Kelly Ripa is hot (I don’t say that enough)

July 10th, 2008 // 85 Comments

Kelly Ripa took place in the High Heel-a-Thon in Central Park to benefit the March of Dimes yesterday. Apparently, it’s a bunch of women running in heels and ultimately breaking their nose for charity. Sounds cool, but why not just punch each other in the face then write a check? Yeah, that stuff. Alright, Kelly, start swinging and don’t be afraid to pull some hair. You know, for the children. The precious, precious children – who love catfights. No, really, they told me. I wouldn’t make something like that up just to see you snap some chick’s sports bra. (Psst. The redhead.)


  1. CJ

    I’m sure the majority of these women probably bathe regularly and don’t live with ‘white discharge’….leave the ho house once in a while.

  2. A

    She’s a pretty women but she’s too skinny and has no chest or ass

  3. karen

    she is the cutest!

  4. Zanna

    @50….you know you’re still going to eat it.

  5. pinky_nip

    I’d rather listen to a choir of tone deaf ‘tards high on ecstasy and chewing gum, than listen to Kelly Ripa tell one more story about how “real” she is.

  6. She looks “HEALTHY” indeed!!

  7. #54 – Well that’s true… I never let a little yeast get in the way of my fish.

  8. dude_on

    Cute but far from hot. She could easily afford an upgraded rack – yet she chooses to provide us the dated look of a flat-chested mature woman. Science has caught up – women don’t have to be cursed for eternity with non-consequential boobies. And they really aren’t that expensive considering the reward.

    The chick without makeup, licking her lips in pic 5 is far superior in terms of a superficial evaluation. She could easily do high-end porn.

  9. britney's weave

    @58, ah, yes, the non-consequential boobies. now if we could only do something about those non-consequential dicks…

  10. VG

    Did anyone not notice the chick with a prosthetic leg in the background!? SO BADASS! One heel and one fake leg. You go, bionic girl!


  12. Heather Mills never got picked for the three-legged race… well not after the first dragging incident…

  13. justifiable

    Check out her cookware commercial and see if you can stomach that loud nasal high-pitched whine – I personally can’t stand that nails-down-a-chalk-board grating for more than three nanoseconds without reaching for a chainsaw. Hittable, yeah, maybe, but only if you’re willing to sacrifice all your glassware that will shatter the first time she opens her mouth and speaks.

  14. Doomhammer

    Here is a hint to all you girls whining about how she “whines with her nasal pitch”. YOU ALL SOUND THAT WAY TO US !!

    When you tell us about your stupid meaningless job, friends, family, what you bought at the mall, etc, it sounds EXACTLY the way you describe Kelly Ripa.

    This is why we do our best to keep our cocks in your mouth as much as possible, so we dont have to hear that shit !!!

  15. #64 – You, sir, are very insightful.

  16. Mi Liki

    I fell in love with her the first time I saw her on general Hospital. I never watch soap operas, I was just channel surfing and caught a glimpse of her. She is as close to perfection as you can get. Plus, I hear she squirts!!!!

  17. MOMO

    you do know thats really peeing eh?

  18. JimmyBachaFungool

    I would absolutely worship her from head to toe. Her look, personality and style make my pee pee go “da doyng doyng doyng.”

  19. Shelley

    She’s hot and she’s a funny girl. Her body is awesome too!

  20. Shelley

    She’s hot and she’s a funny girl. Her body is awesome too!

  21. moneil

    This is hilarious! I think Kelly Ripa is adorable. If you love celebrity gossip, play the newest celebrity trivia at!

  22. Trover

    I’d hit it from behind, so long as I could gag her. Otherwise, pass. I mean, fitting in with a Regis or Kathie Lee means you are so annoying even your own family avoids your voice.

  23. roop

    Me loves Pipa! She’s one tight little package of fun.

  24. Stinkfeet

    I just want her shoes!

  25. Silvia

    This is kind of silly, why are they in high hills? It’s hot and all but come on. . . fashion and althetics don’t go together.

  26. Silvia

    This is kind of silly, why are they in high hills? It’s hot and all but come on. . . fashion and althetics don’t go together.

  27. Insatiable Peter

    Would like to propound an alternative fundraising idea. It deals with me attempting to bust as many nuts as possible all over our favorite little morning talk-show host in a day, with intermittent breaks for rehydration and Oreos. Tentatively titled The Candy Apple Marathon.

    #64 – preaching to the choir

  28. Yep, I tagged that ass.

    With a first baseman’s mitt, but still. It was many years ago when Kelly was still in soaps, and came up to my town to do a benefit softball game.

    Rule 1 of benefit softball games: Let the hot chicks get on base.

    Rule 2 of benefit softball games: Once the hot chick is on base, the first baseman (in this case, me) and pitcher are obligated to try at least one pickoff move in hopes that she’ll get good and dirty diving back into first.

    In this case, something better happened and she got caught in a rundown. And so I tagged her. And held the mitt there perhaps longer than a gentleman should have, but in the heat of competition I wanted to be sure the ump got the call right.

    It was my finest moment in sports.

  29. packinwood

    Anybody ever wonder what happened to Long Duck Dong from the movie Sixteen Candles? Check out the background of pic number 7. LOL!

  30. kit kitten

    i despise this boring, tanorexic, man-armed bitch. she either need duct tape over her mouth or she should just be a greeter at wal-mart so she can yap about her stupid life all day long to bored house wiveswho think she is adorable.

  31. Larry Jones

    Check out the chick next to her with the big legs. When she’s with her yenta friends she probably looks pretty hot. When standing next to Kelly Ripa with that insane body and tight legs she looks like a fucking horse with heels. Life sucks.

  32. L


  33. Allan Greenspan

    Hey, she’s cute and crazy. What’s not to love?

  34. Suck on this!

    She has to look good to keep her husband tame, did you look at him?

  35. i think thats great thx for info

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