Kelly Clarkson will not have sex with you

April 20th, 2009 // 55 Comments

- Kelly Clarkson uses the magic of music to say “You’ll be masturbating alone tonight.” Aww… [PopSugar]

- Slumdog Girl’s father was NOT going to sell her. It’s called “bartering.” There’s a difference. [Vulture]

- Lady GaGa enjoys a spot of tea with her pancakes. [Jezebel]

- Jonathan Taylor Thomas refused to show up for The TV Land Awards with the Home Improvement cast. It’s because Al molested him. True story. [Best Week Ever]

- Britney Spears will perform in London’s Picadilly Circus this November. Way to finish what George Washington started. No quarter for the redcoats! [Allie is Wired]

- Perez Hilton vs. Gay-bashing Miss California Contestant: A case study in how to inexplicably make the situation even more retarded. Seriously, this took effort. [Videogum]

Photos: Getty
superficial

  1. salawhite

    Recently I found a hot club — S e e k i n g t a l l . c o m — just for sexy tall gals and guys to find their cupid. Come on, tall singles. Don’t miss your love.

  2. dude

    ugh hours later here i am again, couldnt get that second pic out of my head, those plumpin thighs omfl!!! it’s like a bad accident.. love how in order to seem them up close i had to click a button that says “FULL SIZE+” BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

  3. “Kelly Clarkson will not have sex with you.”
    Yes, thank you Jesus!

  4. devilsrain

    Ms Cali gave an honest answer. Its the fact that all you queens out there want to be her so badly that you freak out over it. Thats the only reason for being mad at her for her opinion. Whats funny is you fucking fags probably grew up in homes where gay marriage was denounced too so fucking deal with it.

  5. Thanks for posting the mis cali vs perez thing, i dont watch either so i wouldn’t have known otherwise… how did perez get on the judges panel anyway??

    Basically they asked her a leading question hoping to get some free publicity on a topic they just assumed she’d agree with. They were so pissed to find out she had an opinion at all, and that it didn’t match their agenda was infuriating i’m sure. But to say it was the worst beauty contest answer ever totally doesn’t give enough props to that chick that was in you tube videos last year choking on a question and babbling incoherently like she were sarah palin or something lol

    Also i don’t think its such an unforgivable act of social ignorance to answer the way she did, it was not in her best interest as a pageant candidate considering how many queens are in the making of… but the arguement that marriage is between this or that and not that other thing or some other stuff, cats with dogs but never turtles and goldfish or whatever the arguement is… What it comes down to is that we have separation of church and state in this country for very good reasons and one is that when god is the debate then the state should abdicate responsibility over the matter. IE Governments can form a legal union and people can call it whatever they want to. I think its a fair concession to give the word ‘Marriage’ to churches and social groups to distribute as they see fit. Legally its discriminatory to grant civil unions to hetero couples and not homosexual couples. What would be so wrong about letting platonic friends form civil unions as well. It seems most christians have issue with the use of the word marriage, which they will have no say over once the government stops using that word across the board, then any organization can marry whoever the fuck wants that and we all live merrily and peacefully by no longer telling eachother what to do.

    Anyway yes both are idiots, but good for Miss Cali having an opinion and not abandoning it to please Perez, i’ve always hated leading questions like that, its not a question at all, its a prompt for spouting rhetoric. Maybe Perez will choose his soap box techniques more wisely in the future. I’m on his side on the issue, but man did he look like a douche.

    Hey Perez! Somebody disagreeing with you is not the same thing as someone getting the answer wrong! Just cause someone disagrees with you doesn’t mean they are a ‘basher’ , epecially when they are disagreeing politely and next time you want something said on tv you should get a mic and say it, dont try to coerce people into preaching what you think without even checking to see if they agree first dumb ass.

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