Kelly Ripa is hot (I don’t say that enough)

July 10th, 2008 // 85 Comments

Kelly Ripa took place in the High Heel-a-Thon in Central Park to benefit the March of Dimes yesterday. Apparently, it’s a bunch of women running in heels and ultimately breaking their nose for charity. Sounds cool, but why not just punch each other in the face then write a check? Yeah, that stuff. Alright, Kelly, start swinging and don’t be afraid to pull some hair. You know, for the children. The precious, precious children – who love catfights. No, really, they told me. I wouldn’t make something like that up just to see you snap some chick’s sports bra. (Psst. The redhead.)


  1. Kelly is definitely hittable!

  2. Doh

    Not First hahahahahha ( I mean you )

  3. buckeyedg

    whoa mama!

    This chick is so fine… cant stand watching her show… but she can definitely get me up every morning

  4. Regis

    Gelman and I hit that hard.

  5. She has a very cute little body…I can’t say that I “like” Kelly Ripa, but her body is adorable. And those arms are much better than Madonna’s.

    I also love the shoes.

  6. FCS

    So now a litle troll with no breasts, no ass , a face stretched way to tight and madonna like death hands is hot? Only on the superficial….

  7. crabby old guy

    Now THAT would qualify as being “good eatin’”.

  8. How many broken ankles do you think there were at the end??

  9. Drunkman

    She’s hot yeah but she’s generic-looking.

  10. havoc

    She is hot.

    If she ever shut the fuck up.


  11. Paul

    Kelly Ripa is one of the most annoying people on planet Earth. I would sooner put my head up Oprah and Queen Latifah’s ass than simply shake hands or be in the same room as Ripa. Even her last name is annoying. I would kill myself if I was married to her and had to hear her damn, damn voice all the time. She actually has no talent and make dickloads of money.

  12. Regis

    Look at her stretching like she’ll ever get above a brisk walk.

  13. Danni

    What’s the deal with the SOCKS? That chick behind her has freakin SOCKS on. Just wear your heels and risk a blister. It’s for charity. Now you’re documented around the world in these pix looking like a huge douche.

  14. beefytee

    I’d do it. I think she’s probably as annoying in real life as on TV…I would think logically I could put my penis in her mouth to shut her up…but she’d probably keep smacking her jaws thereby mangling my member. No thank you Kelly Ripa….no thank you indeed.

  15. Grievousfish

    This gets my vote for “Dumbest Ever Fundraising Idea”. Biomechanically speaking, humans are just not designed for this.

  16. Mal Gusto

    I had such a thing for her when she was Hayley on ” All My Children.” So she has been hot for quite a while.

  17. She is hot, but I daren’t say it out loud, for fear that Future Mrs Imaginary Reviewer will laugh at me. Ditto Leeza Gibbons. Sniff.

  18. I think she has the same trainer as Madonna. She’s got weird muscluar wiry freak look about her. It’s unnatural. Oh, and she’s too happy. I hate happy people..

  19. gb

    Leg tattoos=White trash

  20. Jrz

    Oh fuck them. They totally stole the idea from the Drag Races held every year in Dupont Circle in DC. And let me tell you, it’s WAY more entertaining to see a bunch of drag queens in full regalia racing around in high heels than these dingbats.

  21. britney's weave

    wait, why is she not being bashed for having no breasts? i thought everyone got bashed here for being flat. hmmm…

    personally, i like her and think she keeps herself in great shape. bring on the hate.

  22. Bigheadmike


  23. deva

    Whew, at least that crack ho, chimp Mya wasn’t in it. I’m sure she was still on that beach. I can hear it now, “Why did all the fish die and that great white told me to douche when I went in?”

    Ahhhhh. Summers Eve.

  24. deva

    Yeah #20, it’s much more entertaining to see a bunch of fegs dressed up as women rather than seeing real, hot women.


  25. Yeah… she’s hot all right…. reeeeaaaal easy to be “hot” when you have some Jamaican chick raising your kids and can pay for the 40 hour a week trainer, dietician, tummy tucks and overpriced laxatives. I’d like to set her ablaze… then she’d be real hot…

  26. veggi

    Socks and heels? Wow! Wheres the boombox blasting White Snake??

  27. Ted from Love Boat

    I want to Ripa her ass. Bet it is tight.

  28. deva

    Haha 27. Whitesnake. Awesome. So true though. WHere the hell is Tawny Kitain when you need her. Oh yeah, she’s still straight to the lifetime network.

  29. Anduvi

    See??? Older chicks can look reasonably presentable, as long as they’re mostly covered up. Kelly Ripa-Perineum (she’s given birth 3 times) is no exception. Remember when her typical-mom bombed-out-then-tightened tummy was shown in candid pictures, complete with a major outtie-button and an overall bumpiness that looked like a relief map of bin Laden’s Tora Bora hideout? At the time she had a hugely photoshopped magazine cover wearing a bikini and sporting a smooth tummy with an innie. Simple solution: stop lying and cover up. You look as good as an old thing can. Sorry, but you have to be satisfied with that rating.

  30. Jrz

    Hey, Deva, why don’t you got get bent you fucking pinhead? Whassamatter…not getting enough attention today or did you just realize that you’re you and yes your life is always going to suck?

  31. I think she is adorable and she and her husband seem like normal, hot and happy people. She’s always with her kids, playing in NYC. Her interviews are always funny and she basically won me over.

    god, for someone who hates celebs so much, I have an illogical crush on Kelly Ripa.

  32. BigJim

    Who is deva and why do I hate it?

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  34. Luckily we don’t get the USA fake bitches on TV over here, we have enough of our own, hideous shoes though!

  35. Fap Fnnnaarrr

    Who the fuck, what the fuck?
    I broke my nose in Holland last week.
    I wasn’t wearing high heels.

  36. Jrz

    Where would “here” be, #35?

  37. steve

    Ah yes…the annual “Running of the Cunts.”

  38. Ted from LA

    Does she remind anyone else of Elizabeth from The View? Not in a political way, but in a “I can’t ever shut the fuck up” kind of way. I’d take the black woman in the photo any day over Kelly the Mouth.

  39. Jesse Jackson

    Now, now, Ted. Your implication is that KR is so bad “even” a black woman would be better. Don’t make me cut your nuts off.

  40. jack

    38- otherwise known as ‘the better part of you that ran down your moms leg’

  41. Doomhammer

    She looks better today at her age, even with all the surgery, etc than most of you pimple faced bitches did at 18. I laugh at your pathetic attempts to cut down every woman on the fish. The more you cut them down, the higher the number on your poor, overworked bathroom scale.

  42. Doomhammer

    I will now return to firing bullets randomly out my window, hoping I’ll somehow hit a target I can’t see.

  43. Ted from LA

    That’s not the case at all. I just think she is really hot. Beautiful face.

  44. Jesse Jackson

    Yes, of course…a beautiful face. But otherwise she looks like Mike Singletary looking into the backfield before deciding to blitz. We don’t need your crumbs, man. (Keep hope alive!!! Yes we c—…fuck, now I’m sayin that shit, motherfucking skinny assed big eared motherfucker…)

  45. CJ

    Did someone do some photo editing? Check out the body on #621….do those legs look like they belong on that bodY? What’s going on?

  46. nipolian

    Man…….did Macy’s have a major run on black spandex or what?


    Hey, 45–you wanna cut off Obama’s nuts?

  48. Sandy

    Imagine all the white-discharge streaks that will be on the inside of all that black spandex by the end of the run.

  49. #49 – Thanks for that… suddenly my turkey and brie sandwich with extra mayo looks better in the trash…

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