Katy Perry & Russell Brand Are Probably Getting A Divorce

December 29th, 2011 // 61 Comments

UPDATE [12/30/2011]: TMZ reports Russell Brand has filed for divorce. More after the holiday.

Katy Perry and Russell Brand apparently spent Christmas apart this year after getting in a “massive fight” which seems unusual because you’d just assume a Christian and a sex addict heroin junkie would be the key to a successful marriage. Also, goose monstering. Us Magazine reports:

Which explains why, come Dec. 25, the multi-platinum singer was snapped splashing in the Pacific Ocean off Kauai — sans wedding ring. [Ed. Note: We'll have these pics next week unless I get robbed by one of my johns again. - SW] Meanwhile, British comic Brand, 36, was catching up with a pal in a pub in chilly Coverack, Cornwall.
Though the pair denied divorce rumors in November, sources say trouble is brewing. “They haven’t split up just yet, but things are not good,” says the first source. “The fighting is getting worse.”
At issue? Among other things, explains another source: “Katy doesn’t think Russell respects her parents’ Christian beliefs or her friends.”

Keep in mind, Katy Perry’s parents aren’t just Christians, but evangelical Christians (Read: The batshit crazy kind.) who literally believe that God compels them to speak in gibberish when he’s not warning them of the Satanic pull of Lucky Charms:

“Speaking in tongues is as normal to me as ‘Pass the salt.’ It’s a secret, direct prayer language to God.” Perry, 25, adds that her dad usually speaks in tongues while her mom plays interpreter. “That’s their gift,” she explains.
“I wasn’t able to say I was lucky because my mother would rather us say that we were blessed, and she also didn’t like that lucky sounded like Lucifer.”

On the other hand, Russell Brand starred in Hop and pretended to occupy Wall Street, so he’s really in no place to judge anybody. Frankly, he should kiss these people’s feet for not repeatedly buffeting him about the face and neck as is their legal right for those offenses, not to mention all the times he’s seen their daughter’s giant breasts naked. Yes, the meek shall inherit the Earth, but there should probably be a line at just giving away free boob treasure to any Limey who floats ashore on a raft made of heroin. That’s just me.

Photos: Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Carles

    Who’s worse?

    Jesus Freaks or Truly, Mindfuckingly Awful “Comedian”

    Can’t they both lose?

  2. Deacon Jones

    “adds that her dad usually speaks in tongues while her mom plays interpreter.”

    Dude. If you vote for someone who openly aligns themselves with these evangelical freaks, go jump off a bridge.

  3. ArtGirl

    I always just thought Katy Perry was the normal ‘Hollywood’ kind of stupid-and-detached-from-reality, but this brings it to a whole other level. “It’s a secret, direct prayer language to God”? Give me a fucking break…

    • Matt

      Plus, don’t you find it kind of interesting that this is coming from the same woman who sang a song with the line, “I kissed a girl, and I liked it”?

  4. I hate to take the side of a guy with a Miami Vice shadow beard, but maybe Russell got the idea that Katy didn’t take her parents’ beliefs seriously either when she sang “We’ve got white sand in our stilettos/ we freak in my Jeep” and married him in a Hindu ceremony.

  5. Hugh Gentry

    She is way too good for him. I can’t wait for them to split up for good.

  6. stratacat

    i… i can’t believe that quote is real… my brain just leaked out of my ear a little.

  7. Jim G.

    He is fugggly and she is a Brunette Goddess and does not realize how far out of he league he is.

  8. It's the kimkim, bitches

    Good. People shouldn’t get married anyway. Just stay together til you’re sick of each other. No paperwork, no lawyers. Easy.

  9. forrest gump

    let’s hope so…………
    JUST PRAY, folks!!

  10. QWERT

    You’ve got a bad definition of evangelical Christian.

    http://www.gotquestions.org/evangelical-Christian.html

  11. Frank Burns

    What about the baby!?! Won’t somebody think about the baby?!?

  12. I Complain A Lot

    You deal with evangelical Christians the same way you deal with pushy sales people, nod politely and don’t make eye contact. Then run when they’re not looking.

  13. Donald Trump

    Good! She should set those titties freeeeeee!!!!!!!!

  14. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    Donald Trump
    Commented on this photo:

    You know – with dark hair – she’s actually hot!

  15. Cock Dr

    He’s probably bored out of his mind with her by now. She’ll be back on the market by summer.

  16. Time Flys

    She’s ruined goods.

    • Ina Garten's Panty Shield

      +1 – who in their right mind would want to nail a woman who had been with a heroin user, or a sex addict, much less a combination of both?

  17. sunnyroberto

    I hope she has a good pre-nuptual agreement, otherwise that greasy British dirtbag has hit the lottery.

  18. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Anyone marrying into a batshit crazy christian family who isn’t themselves a batshit crazy christian is in for a big wakeup call.

