Kerri Walsh wants AIDS to ‘butt’ out (Don Draper, I just made you look like clown shoes.)

Olympic athlete and women’s volleyball competitor Kerri Walsh has wisely decided her ass is a veritable weapon in the fight against HIV/AIDS infection. I want everyone to know I’m “behind” this cause. Hi-OH! But, no, seriously, if I make a donation do I at least get to touch the butt and/or bounce a quarter off it? What if I just sort of run past it and graze it with my hand? I’m willing to post date as many checks as it takes to get this thing done. You know, because I care deeply about whatever it is your cause was again. Sea lions?