Kevin Hart’s Sex Tape Mistress is Doing Photoshoots Now

Also…

C’mon Beyoncé, you can afford to pay Messy Mya’s family at least something for using her voice in your song that you made Katrina-sized money off of… [TMZ]

Aaron Carter continues to have a rocky 2017. [Celebuzz]

Let’s be real, the biggest story this week is this jogger who keeps taking dumps on peoples’ front lawns. They still can’t catch her! [DunkenStepfather]

Check out this utterly terrifying sculpture of Farrah Abraham’s breasts… that her daughter made. [TMTN]

The Today Show punk’d Fergie into thinking her album was no. 1 on iTunes. (It really wasn’t.) [BreatheHeavy]

Kanye West is officially a hogbody now. [PageSix]

Aaron Hernandez’ wife is suing whoever she can to make some quick cash off of her P.O.S. husband’s demise. [WWTDD]

Watch a woman(?) crush this watermelon with her vagina. You’re curious. [The Frisky]

Man claims to be immune to crocodiles, then finds out he is not immune to crocodiles. [WarpedSpeed]

I’m going to see mother! this weekend to put all this bullshit “high-art horror” talk to rest… [Celebitchy]