Katy Perry is Killing Russell Brand

November 8th, 2010 // 25 Comments

It’s been two weeks since Katy Perry and Russell Brand were married in India and it feels like they fell off the face of the earth because people almost immediately lost interest. Cut to Saturday night where Katy and Russell made their first public appearance at the MTV EMAs and you’ll notice something missing: Humongous breasts. Apparently Katy Perry is a saintly married woman now despite frequently bragging about doling out enough premarital coitus to con a sex addict into marrying her. And, as this game always ends, she’s rewarding him by wearing long johns all the time and refusing to make with the goods. Plus look at his face. That’s the face of a poor bastard who consistently gets asked for a baby the second he wakes up.

KATY: Russell… Russell, are you up?
RUSSELL: Huh? What is it, love? Is me heroin all gone?
KATY: I want a baby.
RUSSELL: Oh bloody ‘ell. Every morning!
KATY: It’ll make my boobs bigger.
RUSSELL: …. Right. Shall we then?

(That’s how they getcha.)

Photos: Splash News, WENN, WireImage


  1. Oh snap

    Well… that’s just too bad


    They need to bankroll their money………their fifteen minutes is pretty much up…..his especially.

  3. Nicole

    Hello.. This picture proves she stuffs and or has an enhancement bra!! She’s not that big superficial writer.

  4. fester

    I give it about 3 months before Russell gnaws through his own pecker to escape the trap. Good for him!

  5. Cock Dr

    Horrible hairstyle. Nightmare outfits. She’s covered up the twins!
    At least I wasn’t forced to listen to the “music”.

  6. Katy Perry Russell Brand MTV EMAs
    Commented on this photo:

    he’s not happy.

  7. She might wana test the longevity of that rel before getting knockd up..

  8. molly

    why do broads think fake eyelashes are deceiving in any way? christ..

  9. uhm

    She looks like a piece of shit. She always has a mask of makeup on, and still manages to look like shit. Hair, clothes, everything. she looks like an ugly cartoon character. i hate her voice I hate her face I hate her music I hate her everything.

  10. At least I can look at Katy without wondering what went wrong in the womb. There’s something wrong with Russell Brand that only thalidomide explains.

  11. Richard McBeef

    semen is actually a terrible lubricant for a fembot’s moving parts.

  12. yawn

    dumbest post in a while… less words please.

  13. Koilon

    Any bets on how long this marriage will last?

  14. She wants baby, get’s knocked up, guys won’t be attracted, teenies and tweenies won’t be able to relate, and he will start banging everything that moves. Like the Rev. Eddie Murphy once said: “When he comes into the room, the fish stop swimming.” Unless she shows off her sweatermeat and sex appeal her career will jump the shark fast (if it hasn’t already)

  15. puddleduck

    No cleavage? Did the world end? I guess she figured she would show her ass and save the boobs for another day….

  16. cc

    Russell Brand: Keith Richards with all the ‘interesting’ removed.

  17. ppl

    that’s an ugly man

  18. Toby Weymiller

    He is starting to show a little man cleavage though. Next time I hope he shows a nipple.

  19. Irony

    I would like to point out that Russell Brand is revealing more chest than Katy Perry.

  20. No2lames

    “It’s been two weeks since Katy Perry and Russell Brand were married in India and it feels like they fell off the face of the earth”

    One can only hope, I hate these talentless, vapid wastes of space.

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