Khloe Kardashian: ‘Airport Securty is Like Rape’

December 7th, 2010 // 76 Comments

BEAR RAPE. Something she knows all too much about. From being in this photo.

Because we are at our most lost without the sage guidance of the fabled “Sésquac,” Khloe Kardashian has thrown its hat into the TSA debate and equated airport security with rape on Lopez Tonight. RadarOnline reports:

“Well, they basically are just raping you in public,” she said. ” I got asked the other day, do you want to go for a screening or get patted down. I don’t want that X-Ray to see everything, honey.
“But the people are so aggressive. It’s like, ‘Chill out, you didn’t find anything on me yet, calm down. They say, ‘OK, I’m going to be patting you down and I’m going to be touching the crease of your ass.’ That is so inappropriate.”

Okay, first off, beasts of burden aren’t allowed on flights. You have to them checked. Second, if the TSA really did want to check Khloe Kardashian’s ass for terrorists, they clearly mistook her for Kim which she shouldn’t pretend hasn’t always been her life-long, innermost dream. Seriously, no one’s going to begrudge her for wanting to walk down the street and just once hear, “Hey, it’s the big ass one!” instead of the usual cries to alert the game warden. We all have feelings.

Photos: Splash News


  1. Yes, it is the equivalent.
    It is exactly the same as being raped in public.

    • qwerty

      Yeah.Rapists touch your arms,boobs,thighs,say “thank you” and…NEXT!

      • nonminti

        I do agree with qwerty,I would not use term ‘rape’ since I don’t know then how real rape you should call. A too strong word… but some touching is really too firm,therefore,umm the touching isn’t that Ok :)

    • She is an idiot and actual rape victims now hate her more.

  2. RoboZombie

    HA HA! I can see the TSA now…”Shit, here comes Khloe Kardashian…make the new guy pat her down!”

  3. Facebook me

    She should consider it an HONOR that someone other than her own husband, would want to touch that thing in a suggestive manner.

    AND we all know the three of your have implants. Who the fuck cares if TSA sees your bags?!

  4. Peter Pantsless

    She has to buy three seats, right?

  5. Vandal

    I’d fuck that. I’d want her to punch fuck out of my bollocks during. I want to die of snoo snoo.

  6. molly

    “usual cries to alert the game warden.”

    and i jizzed in my pants

  7. rough nation

    This could’ve been funny if the bears didn’t look like they were just released from a concentration camp…

  8. Oh snap

    She is just cared that they’ll see or feel her penis.

  9. Khloe Kardashian
    Commented on this photo:

    She is a grizzly.

  10. Mena

    Nice photo update!

  11. McFeely Smackup

    This will be interesting to see unfold.

    If Bill O’reilly had said this exact same thing, femenists would already be erecting the gallows to string him up on because it’s so incredibly insensitive to rape victims. I’ve got a funny feeling nobody is going to say shit about Khloe though.

    • Meredith

      People will say he’s a half-wit moron. Very much like O’Reilly and people of his ilk.

    • Fear

      O’Reilly is a pig who himself verbally molested a woman without repurcussion because money is power is justice. In what is left here.
      Get ready for worse times than just this folks, the fun is just beginning for the masses of peasents and lesser than Elites.\
      Now make a retarded rebuttal someone on the right, please.

      • McFeely Smackup

        I’ll step in for the “retarded rebuttal” and just say:


      • Fear

        McFeelyourself, I guess living in and increasingly fascist society is fine when you are a foul mouthed idiot. Walmart now is playing along with Homeland Security, noctice? Alot sure has changed this last decade.
        Of course, you haven’t noticed.

      • McFeely Smackup

        walmart did what?

        When you come down off the meth, can you…ah, never mind, we both know you’re not gonna come down off the meth.

  12. FattyFatty2X4

    That pic is my new screen saver, thanx Fish

  13. First things first, I highly doubt any TSA security personnel used the term “ass”. Not that “blubber mounds” would have been more accurate. Simply, they are paid to be professional and I’m very sure there was a thorough training meeting over the terms which are appropriate.

