Kevin Federline is still fat as all hell

October 2nd, 2009 // 28 Comments

The still-rotund Kevin Federline was spotted outside Kabuki Sushi Bar in LA yesterday, and I have no idea why he’s wheeling around a tiny suitcase. Although, I’m willing to bet money it holds a cow leg for him to chew on during the ride home.

KEVIN: Vicky, hand me mah cow leg.
VICTORIA: Honey, you left it in the trunk. I’ll pull over in a minute.
KEVIN: *gulp*
VICTORIA: What did you just – wait, didn’t we have both kids today?
KEVIN: I dunno.

I honestly don’t know how things didn’t work with Britney. They’re soul mates.

superficial

  1. Kim

    Fat or not, he scored himself a very fuckable piece of ass.

    Well done.

  2. mel

    I can tell you why it didn’t work out. Someone ate the other’s stock of cheetos. Clearly.

  3. Viv

    And this is news? When are going to see real celebrities? Pics too expensive to post? Maybe I should get my celebity dirt elsewhere…

  4. lbc

    i’ve seen him look worse….he actually looks like he lost weight!

  5. lbc

    i’ve seen him look worse….he actually looks like he lost weight!

  6. chupacabra

    either she’s got a fat fuck fetish, or she’s the ultimate gold-gold digger. Or is it gold digger-digger?

  7. Darn. And he used to be sorta cute.

    -meream

  8. Jackson

    Typical fat American like Kim Kardaskank.

  9. Josh

    He needs to go on “what not to wear.” When fatties wear huge clothes, it makes them look even fatter. Lose the jumbo t-shirts and baggy shorts. Geez.

  10. Randal

    Kevin is very good at marketing himself before his reality appearance for losing weight. What’s funny about it all is that everyone is so shocked at how large he is when it’s all been for the money he’ll receive after the show.

    He was very fit and healthy before, he’ll be so again.

    Randal

  11. TS

    Heh, the ‘small’ suitcase is actually a bag for bowling balls and shoes.

  12. ana

    He deserves it, I hope he stays fat!

  13. The Rough report

    Don’t you need a license to be this fat? Ill bet he cut back on security though…

  14. aj

    He can always use his child support checks to pay for gastric bypass surgery.

  15. Randal(l)

    This was all a publicity stunt for him to get on dance your fat ass off. except it spun out of control when he discovered the fried butter spill that Britney left on their kids heads.

    Randal(l)

  16. Squishy

    Two words…Man Breasts

  17. Beauty

    I love him

  18. Max Planck

    I dunno, Randal, he just looks like a fat turd to me.

  19. Jesus Juice

    Smokers suck.

  20. EuroNeckPain

    How can anyone wear those ugly … what’s the name… shorts ? Midget pants ? Typical American-style-chic streetwear ?
    Legs appear to measure a quarter of the body length. He looks like those spaceship inhabitants in the movie Wall-E.

  21. Darth

    He doesn’t look like he’s in a hurry to lose weight.

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  24. Jans

    that’s actually not a suitcase.
    it’s a two-ball bowling bag.
    the funny thing is how he makes the bag look so tiny still LOL

  25. 85 pounds isn’t normal but neither is 385lbs which is what it looks like Kevin is weighing in at. My question is this. HOW did he get so fat so fast????

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