Khloe Kardashian Kissed Beyonce’s Ass For Kim

April 26th, 2012 // 70 Comments
Not Ready For This Jelly
Kim Kardashian Kanye West
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[Ed. Note: Most beautiful woman in the world, folks. – SW]

Posted by Photo Boy

Since Beyonce‘s friends practically tripped over themselves getting the word out ASAP that Kim Kardashian will get beaten with a fake baby before she’s ever in the same room as Gwyneth Paltrow‘s black friend, Khloe Kardsahian has apparently come to her sister’s defense by shamelessly blowing sunshine up Beyonce’s ass presumably while Kris Jenner waves a raw steak in front of her face. Via Twitter:

Beyonce really is so stunning! She looks flawless in People magazine. Great article… She’s so in love :)

While it may seem like she’s trying to make Beyonce think that her family isn’t the epicenter of whore-creation and all that is terrible and dark in this universe, I see it as aligning herself with the enemy or at least trying to score a spot in Beyonce and Jay-Z’s panic bunker for when the anti-matter emerges from Kim’s ass and blinks us out of existence. Don’t believe me? Here’s Khloe literally saying she’d let Kim drown given the choice between her and Kourtney. And even that may seem like an innocent anecdote, but considering the fact that she’s willing to deal with a lifetime of this over her own blood reveals a twisted hatred that, God willing, will Sasquatch-maul the entire family to death.

Photo: Splash News

superficial

  1. Beyonce No Make Up
    Jean-Mi
    Commented on this photo:

    Who’s that guy?

  2. GilmoreGirl

    Of course she looks flawless in the magazine…it’s called Photoshop. Something the Kardashians are VERY familiar with!!

    • hehe

      yes the kuntdashrightins are but bey is naturally flawless like that moustache on your face and the hair on your back

  3. Deacon Jones

    “I don’t always go out in public without makeup, but when I do, I prefer to look like a rodeo clown”

    -The Most Beautiful Woman in the World

  4. Ripley's Believe It Or Not.

    That’s the kind of face Chris Brown would go to town on.

  5. Deacon Jones

    She literally looks like one of the black tranny prostitutes on craigslist.

  6. Jonas Grumby

    “All The Ugly Ladies,” by Beyonce ‘Sackhead’ Knowles, Official Beautiful Woman

    If you liked it, then you shoulda put a bag on it
    If you liked it, then you shoulda put a bag on it
    Don’t be mad once you see its ugly as shit
    If you liked it, then you shoulda put a bag on it
    Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

  7. Buck

    khloe can kick anyone’s ass…be careful Beyonce

  8. cc

    Oh look, it’s the homely girl from grade 5.

  9. of course she looks good in people magazine. please airbrush me everyday after getting styled by the best in the industry.

  10. TheListener

    She looks fine without makeup, but she has way, way too much blonde hair on her head. It kind of looks like a lion’s mane. That’s not right.

  11. Beyonce No Make Up
    Donald Duck
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s the hottest woman on the planet /sarcasm

  12. kiki

    the f was this article even about??

  13. FDrBn

    I’m starting to think this site is run by the Kardashian ‘klan to keep their 15 minutes from fading.
    Granted I’m giving them a lot of credit assuming they’re capable of stringing sentences together…

    • Blech

      No way. The Kardashians get shat on everyday on this site, and I think only one Kardashian actually enjoys it.

  14. lcthewolf

    who ever wrote this is an ass hole!

  15. Beyonce No Make Up
    Peter
    Commented on this photo:

    big penis

  16. Beyonce No Make Up
    Kir
    Commented on this photo:

    Just because you were given the sexiest woman in the world or whatever title doesn’t give you the right to all of a sudden bare it all and still be super-confident looking like an untamed lion. Just my opinion. Would she have gone out sans make-up/untamed hair and a big smile if she wasn’t given that title? Maybe she would have but not with a big smile. Most celebrities in their without make-up pics look either angry or like they just want to go hide somewhere.

    • Panty model

      Just because someone said something nice about you, doesn’t mean that you get to go outside without make up on!! Jesus, Beyonce, you are still a woman. Remember your place!

  17. tlmck

    Keenan Thompson is the most beautiful woman in the world?

  18. What we have here is the missing link in the family tree that would make Tiger Woods related to Chris Brown.

  19. dooood

    droids don’t pull people’s arms out of their sockets when they lose.
    wookies are known to do that.

  20. Beyonce No Make Up
    Commented on this photo:

    [img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/04/26/Robert+Plant+Robert-340_295.jpg[/img]

  21. Beyonce No Make Up
    Caseum
    Commented on this photo:

    The most beautiful girl in planet Photoshop….

  22. vekfan

    she looks like a homeless meth addict!

  23. judging you

    Gah! Looks like a man! Dave Mustaine, that’s who she looks like…only black.

  24. anonym

    so much fucking photoshop over makeup.

    it’s a sham

  25. just say'n

    What is Fish’s obsestion with these whores?

  26. Beyonce No Make Up
    Blech
    Commented on this photo:

    Clearly she looks like any girl I went to high school with here.

    But to be honest, she looks better without make-up on than many female celebrities.

