Kendra in Short Shorts Almost Had Nothing To Do With Charlie Sheen

I’m going to lay my cards on the table here: It was either photos of Kendra Wilkinson leaving her Dancing With the Stars workout in tiny shorts, or a Charlie Sheen post about Warner Bros. officially firing him from Two and a Half Men despite his secret efforts to try and return to a Chuck Lorre-free workplace. While both technically involve women who trade sex for room and board, I like to believe I made the best choice for the greater good.

UPDATE: And of course this quote just happened as I was typing this post:

“This is very good news. They continue to be in breach, like so many whales. It is a big day of gladness at the Sober Valley Lodge because now I can take all of the bazillions, never have to look at whatshiscock again and I never have to put on those silly shirts for as long as this warlock exists in the terrestrial dimension.”

I will personally buy Charlie Sheen a bucket of 8-balls if he’ll shut up for the rest of the day. Not a goddamn word until morning, that’s all I’m asking. Just have your Tweetmaster tweet me and you can start having warlock accord with space monkeys in a terrestrial shark fart. I can’t make it sound anymore awesome than that.

Photos: Fame, Pacific Coast News