Kelly Brook’s ‘Perfect Pair’ is The Crap I Missed

Evening, folks. Photo Boy’s off today – and probably into next week – dealing with one asshole of a family crisis, so if you want to shoot him a tweet saying you enjoy his pictoral wizardry and/or the few times I actually let him write his own dick jokes, that’d be swell. On that note, instead of your normally scheduled The Crap We Missed, you get this ridiculous video of Kelly Brook’s breasts (above) that’s apparently something to do with charity? I honestly didn’t make it past the second jiggle. And if you think this means there won’t be a Most Important People tomorrow, shut your filthy trap. I’ve got a goddamn mammoth collection ready that’s basically the word equivalent of Jon Hamm poking holes in your cervix with his huge Jon Hamm wang I have no idea where that sentence just came from.

Uh.. Look, tits!

- The Superficial