Kevin Federline is doing Broadway

March 12th, 2008 // 32 Comments

Kevin Federline might be coming to Broadway. He’s reportedly been offered a role in the Tony-nominated musical Legally Blonde based on the nothing-nominated movie. Us Magazine reports:

The former backup dancer and aspiring hip-hop artist — who is hitting the gym after packing on “daddy weight,” ex Shar Jackson says — will test his song-and-dance chops in a trio of roles — including the UPS guy who inspires the “bend and snap.”
“This is his chance to show the world what he can do,” says a pal.

This is an outrage! The UPS guy is a pivotal role in the Legally Blonde canon. It’s the part where Elle Woods’ spunky can-do attitude inspires the lowly nail salon worker to have confidence in herself. And they’re giving it to Kevin Federline! Ooh, so angry right now. Blood pressure rising. Superficial Writer SMASH! *crushes donut* Boston Creme was a bad choice. RHAR!

superficial

  1. Gerald_Tarrant

    K-Fat is going to eat Broadway? He certainly has been looking like he’s eating everything else. I heard on wealthysponges.com he reportedly told his children “Get In Ma Belly!”

  2. fergernauster

    Wrong choice for him. He needs to be doing CK ads. Now THAT’d sell a shit-load (pun intended) of underoos.

  3. sherry

    u know i bet he ends up doing well with role he really doesnt have to say much if i remember the movie right…

  4. fergernauster

    Fuck this shit. I’m still ruminating over whether Heath Ledger performed all his “Brokeback Mtn.” scenes with cotton balls inserted in each cheek…

  5. buttinsky

    You know, K-Fed wouldn’t be half-bad looking if he didn’t have that ridiculous hillbilly hairdo.

  6. banter barbie

    TITTIES!!!

    millionairedatingsite.com

  7. banter barbie

    TITTIES!!!

    millionairedatingsite.com

  8. banter barbie

    TITTIES!!!

    millionairedatingsite.com

  9. HEATHER HARLOT

    THE ONLY ROLE HE’LL BE PLAYING ON BROADWAY IS THE PEANUT VENDOR ON THE CORNER.

  10. bessie

    He is a hottie. Is he single now? I saw his profile on millionaire&celeb dating site “WealthyRomance.com” last week. Just curious.

  11. fergernauster

    He needs to have a rip in his crotch so we can google his man-stick.

  12. Shar

    Ooooooh baby I would smack dat like a pancake.

  13. D. Richards (Heft.)

    Wanted: Urban-Interpretive-dancer for Broadway show.

    K-Diddly-Dog: Oh shnap!

    I’ve already seen what Kevs can do — making babies, collecting child support.

  14. Lancy

    Mmmm, it is said he is dating online now. I saw him on millionaire&celeb dating site “SeekingRich.com”
    last week. Good luck to his search.

  15. Rhettro

    Don’t mean to bust balls but legally blonde the movie wasn’t nothing-nominated.

  16. i would go see him! I don’t care, i like the KFed!
    http://slackerchic.blogspot.com/

  17. Lucky #13 {semen taste tester}

    You forgot he is somewhat of an accomplished artist regarding his musical career and performed as a professional dancer earlier and met one of the industries top performers and converted her into his $$$slave.

  18. dude

    Will all you dating site spamming fucktards realize that you’re doing far more harm to your site’s reputation than good?

    But on point, I see K-Fed has abandoned the “hardcore street rapper” look. This calls his street cred into serious question.

  19. Dick Richards

    Yes, #17 — I forgot to mention that Kevin Federline is an ‘artist.’

    I also forgot that Federline used a multi-millionaire, mentally disabled woman’s wish for a family, to insinuate himself in to her life, and her fortune.

    What an ‘artist,’ a creater. Pure genius, that guy.

    Are you fucking serious? You’re a moron. I hope you’re body dies.

  20. Son-of D. Richards

    your body*

  21. Harry Ballzack

    @ 6-7-8 …….. TITTIES-N-BEER ….TITTIES-N-BEER !!! (Frank Zappa Tune)
    You’re like your web site and your cohorts – you do things half-assed
    Getr it right for christs sake if you’re going to advertise your tits ya half baked moron

  22. Kristen Dei from LA (Louisiana that is)

    #5…His hair is like that for his recurring role on One Tree Hill, some teeny bopper sitcom in which his role is a rock-star type. I don’t really know all the details, as I’ve found out that information via another media circuit. That’s right, I am a celebrity newshound whore. Anyway, I totally agree that Kevino is not too bad looking…

  23. Harry Ballzack

    Oh yeah …. I suspect The Federation will crumble when attacked by nannies who demand $10k a week. I mean, if he’s giving waitresses $2k tips and The Britney Show even gets $1500 a month batshit money, they should at LEAST be making 10k a week to keep the “kid-fuck” out of his sight.

  24. I don’t know if i would call playing a character that has one line “doing broadway”. ..

  25. Chicken80

    He looks like he cuts his own hair @ home w/ manicuring scissors. What a douchebag.

  26. Trover

    KFed wonders everyone night “What can Brown do for you”. that thought used to involve Shar, but now he is thinking large. As in Broadway baby. What btter way to learn what brown can do than to go UPS on the big sttage?

  27. InternetToughGuy

    I don’t care what you guy’s say, I like K-Fed more and more each day. He is gonna come out of this whole situation smelling like roses.

  28. Haha

    Ha check out his coke nail!!!

  29. Randal

    Now this is a nice career move for KFed. Kevin can certainly dance, as was proven as a dancer for his ex-wife Britney Spears, so moving to Broadway will be nothing for the good man. As a dancer and musician, adding Broadway to his list of skills will vault him higher than he’s ever been before.

    Congrats KFed! Your fans support you!

  30. Kristen Dei from LA (Louisiana that is)

    #28…not to correct you because I guess it is possible it is a coke nail, BUT rappers keep longer nails also to help cut through cigars to roll blunts. Given Kevin’s supposed history in dabbling in the chronic, I would assume the latter.

  31. Ugh, another boost for Federline. It’s crazy how this guy has risen in the limelight and yet so many people hate him. It’s like a Paris phenomenon — stars for no damn reason!

  32. Brit's crotch

    On the plus side, the UPS guy does get his nose smashed by the salon-lady’s head. Now there’s an image I can get with, y’all.

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