    Secondly, you stupid fucks wanted to feel safe on planes. You were scared to fly (even though counting the 9/11 deaths and random plane crashes, flying is still statistically safer than driving). They safe-guarded the gates so terrorists WITHOUT plane tickets couldn’t get passed them. You bitched about that because now junior can’t see your plane taxi down the tarmac. So they randomly searched people based on a lottery-esque pick and pull. You bitched about that because you have a tan so they MUST be profiling. They banned bringing moderate to large quantities of liquid on to prevent explosives. You bitched about that because now you can’t bring that $7 bottle of Dasani on the plane and you are going to have to buy a $7 bottle of Dasani from the flight attendant if you get thirsty. Oh, wait. NOW you are mad because they are thoroughly patting EVERYONE down or, in lieu of that, you can get a big, bad X-ray done. What the fuck are you mad about now?? Its either: the most action you’ll get since your honeymoon OR less toxic than the fucking botox you might as well be drinking in a dry martini. Fuck off, you fuckin’ fucks!

    • The Ghost of Kanye

      Well said!

    • spoonicorn

      @snarky You’re a fucking moron. People are upset because they realize it’s all SMOKE AND MIRRORS. Someone, if inclined, would STILL be able to smuggle explosives on board, even after going through the scanner. Yet, if you refuse the zap, which is useless to begin with, you’re subjected to a love pat by a TSA worker who treats folks like cattle and is unaccountable, while those being treated like cattle are writing their checks! Everyone knows this…well, everyone who gets their news from outlets other than celebrity blogs.

      • Here we go spoonicorn…jsut because you spend a little time on the Anarchist’s Daily or you smoked a doobie to some Hendrix in the 90′s with some lesbians, does not make you “informed”. Of course it’s smoke and mirrors, you fucktard. But, PLEASE, tell us all what you would have the TSA do? I mean, I don’t see your fat, socially inept ass getting out of your mom’s basement and applying for an intel or security position with Homeland Security.

        Now, I don’t purport to have any answers either, but what I DID rant about up there was America’s inability to jsut be happy enough. They wanted the changes. They got the changes. Now they want it back the old way. Fuckin’ grow the fuck up people!

      • spoonicorn

        “they wanted the changes” Since when? The TSA taking over airport security was overreach to begin with, and now, after almost 10 years with nothing to show for it (not ONE thwarted attack thanks to airport “security” measures), what do you expect? Of course, security at the airports had to be tightened after 9/11. But, it’s been shown to be a farce. Israel went through the same process, and they now have privatized security in their airports. We need to head in that direction.
        You agree that it’s smoke and mirrors. So why on earth would you support it? You want billions of tax dollars to go towards a program that does not work, is intrusive and borderline abusive, with no recourse for those who are subjected to it [again, for NO GOOD REASON], and I’m the fucktard???
        To answer your question, I would have the TSA get the hell out of the airport security business altogether. It’s a joke, but no one is laughing.

    • THANK YOU @snarkyscreenname!

      I’m glad *someone* can see what is actually happening!

      Don’t be bothered by the flamers that are now going to flock to this well written post, they just want a piece of the intelligence and common sense…even if they take it the wrong way.

      • Internet Tough Guys Losers

        LOL @ typical Internet Tough Guy crap from “snarkyscreenname.” Guy’s probably 100 pounds soaking wet in real life, which is why he has to put on this stupid bravado.

      • DragonSkat

        @Internet No doubt. And how about the sentiment? I can just hear it now: Germany in the early ’30s. “snarkyscreenname” on the SS rounding up anyone without an armband: “You fuckin’ fucks asked for this, and now you don’t want it?? Our fuhrer made the trains run on time, can’t you just be happy enough??”

    • nonminti

      I especially like the last line of the post :)

      • McFeely Smackup

        I agree with spoonicorn, we should do like they do in israel.

