Keanu Reeves runs over the paparazzi

March 20th, 2007 // 208 Comments
superficial

  1. didey23

    whoa!!

  2. HollyJ

    Second?

    He’s clearly been hanging out with Matt McC

  3. didey23

    the guy probably deserved it. I feel no pity for paparazzi. If he wasn;t behind the car in the first place he wouldn’t havegot hit.

  4. Jiimbo

    Check out those legs.

  5. HollyJ

    Is that a shot of cough syrup in his hand?

  6. didey23

    He looks much berrter clean shaven. The grizzly Adams look is not very appealing.

  7. BarbadoSlim

    That piece of shit pap better pay for any damage to that sweet Carrera 4. And if he’s dead, his family better pay for it.

    Porsche, Excellence was expected.

  8. danielle

    Looks to me like KeanEWW got hit by them.

  9. veggi

    Yay Ted! Or was he Bill?

  10. roselynnerae

    He’s more concerened with his Porsche than with the paparazzo he ran over.

  11. lambman

    I like that his Porsche is from the same year people stopped caring about anything he did.

  12. HollyJ

    Believe it or not, it’s still illegal to run over people with your car, even if you don’t like them.

  13. DrPhowstus

    Wow, he sure has let himself go since the Matrix 4 was turned down by the studio.

  14. almostfamous

    haha he just hit a guy and he’s checking his car. the only reason he hit the guy is because he knew no one would bother publishing the pictures if he didn’t

  15. BarbadoSlim

    We are gonna start caring about fucking scumbag paparazzi now?

    fuck’em

  16. veggi

    SAFE parking only is the sign behind his head.
    Dude, it said safe parking. Why was I to think any different? Come on Ted, lets travel through time. Excellent!

  17. jager2ways

    Things are afoot at the Circle K.

  18. #11 lambman

    Ok, that was fucking funny.

    As for the picture, I didn’t know that BJ and the Bear was still filming.

  19. schack

    bwaaahhhhhhhh haaaaaaaaaabaaaahhhhhhhh

  20. schack

    the virtue of the devil is in his loins, and the virtue of his loins is in his car…

  21. Good for him

    youtuberoast dot cahm

  22. D'oh Eyes

    What is that brown gash-looking thing in his shin? Or is it just dirt that he hasn’t bothered to scrub off?

  23. jrzmommy

    I think he looks hot. Not Earl hot, or even Wally hot, but still pretty hot.

  24. alaskanchicsickle

    Sorry, can’t feel bad for the pap, they bring it upon themselves; the idiot probably popped out from behind another car to get a pic, and Keanu didn’t see him.
    Keanu looks scruffy, but cute. I want to take him home and groom him.

  25. veggi

    I’d so take him to pleasure town. Just not let him talk….

  26. jrzmommy

    Ok, this is getting weird now…schack, last night I had a dream about your loins.

  27. imran karim

    okk

  28. julyper

    AAAH!!! His legs!!! Too white!!!

    I like him though.

  29. #22 The gash is from when I got super pissed at the dial-up here at the office and grabbed my machetti and went nuts at the 7-11 parking lot down the street. I swear I didn’t mean to hurt him, he just got too close when we were both practicing our Matrix moves…

  30. schack

    hah! you didn’t have to tell ME that, mommy

  31. scienceguy

    I think one day each year celebrities should be given permits to hunt down paparazzis. The first day of spring seems an ideal time.

  32. FRIST!!!

    Turns out he’s not as flexible as he looks in his movies.

  33. p911gt10c

    WOA WOA WOA, LET’S PRIORITIZE HERE PEOPLE!

    First things first: How badly damaged is the Porsche and how can the pap. pay for it??

  34. guymorgan

    Do you have these photos of the starbucks dumpster? Can you give me the torrent?!, omg thank you.

    I remember him being in a film version of Much ado about nothing, he was crap.

  35. lickmybutt

    these photos arent even from the incident. it says the incident happened at 8:45 p.m. and its still daylight out in those pix. plus it says he was parallel parked and in those pix he is not. LAME.

    once again… wouldnt the paps actually have pictures of the incident?

  36. HollyJ

    His dad, from Hawaii, picked up an English showgirl while he was in Beirut. The showgirl ended up being Keanu’s MOM. Hooker!! Keanu and his sis were both born in Beirut BTW.

    He and his sister are Lebanese/American citizens of Irish/Portuguese/Chinese/Hawiian ancestory.

    For god’s sake, doesn’t anyone stay put and breed locally?

  37. leo

    Something doesn’t add up here. Someone wanna try to explain how he can be inspecting his Porsche in broad daylight “…after the jump” that you claim occurred at 8:45″pm”….???

  38. veggi

    His band really rocks though…. NOT! hahahahahaha. I couldn’t help using the worthless 80′s retarded humor.

  39. Jiimbo

    There has got to be something better than this out there. Even the so called picture of Lindsay’s snacth is more entertaining than Keanu running over some stupid paparazzo.

    Please bring back the pictures of Britney going crazy with the umbrella or the picture of Fergies bathing suite going up her ass.

    Hey Veggi, can I dream about you tonight?

  40. veggi

    of course. I drempt I was at work all last night. Then got up and went to work…. anything would be better than that.

  41. Jiimbo

    Veggi,

    I have a better dream for you

  42. veggi

    Oh, J to the double i mbo, you dirty little thing. Are we having an affair?

  43. NotANiceGirl

    Do you think they’ll add how to run over the paps to the Keanue Reeve’s film class @ the Art Center College of Design in Pasadena?

  44. HughJorganthethird

    How the fuck can you be that pasty white when you live in fucking California ?I live in the fucking arctic, right now anyway, and I’ve got a better tan than that.

  45. Jiimbo

    I won’t tell if you won’t

  46. danielle

    Tan’s aren’t natural.

  47. veggi

    I’d TAN his hide, and yours J!

  48. Jiimbo

    How the hell do you figure that Danielle? If you go out into the sun light, you skin turns brown. That is nature at work

    Are you a all natural girl? Do you still have that 70′s bush?

  49. Jiimbo

    Don’t tease me Veggi!!! You are giving me very unnatural thoughts

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