    • Yeahhhf7

      The girls I went to highschool with were way hotter than her and hardly wore any make up. I saw one the other day and she just keeps getting prettier and its even more natural now. Doesn’t even dye her hair.
      Its only because Beyonce is a celebrity and they are trying to hype her up as if she’s above the normal person walking around but it doesn’t mean its true. I see prettier girls everyday, prettier girls who don’t need anything to make themselves that. Beyonce and almost every other celebrity has many people working into making them into something subhuman and its all hype because in the end they’re just human and most celebrities are really insecure humans, that’s why they need to lie to themselves to receive attention.
      I mean, its all lie, all of them. The models, the actresses, even the dudes. Its all hype. They’re all average and some way below average but people just see them as something more because of the screen, magazines or songs.

  27. I wonder how much Jay Z paid them to declare her the most beautiful woman in the world to get her confidence back up after she was feeling fat due to her fake pregnancy.

  28. Gayle

    Hmm, racists pigs who I’m sure are just as ugly as you purport Beyonce to be…sad a black woman can’t even get a compliment without racists others getting all up in arms! BTW, all women, including your ugly wives, create an outer illusion of beauty (whether it’s makeup, clothes, hair, etc). LOL

    • Smapdi

      u r fat

    • Racist pigs…??? The posters here are racist pigs because they disagree that she is the most beautiful woman worldwide? I’ve seen nothing here indicating racism other than your whimpering protest. It’s just as racist to say Beyonce is the most beautiful woman in the world if you’re saying it simply because she’s black.

    • aly

      I’m latina but I have noticed black people to be the most racist. They will openly make fun of white people and think its okay because they are black.
      Many black people think they can get away with things just because they are black. Yet they go and say rude things about white people and every time someone says something a about a person and that person is black, it immediately makes them racist.
      No one plays more with racism than black people.

    • Mr. Ed

      Fat Gayle is right in what she typed with her thick, sausage-like fingers. Culture, including beauty standards, is defined by those in power, aka white people. Those following the over-culture thus tend to devalue and diminish beauty standards of subcultures, and since culture tends to parallel race, this is by its nature a racist act. That is why you are racist for not glorifying Beyonce’s beauty, why are guilty of things you think you didn’t do, and why it is racist for you to claim you aren’t racist. See how that works? What, you can’t think your way out of that one? That’s too bad. That guilt you feel is the fruit of your own silliness, but if it will make you feel better, go buy Beyonce’s People magazine.

      • huknow

        Really????? this has NOTHING to do with race. I know many black girls that are way better looking than beyonce, same way there are hispanic girls way prettier than j.lo and asians better than lucy liu. Just cus ur famous doesn’t make u more gorgeous than the rest of the population of women. I am nof famous but I have eyes and can see hotter chicks all over that aren’t being shoved down my throat.

      • blahblahstfu

        If you want a beautiful black woman got to Eritrea, if you want a beautiful asian girl go to east asia. If you want a beautiful hispanic girl go to south america. Hell you could go to somewhere in south america and find a beautiful black, asian, hispanic and even a hot white chick (they have someone for everyone there)
        A beautiful woman who will wake up and go to sleep looking pretty because she’s just naturally pretty and doesn’t have a full on hair and make up team.
        These titles are silly though because beauty is really in the eye of the beholder.

  29. JQUERY IS NOT A FUNCTION.

    now that she paid people magazine a few mil to proclaim her the most beautiful woman ever in the world beyonce can throw all her makeup in the garbage because-
    she never really wore any makeup ever ever anyway!!!!!!!!
    its true!!!!!!!!

  30. Burt

    Oh, my. They are so fake. Don’t they have any shame?

  31. Joaquin ingles

    Shit, what next? Michelle Obama becomes Playmate of the Year?

  32. Joaquin ingles

    “My mom says I look like a lion. My real name is Roy. When I was a kid I liked to rock back in the crib so they called me Rocky.”

  33. Beyonce No Make Up
    Herman Bumfudle
    Commented on this photo:

    hey, beautiful mama. you look so beautiful in love. uuumm! delicious.

  34. fupeoplemag

    JayZ done knocked her cross-eyed! That plus hips you could balance a beer on each side…fucking gross. FU People Magazine, just straight trolling.

  35. Beyonce No Make Up
    Elin's caddy
    Commented on this photo:

    Why am I seeing Tiger Woods with a really bad weave?

  36. Beyonce No Make Up
    RUBENS
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude…DUDE!!!
    what the hell? this can’t be for real!
    if this is real I’m a better looking woman than Beyonce myself…and I’m a man O_o

  37. Beyonce No Make Up
    WHATAFUCK
    Commented on this photo:

    Okay what the fuck I’m 100% positive this second picture was photoshoped, she has the exact same face neck and hair from the previous picture only tilted a bit to the side

  38. Beyonce No Make Up
    WHATAFUCK
    Commented on this photo:

    There you go my proof it’s photoshopped
    http://desmond.imageshack.us/Himg696/scaled.php?server=696&filename=semttulomjo.png&res=landing

    I’m not saying Beyonce doesn’t look horible (cuz she does GODAMN) but whoever sold you guys that picture, ripped you guys off

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