Kevin Smith’s gut is a terrorist

February 15th, 2010 // 70 Comments

Clerks director Kevin Smith was kicked off a Southwest Airlines flight Saturday night after a flight attendant essentially deemed him too fat to fly. The airline has a policy about not allowing passengers on who can’t put both armrests down which they used as a benchmark for their decision. The incident turned into a PR nightmare shortly afterward when they allowed Kevin to catch another flight which proved he wasn’t a flight risk and they basically embarrassed him in front of plane full of passengers for no reason.

If you’ve gone within ten feet of the Internet in the past 24 hours, you’ve probably been bombarded in the face with Kevin Smith’s non-stop documenting of the incident where he’s been kicking Southwest in the plane testicles. Obviously the airline picked the wrong fatty to kick off for sport – Whatever gets you through the day, that’s my philosophy. – but in hindsight, you’d think they’d want more fat people on board in case the plane went down. A.) Blubber is filling, no questions there and B.) if Lost has taught us anything, it’s that the heavy-set are hilarious and have magic powers. Back me up, rotund gentleman I paid to sit next to me and cover himself in butter. Hey, look, he’s wheezing. Will that summon the dragon?

Photos: Getty
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  1. Jeff

    Why do you complain about SW? It is a great airline. Ever sit next to one of these fat blobs with their sweaty fat arm pushed into your side because they can’t fit into a normal seat? It is not fair to the rest of us. I have seen many fat people jam their hips between the armrests only to spill over.

  2. Jeff

    Why do you complain about SW? It is a great airline. Ever sit next to one of these fat blobs with their sweaty fat arm pushed into your side because they can’t fit into a normal seat? It is not fair to the rest of us. I have seen many fat people jam their hips between the armrests only to spill over.

  3. ano nomous

    the pilot is just trying to help him.
    instead of flying the 60 miles he should walk it.

    when people view u as a possible act of global terrorism u need to reconsider ur fuckin diet.

  4. Lance

    These fat fucks are what is breaking our health system (diabetes related problems). They need to shut the fuck up and lose the weight period. If it’s thyroid (biggest excuse they use), they make pills for that.

  5. Drew

    Fuck SouthWest.
    Terrible service, crazy passengers and stupid regulations apparently.
    He was too fat for one flight but not too fat for another? WTF? Did the arm rests adjust on the other flight or something?

    “Oh you’re too fat for one seat.”
    Apparently that’s only true if the stewardess is a rude cunt.

  6. He can harass EMTs after he has heart failure and they need a crane to lift him onto a flatbed truck.

  7. TJSizzle

    The key to being overweight is knowing your damn limit. My wallet is in better condition than most. I live life on the side of over indulgence, but I am smart enough to know my limits. At 6’0″ and 205lbs I am well aware that I am about 25-30 lbs over weight and that’s ok. I am still physically capable of skiing in Aspen and surfing in Cabo. The bottom line is, I would never allow myself to cross the 215 barrier. I mean at some point you weight not only affects you, but those around you. Keep your **** together man!

  8. Tuppy

    Through his movies, Smith the one note hack has been trying to impose his unimaginative, desperately unfunny (Dogma? Seriously? That’s the best he can do with a big budget?), burnout psyche on pop culture. So, as a result, his career is in the toilet and he has to ride coach like poor people. Boo freakin’ hoo. He needs to man up and stop crying like a pansy ass bitch.

  9. spencerj

    Attention whore. That policy has been well documented for years. He knew what he was doing.

  10. hi guy’s,
    He should pour all that energy into losing weight instead of complaining about the situation.

  11. stu

    fatty needs to loose weight

  12. Tire Swing

    He’s not too fat; he’s too short.

  13. Doc Schweinstrudel

    Now that’s embarrassing.
    p.s. the Clerks suck!

  14. Poo Poo

    They probably put him in first class on the second flight after realizing who he was.

    Have any of you ever sat next to a fat person on a flight pre-regulations? If you have you would understand why these policies are absolutely necessary.

  15. D

    he deserves it after that aborted fetus he called “Zack and Miri Make a Porno”

  16. MONDO

    It just seems a little convenient that this happened so close to the release of his new movie “Cop Out.” No publicity is bad publicity I guess.

  17. Will

    I’ve seen Kevin Smith’s films, and I love them. Understand. Though, between this and the trailer to Cop Out, I’m convinced we need to stage a intervention for Kevin Smith. I heard that recording of a phone call.
    “….you don’t know who your dealing with! I’m a GOD….on the internet, in nerd circles and the indie film world….YOU’LL BE SORRY!”

  18. Jim Jones

    Seems reasonable to me. I know I’d hate to sit next to a fat-ass like that. Maybe Kevin Smith should try losing some weight instead of doing the whole “fat and proud” schtick.

  19. anne

    Hey…leave Silent Bob alone

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