Kevin Federline to release new song

Superficial / December 29, 2005

kevin_federline_thumb2.jpgAre you spending this New Years alone? Couldn’t find a date? Well no worries, because now you can ring in the New Year with Kevin Federline. While, amazingly, he couldn’t find a label to release his rap single PopoZao, he’s now distributing it on his own. The song will be released on New Year’s Eve, according to a mass e-mail sent from his myspace.com page.

It says: “I love you all. The ones that Love and the ones that Hate. The ones that Fight and those who Bite.” The single will be available on his Web site, kevinfederline.com, which promises, “I am coming.”

From what I understand, it would be technically “illegal” for me to murder Federline before he releases this song. But I doubt any jury would convict me once they hear it. I haven’t heard it yet, but imagine it will be some combination of 1) drums, 2) Dr. Seuss lyrics, 3) pepper-sprayed monkeys, and 4) an old man peeing into a coffee can. Verdict = not guilty.

Dubious Debut [Page Six]