Keira Knightley replaces Kate Moss

April 27th, 2006 // 119 Comments

keira-chanel.jpgChanel announced yesterday that they’ve picked Keira Knightley to be the new face of their Coco Mademoiselle fragrance. Keira will start appearing in ads next year, and is taking over for Kate Moss whose contract expired last October and has been starring in their ads since 2002. Keira said in a statement:

“[I'm] really proud to have been asked to work with such an iconic house as Chanel, and thrilled to follow the extraordinary women who have been associated with it before.”

I’m hoping Keira follows in Kate Moss’ footsteps and turns to a life of cocaine addiciton. I’ve always been curious as to what cocaine can do to a girl who looks like she already uses cocaine. Maybe she’ll get so skinny her breasts will actually invert. Then she can use her chest like a little bowl and store stuff in there. Like fruit or something.

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  1. pinky_nip

    @49:

    It’s not for you, it’s for us. Stop being so selfish.

  2. boredmilf

    @49

    How is gang-banging a chick gay?

  3. TaftHartley

    An “Edna Bambrick” is a sexual term describing ramming your cock as far into someone’s throat as possible in order to sut up their incessant religious/nagging talk.

  4. TaftHartley

    I’d love to do an “Edna Bambrick” on most posters here.

  5. Keira Knightley??
    Gross. Shes like 110Lbs and dosen’t even have bullimia, how is she supposed to do print ads?

  6. BigJim

    #51:

    Can’t we just use a butt plug or something?

  7. mamacita

    On an unrelated note, I’m watching that FoodTV Show, “Everyday Italian” and Giada is making pesto. She just said “I can tell how thick it is just by touching it”. Tee hee hee.

  8. boredmilf

    @57

    Don’t leave us hanging here… how thick is it????

  9. pinky_nip

    #56:

    Ok. I’m easy. Anyway, the position of DP seems a tad uncomfortable. Too many legs.

    All those cooking shows are sexual. Just watch Rachel Ray for 10 minutes.

  10. sweetlips

    #45….what Channel is telling us is this….they hire skinny coke head girls “UNITL” they get caught on camera snorting 10 lines in 45 minutes, then they go hire another emaciated model and on and on and on……….

  11. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    57 – That Giada’s a slippery little slut. You can tell by how she stirs the sauce. What a dirty harlot.

  12. boredmilf

    I checked out that link… all the pics are cute/sexy… chocolate, strawberries, apple pie… but a big fucking turkey??? WTF?

  13. pinky_nip

    #63
    She just got done “stuffing the turkey”. *wink-wink*

  14. brewdick

    Rachel Ray is annoying bitch and her show $40 a lay sucks

  15. boredmilf

    Brewdick… don’t lie – you’d pay the $40 to stuff her turkey…

  16. brewdick

    i’d pay 40k to stuff that bitch in an oven…

  17. Tay

    She was hot in Pride and Prejudice, when she actually stood up straignt and didn’t have a pound and a half of eye liner under each eye. This picture isn’t so flattering, but would I do her? You bet.

  18. BigJim

    I’m sick of this thread. It’s totally anorexic.

    Let’s get a fresh story here, like: “Edna Bamrick has threeway with Lush Rimjob and Condi Rice in White House Lobby”

  19. Iambananas

    She looks weird in that picture… I miss Edna… she’d report the superficial fro saying “cocaine”

  20. Sodomy_is_for_Girls

    Yeah, but on the plus side, if you hit it from behind you would have a perfectly flat surface upon which to rest your ashtray right between her shoulderblades. Or maybe Kate Moss’s “cutting mirror”.
    I don’t know if I’d hit it, but I’d certainly knock on her back door…

  21. Edna Bambrick

    I am reporting all disgusting posts.

  22. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    ~Mamacita, I hope you know that Rachel Ray has been on my list of people to kill for a long time now, right below MeganHarris. But now that I’ve seen these pictures I just want to print them and hang them in my office so everyone can have a good laugh on Friday. Because Friday is Jeans Day! Hooray! I’m pretty sure I still want her to die, though.
    ~BigJim, how’s it going on averageIQ.com/forrestgump/forums lately? I heard BubbaShrimp69 got in a fight with JJJennyzBox_A_Choklitt. Say it ain’t so!

  23. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    Fake Edna Bambrick is so passe.

  24. mamacita

    @74

    Consider this:

    Yum-O
    EVOO
    Oh my gravy

  25. Edna Bambrick

    Thanks for signing in, Edna Bambrick. Now you can comment.

  26. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    76 – I hate, HATE that bitch. *Throwing up everywhere*.
    I might even hate her more than MeganHarris, but don’t tell her that.

