Kelly Clarkson’s Pregnant, Wasn’t F*cking Around

Not even three weeks ago, Kelly Clarkson announced that she was going to ride the shit out of her husband who she’d only been married to for 10 days until he put a baby in her for Christmas. Which worked, so just assume he’s dead now. He died. PEOPLE reports:

The singer, 31, and her husband Brandon Blackstock are expecting their first child together, Clarkson announced Tuesday on Twitter.
I’m pregnant!!! Brandon and I are so excited! Best early Christmas present ever,” she Tweeted.

When asked how she’d get the baby out in time for Christmas, Kelly Clarkson replied, “Simple. I’ll threaten to fuck it, too.” The child would arrive December 24 at 1:35 p.m. followed by a sibling three days later.

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