Katy Perry’s Going For Robert Pattinson Already

It’s barely been four days since Robert Pattinson moved out of the house he shared with Kristen Stewart, and already Katy Perry is moving in for the kill because she has giant breasts and can do whatever the hell she wants. Via Hollywood Life:

“Katy has been a rock for ­Rob,” a source close to Rob told the Daily Star.
“She has reassured him she is very much there for him just as he was for her when she split from Russell [Brand]. She has urged him to take a break with [Kristen].”
Rob reportedly offered words of encouragement to Katy when Russell filed for divorce from the “Wide Awake” singer. He really helped her get through the dark period in her life.

Of course, this contradicts reports that she’s hooking up with John Mayer, but I’m sure those people probably just saw him try to rape her. And if you think that’s offensive, keep in mind, I’m not the one accusing a woman of having consensual sex with John Mayer’s white supremacist penis, so who’s the real asshole in this picture?

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, INFdaily, Splash News