        Racially profile people when they fly, pre-screen all passengers with intrusive background checks, and basically treat the airport like a police state complete with military guards with automatic weapons.

        right….that’s what you want. You don’t just want to whine and complain because it’s the cause celeb of the moment. You actually have intelligent opinions to offer right?

        Funny how people seem to miss the fact that the TSA patdowns are VOLUNTARY, you always have the option of going through the body scanner instead. You know, that thing that takes pornographic photos of you…if you think it’s pornographic to be rendered in semi-transparent, hairless and foggy indistinct black and white images.

        Half of you people are retarded. The other half are people who just like to complain and don’t care about things like facts. Well, fine with me…you bitch and moan all you like and post youtube videos of TSA employees acting like professionals while dealing with douchebags, and I’ll proceed through the scanner and get to my flight on time.

      • lot lizard

        @McFeely, re: Israel

        “pre-screen all passengers with intrusive background checks” – I think most folks would prefer this to the window-dressing that’s going on in US airports now. You can agree contractually to a background check when you buy your ticket; when the government takes over whether you like it or not, you’re stuck with whatever tactic they come up with to make it *look* like they’re doing something. The scanners are a SHAM, and so are the pat-downs.
        Profiling *is* the answer. Just ask anyone who works security at a Vegas casino. They don’t waste their time hassling those who would never dream of cheating. They’re trained to spot those who will.
        “the TSA patdowns are VOLUNTARY, you always have the option of going through the body scanner instead.” – WRONG. They’re not voluntary for millions who are pregnant, with prosthesis, artificial heart, etc. And, they’re useless, and an abuse of gov’t power. It’s a SEARCH WITHOUT REASONABLE DOUBT, which may not be a big deal to you, since apparently, you’re cool with strange high-school dropouts bumping it with the back of their hand, if you’re lucky. Your average schlub is being treated as a suspect, and a terror risk, when we all know where terror comes from. Radical Muslims, and Michael Moore. Profile them, and leave grandma with the fake hip alone!
        And speaking of missing facts – how about the fact that the scanner and patdowns have yielded nothing. It’s total bullshit. The underwear bomber would still be sitting on the plane had he tried that shit now, for instance.
        Yet, our esteemed president wants to UNIONIZE the TSA!!! [wonder why?]
        But hey, the government knows best. We should all just literally bend over and take it. Right, “McFeely?”

    • mcfeely smackup

      Actually Lot Lizard, I do agree with you. Profiling IS a valid and reasonable response to security, but I don’t believe for a second that the people doing the complaining would be any happier with that solution than any others. They just like complaining, and this bandwagon is a-rolling!

      As to the scanners being “useless”, you’re either misinformed or deliberately spreading false information. Pregnant women are NOT prohibited from using the scanners, nor are people with prosthetics. In fact, the TSA recommends people with prosthetics DO use the full body scanners because it’s quicker and more convenient for them. I know, you probably read otherwise on some anti-TSA website.

    • Alexandra Hemale

      Agreed with Snarky,

      This is what happens when people want their safety and their freedom all in one cute little package. It doesn’t work that way. The people who whine about airport security are the same ones who would be whining about their safety (or lack of it) if they found out some nut successfully smuggled a bomb on board the plane they’re riding in.

      Pick one. Either you get a pat down, or you take a risk of bad people getting bad stuff, and doing bad things with it, on planes.

    • Snarky is on point. People would complain no matter WHAT was done. Start profiling and people would scream racism. Privatize security at airports and people would want to know who was in control and what standards were in place to ensure each security company was performing their role properly. Others would start suing the private companies left and right. If guards held machine guns people would call airports military states.

      To those comparing airport security measures and what Snarky’s post said to the Nazi’s and him to SS soldier, you are idiots. The Nazi’s and their SS were the biggest proponents of racial profiling in the history of mankind. What the TSA is doing now is the complete opposite of that, so that comparison is completely bogus. As for the half Iranian womans post regarding skin tone etc, I agree. Terrorists aren’t going to LOOK like terrorists. They aren’t going to have traditional muslim clothing, facial hair, etc. How soon we forget Timothy McVeigh who was whiter than John McCain. Not all terrorists are going to be muslim, which is why racial profiling doesn’t work.

