste of skin.

  28. A-1

    I think she has nice legs. It’s better than bony ass legs and knees. I wonder how many of you knocking her for being fat are probably fat yourselves?

  29. Dr. Phil

    You’ll have to go on anti-cholesterol drugs if you lick her pussy.

  30. jag

    My favorite Kardashian has always been Kourtney…she eats less fries and looks smokin’ in a bikini…okay, I’ll give you a pic:

  31. grossssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss

    Thank you fish for that commentary. These fucking Aholes are so self absorbed that to them the consequences of drunk driving are that it costs them money when they get caught, even when they kill someone it’s all about the money. I really don’t fucking understand why so many people don’t seem to get how fucking disgusting it is to drive drunk. The fact that you want to drive your shitbox is worth killing people??? That kind of evil, selfish, fucking idiocy makes me want to vomit our my organs. The only way to teach these fucking bitchass celebrities is to lock them away for life and keep them from their pampered lives and designer shit, that is the only way to punish them. Because even if they killed themselves driving drunk their asswads Hollywood peers and fucking assistants would treat them like victims.

    Thankfully this hermaphrodite bitch whore is fat, ugly as sin and proof that chewbacka’s evil ex girlfriend lives among us. I hear he dumped her because her vage smelled like rotten cabbbage and moldy chedder and that her body hair was as thick as copper wire especially on her nipples.
    Not that having to wake up every morning and shave your whole body with a custom made machetti razor is punishment enough for this hideous garguatuan beast, but it’s better than nothing. Apparently she creates so much raw sewage that the governemnt picks it up by the tractor trailor load and ships it to farms in dryer climates. So the fruit and veggies you eat today have likely been grown in soil fertilized by Miss. Big Foots ass porridge.

  32. wanks

    hahaha wtf? she is a nobody, at least he has a promising acting career and SHE’S giving HIM advice…dumb skank!

  33. whynot

    you could make 2 Joe Dirt suits out of her skin.

  34. She is such a waste of space.

  35. boo

    #34. And she sure takes up a lot of it.

  36. Clem


  37. That is the biggest transvestite I have ever seen…

  38. JimmyBachaFungool

    Her thighs have to be 62″ around each. For having a very hot sister (Kim) and a very cute sister (Kourtney), she is way too amazon. Bruce Jenner is seriously more feminine than her.

  39. Sarah

    My gosh, those legs in the last 2 pics. One of her huge legs weighs more than I do!

  40. Miserable Bastard

    If my plane crashed in the Andes I’d want her in the seat next to me.

  41. Milk Cow with 200 pound legs (each)

    “…She’s a linebacker …”

    Linebackers are athletic, active and muscular. This thing pictured couldn’t play one down without gasping for breath. She looks like she’s never had a workout; she probably never will. Probably waiting for a monkey a fraction of her size with a perverted attraction to walruses and giant seals to come along and fall head over heals for her.

    She’s as gross and pathetic as her skank sisters are.

  42. NY Ted

    Hmmm…just wondering…are all the Kardashian women built like big black NFL Middle Linebackers…???

  43. Robin

    Holy-Sheep-Shit Batman !!

    Are ALL those Kardasian whores, morphadite amazons ??

  44. Fuck this and Fuck you

    Why do you report on this disgusting pig and the rest of the trash people in her family?

  45. nancy

    khloe is my favorite of the kardashian sisters. i like her attitude.

  46. kate

    COOL,! A friend of mine recommended me a HOT place ***”NYwealthyMatch .c o m *** It’s a place full of hot stuff and also a place where the rich & celebrity have romance!

  47. <3

    I never knew how FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT klhoe was! ewwwwww-just look at those massssive thgis of ehrs! I mean wat does she do at the gym-eat more french fries? her legs are soooo big

  48. <3

    I never knew how FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT klhoe was! ewwwwww-just look at those massssive thighs of hers! I mean wat does she do at the gym-eat more french fries? her legs are soooo big

  49. Hfire3

    Just eat smarter………..and kudos to #31…….thats what a rant is supposed to look like.

  50. Dying Republic

    This nation has deteriorated whereby money will buy you anything including the law. If you have no money justice will not be served. Same old same old. Return to the feudal system for us. Seems the way the human mind is hardwired anyway so don’t complain.
    This lady is superior to you because her family is wealthy.

Leave A Comment