Keira Knightley attended the premiere of her new movie Atonement last night in L.A. What manner of dark wizardry is keeping the top of her dress on? It’s like it’s super-glued to her breasts, if that’s what we’re calling them. I don’t know if they meet the requirements to be classified as such. According to the dictionary I wrote: “The female breast must not protrude into the chest but rather out. It must also present itself post haste for the predetermined price of one American dollar.” Sadly, the people at Webster didn’t see fit to adopt my definition. Philistines!
Photos: Bauer-Griffin
Jimbo | December 7, 2007 at 1:05 pm
FIST
Jack | December 7, 2007 at 1:05 pm
Eat, Papa, eat
holla@meh | December 7, 2007 at 1:05 pm
FIRST?? lol
TS | December 7, 2007 at 1:07 pm
Jesuschristalmighty, that’s actually Jimbo (it’s misspelled). Never thought I’d see the day.
boppa | December 7, 2007 at 1:08 pm
there is a see through tanktop-ish thing underneath.
sam | December 7, 2007 at 1:09 pm
you can totally see the strings around her neck and arms.
holla@meh | December 7, 2007 at 1:11 pm
there’s no magic here LOL the top is made clearly made of nylon. the dress itself is not cute at all. poor fashion choice on her part. “flashy or trashy?” i’d have to go with “trashy”
whoneedsenemies | December 7, 2007 at 1:11 pm
She might just beat Bjork in the “Ugliest Dress in the Universe” Contest….
Iota | December 7, 2007 at 1:11 pm
What’s the big deal? Everybody knows you can dress mannequins any way you want.
lux | December 7, 2007 at 1:11 pm
She looks beautiful. That is why thin and flat will always be in fashion. You can wear that kind of dress without looking like a total whore.
veggi | December 7, 2007 at 1:12 pm
TS- it’s a Jimbo troll..
her skeleton is really pretty. Bet she looked better alive..
q | December 7, 2007 at 1:13 pm
Beautiful girl, but she does not dress to flatter her figure
mike | December 7, 2007 at 1:14 pm
It’s nice to sit by a crackling fire in the winter. Or to throw Keira down on the rug and listen to her crackling while you bone her.
Sugar Tits | December 7, 2007 at 1:15 pm
My Peaches N Cream Barbie had the same dress! Only… she filled it better.
She Probably Claims She's A Size 12 | December 7, 2007 at 1:15 pm
A true size 2.
mkell | December 7, 2007 at 1:16 pm
Meh. It’s just a very light sheer fabric. You can see the edges and seams along her neckline and running up her ribs.
lunis | December 7, 2007 at 1:17 pm
If you melted her down, she’d be about the volume of one of Jennifer Love Hewitt’s asscheek/saddlethigh spread combos. Maybe that’s what the size 2 reference was.
hendero | December 7, 2007 at 1:18 pm
If I had no tits I’m not sure that’s the dress I’d choose to wear.
Wait, I’m a guy so I don’t have tits. I can’t tell if I’m happy or sad
josmo | December 7, 2007 at 1:18 pm
Superficial guy . . . You’re Friggen’ hilarious.
Hunter | December 7, 2007 at 1:19 pm
I would love to see all you bashers come face to face with some of these stars you comment on. Its The Superficial’s job…. But you all have no excuse, especially since you would be kissing ass if you even had the balls to interact with one if these people we love reading about on a daily basis…
mr right | December 7, 2007 at 1:19 pm
She’s perfect for one of those drunken, throw-her-around-the-room fucks.
Cunter | December 7, 2007 at 1:21 pm
#20 – kissing ass, like you did in your comment? You know, too much swallowing can be a bad thing.
Harry | December 7, 2007 at 1:21 pm
Umm… the straps holding up the dress is pretty obvious. This site is really reaching for something to write about. And, oh yeah: She’s a total babe.
Ed | December 7, 2007 at 1:22 pm
@21 – Agreed. Ahhh the wonders of alcohol…
want meds | December 7, 2007 at 1:22 pm
forget the hideous dress–wtf is up with her HAIR?