      • I’d like to cease the argument that TSA personnel are HS dropouts and thus not qualified to pat you down. While a portion of the people who are commenting on this site are retail/fast food managers and employees, TSA has a rigorous screening process for their employees which requires a HS diploma or equivalent (for those of you who were home-schooled) as well as pass a credit check with no more than $7000 in negative credit. I doubt they are hiring from your current list of co-workers at the Shake n Steak.

        And to the chode who believes that I am a nerd of a hundred pounds: believe what you will.

        The Israeli screening process is no better than ours. If we hadn’t done all that whining and complaining in search of a false sense of security, then TSA wouldn’t be forced to pat everyone down or scan them. The smoke and mirrors isn’t a ruse put on by the government in order to pretend they are doing something, spoonicorn. The smoke and mirrors are to establish that sense of security that Americans so desperately cried out for post-9/11. We weren’t getting on planes and we wanted to know that we wouldn’t get flown into the Seattle Space Needle, so here we are, nearly ten years later happily lining up to pretend we are any less at risk of a terrorist attack. Its STILL us. Its still every-man that has created the problem that we begged for a solution to and now WHINE about having to live with. We made this bed, why wont you people just shut the fuck up an sleep in it?

  14. josh

    Fish ! Khloe is not a bear, if that is what you are suggesting ! I protest ! Khloe is obviously from bigfoot, sasquatch or yeti ascendant, you should revise your zoology lessons !

    • You meant “descent” there. I’m not flaming, just trying to help you out a little. “Ascendant” is pretty much only used in astrology and has something to do with the rising sign or blah blah blah.

  15. Maplewood

    She also said that seeing Conan in “jeggings” (jean/leggings) made her feel raped. Now, I’m not advocating anyone commit forcible beastiality on her, but maybe she just doesn’t know what rape really involves.

    • nonminti

      true.And I hope she wouldn’t have to find out,just could stop using it.

    • argleblargle

      I was gonna bring that up. Glad I wasn’t the only one that heard it. She just likes to throw around the word “rape” for attention. All of the Kardashians are such disgusting, vapid trash, but Khloe is probably the dumbest of them all.

      To quote Buster from Arrested Development: “Yeah, like anyone would want to ‘R’ her”

  16. Saying our own safety precautions is rape is kinda like…

    …being so terrified of someone coming into your bedroom at night and raping your ass, you set up a device that will rape THEM if they try to come in. One night, you forget about the device and go to get a glass of water. Upon coming back to your room you, yourself, get raped. The person who may have been the one to come after, is now rofling so hard he/she no longer cares.

    • safety precautions *are rape…

      • DragonSkat

        Yeah, yeah, it’s just like that…yeah. Get back to us when the opiates wear off.

      • @Skat

        Aw, how cute, a troll who thinks he’s clever.

        And no drugs btw, just heavy sleep deprivation due to it being finals season in the college world. Staying up every night coding does have effects similar to drugs though. It could be why all the hard working nerdy kids are so frickin weird.

  17. Shit’s going to REALLY hit the fan when they screen her picnic basket.

  18. Livinus Nwambe

    That banner pic made me lol all over myself.

  19. anonymous

    In her defense, Khloe did tell the TSA agent that she didn’t have the droids they were looking for but they still refused to let her carry her bowcaster on the airplane.

  20. argleblargle

    I’m nearly convinced that Khloe keeps saying stupid shit and leaving her mouth wide open in hopes that someone will shove a burger in there in order to shut her up and make her go away. Obviously it’s a tactic that has worked all to well for her.

  21. Khloe Kardashian
    Commented on this photo:

    Khloe looks like she lost some weight in this picture

  22. McFeely Smackup

    If we say TSA security is like rape, then the rapists have already won.

  23. fester

    If an airline loses a Kardashian’s luggage does that mean their ass winds up in a different city?