  27. mamacita

    @78

    I always watch her show, but feel like I want to kill her the entire time. It’s a really weird compulsion. Kinda like the way I’ll sometimes watch Saved By the Bell reruns and the whole time, I just sit there ripping the show left and right. Gives me an outlet, I suppose. Speaking of Saved By the Bell, do you remember this episode?

    http://www.bustedtees.com/shirt/imsoexcited/male

  28. Did Kate still have problems of stopped drains? It is a good thing because Keira is really sexier than kate! hmmmm

    http://www.lezlife.com

  29. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    79 – Yes but 99% of the people who see that shirt won’t get it so it’s useless.
    Was that Kelly or Jessie?
    My husband tortures me by leaving it on her show when he’s changing the channel. I can’t stand her fucking face, the things she says, her quirky upbeat attitude about “mmm, this spanakopita is fabulous!!!” It’s like she has hearts and smiley faces drawn around everything she says. And she has no tits. Things with no tits should not be on TV. This is America, dammit.
    Rachel Ray is officially on notice.

  30. mamacita

    Girl, that was Jessie. Remember, she had that singing group thing going, PLUS the damn midterms. What else can a girl do, but get hooked on caffeine pills? I hate the FoodTV montage commercial thing when Rachael Ray’s little bit says something about “It’s all about FOOD” and “You see how much good food you can make?”. My chief complaint about her (and I have many) is that she always says EVOO, but then follows it by saying Extra Virgin Olive Oil. I’m always like “Jesus!!! Why’d you make up that stupid fucking abbreviation if you’re just gonna say the whole thing right afterwards EVERY TIME???????!!!!!!!!”

    P.S. Do you have any fucking idea what digypoke is talking about?

  31. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    82 – I can only presume it has to do with poop.
    Jessie Spano got me hooked on Zantrax 3. YES!
    I’m not talking about Rachel Ray anymore. I makes me too homicidal for the general public to deal with. I’ll wait until I get home.

  32. gogoboots

    Fisher 55, those magazines are so interchangeable…

  33. hotintempe

    She looks like Nichole Richie….I wont buy any Chanel products now.

  34. In your face

    hot hot hot

  35. prideofchucky

    Posted by oshkoshb-goshdammgosh :

    “I would like to line them all up and watch them scream while a big mechanical penis sprays mayonaise on their faces and high fashion clothing.”
    ——————————————
    So in other words, send them to a GWAR concert?

  36. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    87 – That way we can listen to beautiful music while we watch! Brilliant!

  37. fanie

    I thought this was Lindsay Lohan, for a sec.

  38. BadassFred

    Bratz don’t wear thongs, dumbass. I babysit kids that have them and the strip of fabric in the clothes is just there to keep to freaking skirts from riding up.

  39. dirtypiratehooker

    Cool, maybe Keira can start dating crackheads like good ‘ol Petey just like Kate Moss too. It must be something with Chanel…they brainwash their models into doing coke for lunch and dinner (no one eats breakfast these days unless they are big heifers) and then have lots of dirty sex with dirty men to work off the remaining calories from the cocaine. Just a guess, though.

  40. krisdylee

    BadassFred? Babysitting? Little girls? And you’ve checked out the Bratz underwear? Oh for the love of Edna’s cunt, why did you dig that hole for yourself?
    Stupid stupid little boy….

  41. LittleWatson

    #87: lol! Gwar! I went to high school with a girl who claimed she was in Gwar. She then died of a drug overdose. Complete liar.

  42. mamacita

    @90

    Let me get this straight. Did someone with the screen name “BadassFred” just call me a dumbass?

  43. Well I don’t give a shit if you hate me. I hate keira, well no, not really. i just don’t like her, i think she’s too british for me. I like Britpop, but not snotty lil brit girlie girls.

    She needs to disappear.

  44. starboard

    KN is a poor man’s Natalie Portman…

    Big sunglasses don’t buy you class anymore than money buys you taste.
    Did anyone see a little movie called “The Hole”?

    What is wrong with the fashion houses whoring themselves out to starlets? First Louis V with Lindsay Lohan and now this… They look more like dELiAs models to me.

  45. gammanormids

    I always wondered what does anorexia smell like… I suppose I have to buy Coco Mademoiselle fragrance to find out, then…

  46. Pez_D_Spencer

    Eesh. What’s the worst thing about Keira Knightly?

    Her hips break when you fuck her.

  47. Jacq

    #94 – Yeah, he’s sooo fuckin’ badass that he’s a NANNY.
    Tell me Mary Poppins, do these dolls walk around? How do their skirts ride up? You dry humping them? Is it hard to tickle their little clits? Thanks for the info. Douche.
    You are the LAST person that should be around kids.

  48. ieatthepoo

    My name is Dom-eeno Har-vay. I AM a boonty hun-tah. And tom cruise loves the cock. Snoogans!

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