FRIST!!! | December 7, 2007 at 1:23 pm
#20 Oh yeah???? I saw Ed Begley Jr. at Universal studios, and I totally yelled, “Dude, your shorts are way to big for your head!!!”
So there..
Funshine | December 7, 2007 at 1:24 pm
It’s sad that she doesn’t even have enough energy to smile in any of her pictures… But maybe that’s a good thing because we’d see her stupid ugly underbite.
Vince Lombardi | December 7, 2007 at 1:24 pm
As an aspiring dermatologist, I would like to examine your moles, my dear!
veggi | December 7, 2007 at 1:25 pm
AND I saw Michael Jackson at Disney Land and, uh, I totally didn’t say anything, cause he scares the shit outta me!!
So there..
PunkA | December 7, 2007 at 1:25 pm
Whoever did her hair needs to be shot. It is absoltely horrible and has NEVER been a good look. Her little frame needs her to have great hair, not ugly hair, to take attention from her lack of curves. This makes her look like a little boy. Just awful.
And I really like her. Just not in that.
Antonio Howusay | December 7, 2007 at 1:26 pm
“total” babe? Not without a body. Pretty face, completely featureless stick-body. At a minimum, she needs that spic’s photoshopped butt, plus maybe Jennifer Love Hewitt’s boobs (which should be taken away on principle after she turned into such a disgusting fat cow).
rienne | December 7, 2007 at 1:28 pm
There is a mesh top. You can clearly see the side stitching.
RichPort | December 7, 2007 at 1:29 pm
So generous of you to call those “breasts”…
iknowitall | December 7, 2007 at 1:30 pm
She’s not smiling because wearing this dress doubled her weight…time for pukey pukey.
BustyRaquel | December 7, 2007 at 1:30 pm
Oh!
I would KILL for boobs that small!
She’s lovely!
FRIST!!! | December 7, 2007 at 1:32 pm
TS where you been?
veggi | December 7, 2007 at 1:32 pm
35- that’s exactly what you have to do to get ‘breasts’ like that…..
FRIST!!! | December 7, 2007 at 1:34 pm
I actually like the dress and would wear it if it were black..
And much shorter.
And more see through.
gaydarisON | December 7, 2007 at 1:35 pm
@20 I noticed you used “come face”, “kissing ass” and “balls” in the same post…it’s time to exit the closet and own up to your sexuality my friend.
Hunter | December 7, 2007 at 1:39 pm
whatever, haters! I’m beautiful and know it! You all are probably too stupid to read this. LOL!!! I just keep it real. You all would be kissing my ass!
Angela | December 7, 2007 at 1:40 pm
Eek. Girl needs to hit the gym..she has no definition at all.
RENEE... | December 7, 2007 at 1:43 pm
Oh yeah, its miss “I’m not anorexic”….riiiiight. And she thinks that she’s fatter than most hollywood actresses. Good god Keira! Wake up and smell the, ah, food! Eat something gosh dammit!!!!
puffs plus | December 7, 2007 at 1:43 pm
i like girls in all shapes and sizes.. well except fat girls
i like her face, but i hate her hair.
pah-leez | December 7, 2007 at 1:44 pm
@20/40
Yuh…uh-huh.
Jimbo | December 7, 2007 at 1:44 pm
@35 Why do you want boobs that small?
AuntieBee | December 7, 2007 at 1:45 pm
#35…
I agree, whole heartedly. I would do anything for boobies that small. Mine are such a burden…imagine a life without pokey, itchy bras. I envy Keira… *sigh*
veggi | December 7, 2007 at 1:47 pm
42- exactly. She’s so pretty, if you added pasta and bread..
Ted from LA | December 7, 2007 at 1:50 pm
Actually, I know for a fact that is the BACK of the dress. Her head is just turned 180 degrees. She can spin her head all the way around like that girl from The Exorcist. Not many people outside of Hollywood know this. In fact, she was the second choice to play that role in The Exorcist. Yeah, that’s the ticket.
Sean | December 7, 2007 at 1:52 pm
I’d give my left spleen to taste one of Keira’s cute little boobages.
Burgernoodle | December 7, 2007 at 2:01 pm
What the fuck is that? It looks like something I made in art class. When I was 5.