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  25. Billy Seatsniffer

    Founded in 2010, The Bigfoot Rapist Organization (BRO) is now the oldest and largest organization of ti’s kind – a virtual community of inbred rednecks, trailer park dwellers, and adults recovering from acquired brain injuries. The unique individuals who compose the BRO are engaged in one project, and one only: Find bigfoot and rape him! As a result of BRO educating the public on it’s membership and goals, BRO is widely considered as the least credible xeno-rape oriented group in the nation.

    Contact the BRO: Phone 1-900-BIG-RAPE

  26. Brooke

    Rape rape rape… the word is MOLEST. “Airport security is molesting poor passengers” etc etc. I really hate when people throw the word rape around. Unless it something like “Last Friday totally raped my ass with a stick.”

    I have to fly to the US next week… I’m a little concerned about getting scanned because they don’t have that here and I still don’t entirely know what people mean by nakey scan-scan fun time, so I’ll have to check that out since I’d rather be x-rayed with a magic gun than be patted down (or raped, or molested, or whatever).

    And on racial profiling and why it doesn’t work for terrorism: I’m half Iranian, but I look about as white as they come. There are plenty of people who hate America who could pass as a “typical American”, so just stopping guys with big thick beards and ethnic clothing isn’t going to be the best way to go. Terrorists will work around it. Instead, let’s just hope Batman and Superman come to life and save us all.

    • Garth Foster Brooks


      unlike most people, why don’t you do a little research about the scanners before getting too worked up about them. A simple google search for “full body scanner” will give you examples of what images look like. If that’s what you think of as involuntarily being forced to do hardcore porn, then rethink your trip.

  27. Angelica

    First Kristen Stewart compared getting her pic taken by paps to be raped and know Khloe has to talk stupid too? When will these stupid broads learn to compare shit right like sayin something like “Airport security is like be felt up on the subway..” something that happens to tons of people that isnt as harsh as saying you got raped man these chicks or ignorant to the world and the shit that comes out of there mouths….

  28. LJ

    So she’s a famewhore and an asshole.

  29. shes just pissed off because a white guy might touch her.

  30. wim

    you’re safe….THEY ONLY RAPE WOMEN.
    NO COWS!!!

  31. Jason

    So which pic has the bear in it?

  32. McFeely My Anus

    Bill O’Reilly gives me personal advice on vibrators. True story! Side note, I love the TSA. It’s a free crotch grab and I don’t even have to drug anyone!

  33. Bob

    “I don’t want that X-Ray to see everything, honey.”
    It’s not Superman’s version of an x-ray – it’s an actual x-ray – it doesn’t “see everything.”
    I hate these idiots who don’t know how the freakin’ thing works!

    • McFeely Smackup

      This is what happens when you get uninformed idiots being quoted in the media, and other uninformed idiots getting their information from them.

      The full body scanners don’t produce nude photos, they just don’t.

      And as to the pat downs, I got MUCH more intrusively searched going into a heavy metal concert last week than anything TSA has ever done, thousands of people standing in line to get searched and not a single complaint. Funny how the indignation people feel is saved for the TSA when they’re not planning on flying anywhere, but when it’s a concert they want to see…fuckit, let’s go!

  34. sawan

    Face it, you american always need to fear someone: natives, then communists, vietnamese, aliens, russians, now arabs….and you always have to defend yourself from them, this allows you to act as terrorists, as now at the airports. They fabricate also fake attempts for you to accept this situation. For God sake I don’t have to travel in your country anymore so I don’t have to experience again your nasty security checks. For sure they are, ms. Kardashian is not overdrawing. Arab countries are much more polite and gentle, they trust you as a person, and refrain to poke your intimacy looking for bombs.

  35. hannaisha

    big heafty sashsquash is scared that a human might rape her..

  36. Dorian Gray

    Given what happened to Dr. David Banner, I’d have thought they’d be afraid to subject The Behemoth to X-rays for fear of dire biological consequences.

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