  19. Buddha

    “lucky sounds like Lucifer”.

    Lucifer means ‘bringer of light’. Reading the Bible, Lucifer was pretty cool, he was God’s right hand man, God was having a meeting with the angels and Lucifer wandered in late, God said ‘Where have you been?”, Lucifer says “I’ve just been walking about on Earth a bit”. Awesome stuff. True story Bro.

  20. Steve O

    Homosexuals bashing Christians. They begged for Tolerance and now that they are out of the closet they have no tolerance for anyone else. Hypocrites can go sodomize each other!!

  21. Venom

    I don’t care I just want to see her awesome boobs and Russell Brand is just the type of sleazebag to make sure he not only took pictures of them and would release them, but also a good chance that he has one or several sex tapes of them.

  22. this marriage is falling apart, I could see this coming, there are just some celeb parings you can tell from the start are BAD. Now I am just waiting for the entire Demi-Wilmer thing to implode.

  23. common

    it is the crack.
    any opium is no big deal.

  24. cc

    So even morons get tired of the company of morons?

  25. tom

    No worry for Russel as I’m sure he will easily upgrade over that plain jane.

  26. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    J.R.
    Commented on this photo:

    “See? She’s got a little extra all over.”

  27. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    Ina Garten's Panty Shield
    Commented on this photo:

    The first of many skin conditions every woman who sleeps with Russel Brand experiences, and untreatable by the best of modern medicine. Up next: moles that puff out a putrid yellow powder when touched.

  28. CS

    She is a “Jesus freak”?

    Guess I missed the part in Sunday school where we all sat around singing about Last Friday night when I Kissed a Girl.

    Subtle…real fucking subtle. Religious my ass. Wake the fuck up people. Like everything else in Hollywood, it’s all bullshit….for the money.

  29. so

    i actually really like them as a couple, i think they really love each other and married for the right reasons :) i hope this is just a bump in the road for them or a media ploy because they are one of the few celebrity couples i actually care about, ive been coming to this site for years and sometimes the cynicism displayed in the comments is a bit too much for me

  30. DAB

    What a surprise…lol…only surprise is that it took that long…I think he is a disgusting freak

  31. Hollywood is such a joke. Who didn’t see this coming. I just feel sorry for Katy that she had sex with someone this disgusting.

  32. bYRD

    Why all the hate for Brand? Yeah, Katy is way too good for him and he looks dirty and smelly but I think he’s funny and he seems like a pretty straight up, authentic guy who doesn’t try to be poseur or someone he’s not. So, why all the hate?

  33. tlmck

    Raise your hand if you did not see this coming when they announced their engagement.

  34. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    Devilsrain
    Commented on this photo:

    “Take your stinkin paws off me you damn dirty ape “

  35. Trippin' Ballz

    What? The sex addicted, drug addict and the christian pop star that has had something fly out of her tits in every film clip she has ever made are not going to live happily ever after?
    Wow, I for one am truly shocked. Shocked I tellz you.

  36. dooood

    w/e, he made me laugh in that get him to the greek movie.
    and she’s given me several boners.
    best of luck to both of them

  37. Expletive:BMP

    Nothing irks me more than those who claim to speak in tongues and then proceed to talk in donkey shat. In scripture, whenever they spoke in tongues, they spoke a foreign language, not some made up donkey shat. Some one in the audience represented a foreigner in your midst; and if by chance some one spoke a foreign tongue with no foreigners, then that would should remain quiet until they meet some one in that area that spoke the foreign tongue. Nothing bothers me more than an ignorance of the scriptures.

  38. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    JetStar
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn I am 42 years old and that guy looks 10 years older then me.

  39. Emanuel

    I think Russell Brand and Katy Perry make a great cuolpe and I hope they get married and have kids together! That would be so cute

  40. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    anonymous.
    Commented on this photo:

    LOL if you look close,you can see her nipples,this is not the first time she has gone BRALESS.In the starrstruck video when she was getting rained on with the waterfall,you can see your nipples,her at the 2010 VMAS she’s wearing a tatoo almost see through dress,her perfume launch in mexico and much more.

  41. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    don’t pull the dress back up,leave it to slip that would make my day.

  42. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    ps3fanatic
    Commented on this photo:

    she REALLY hates bra’s

  43. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    Britta
    Commented on this photo:

    Jolie voix, Mais ne pousse pas trop ta voix sur les notes les plus aigus car la ce ne deinvet plus trop pre9cis. Mais sinon Jolie voix

  44. Katy Perry Russell Brand Arthur Premiere
    Daniel
    Commented on this photo:

    i absolutely loved u in the viroicta’s secret fashion show. i hope to grow up just like you and become a viroicta’s secret model and earn my wings. You are a role model to me and all my friends.

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