Katy Perry and I Had Similar Childhoods

August 3rd, 2010 // 171 Comments

Katy Perry is featured in the latest issue of Rolling Stone (above) where she opens up about her religious upbringing that she’s apparently only slightly abandoned to pursue a more lucrative career shooting whipped cream out of her tits. I say slightly abandoned because she seems to see nothing wrong with her parents literally babbling at each other and pretending it’s divine communication. Via CNN:

The California girl, who has “Jesus” tattooed on her left wrist, tells the magazine, “Speaking in tongues is as normal to me as ‘Pass the salt..’ It’s a secret, direct prayer language to God.” Perry, 25, adds that her dad usually speaks in tongues while her mom plays interpreter. “That’s their gift,” she explains.
“I wasn’t able to say I was lucky because my mother would rather us say that we were blessed, and she also didn’t like that lucky sounded like Lucifer.”
In fact, the quirky brunette reveals, “I wasn’t allowed to eat Lucky Charms, but I think that was the sugar. I think my mom lied to me about that one.”

WARNING: If you’re looking for witty comments peppered with penis jokes and/or are easily offended when someone points out Jesus is a fictional character, now would be a good time to abandon the post.

For those of you who don’t know, I grew up in an evangelical household – my father’s a pastor – so allow me to explain how “speaking in tongues” works in case you’ve only ever lived in a world of logic and reason: It’s bullshit. Complete and utter bullshit. Basically, in the heat of spiritual frenzy, you start babbling incoherent gibberish because somewhere in the Bible it says that bystanders heard Jesus’ disciples praying in “foreign tongues.” Except what you see in churches across America is people pretending to be on a direct wavelength with God and given an opportunity to demonstrate that fact so everyone can see how super-Christian they are. Again, bullshit. Even more bullshitty is Katy Perry’s mom claiming she can interpret it. It’s babble. Literal babble. That’s like saying you can communicate fluently with infants in their own language. “Baby Jimmy thinks this episode of Sesame Street is as loquacious as it is pedantic. Also, poop.”

I literally feel for Katy Perry. When I was 25, I also had a sense of the real world but wasn’t quite able to accept my parents’ belief as the intellectually bankrupt, man-made constructs they are without compromising my love and respect for them. Except I at least had the luxury of attending a secular high school and college instead of Christian “schools,” so I understand the indoctrination runs way deeper here. Though apparently not deep enough to ward off premarital British cock. So maybe there’s hope here yet.

*climbs off soapbox*

Photos: Rolling Stone

superficial

  1. Slig

    Hello big boobs

  2. Sonja

    I doubt you have time to read all of these, but thank you anyway. I needed to read this this morning.

  3. Ed

    Nice timing on this post, fish. Yesterday on NPR’s All Things Considered, there was a piece about religious scientists. (disclosure, I’m not religious but my wife of 28 years is something of a Fundy. Proof that science and religion can coexist? Maybe/maybe not).

    http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=128959747

    Christian Academics Cite Hostility On Campus
    by Barbara Bradley Hagerty

    “When Elaine Howard Ecklund began asking top scientists whether they believe in God, she got a surprise. Ecklund, an assistant professor at Rice University and author of the book Science Vs. Religion, polled 1,700 scientists at elite universities. Contrary to the stereotype that most scientists are atheists, she says, nearly half of them say they are religious. But when she did follow up interviews, she found they practice a “closeted faith.”

    “They just do not want to bring up that they are religious in an academic discussion. There’s somewhat of almost a culture of suppression surrounding discussions of religion at these kinds of academic institutions,” Ecklund says.

    She says the scientists worried that their colleagues would believe they were politically conservative — or worse, subscribed to the theory of intelligent design. “

  4. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Neen
    Commented on this photo:

    she wishes she was actually that skinny

  5. freebie

    Why do we even have religion? Its the cause of most wars.

  6. PunkA

    Rumor has it that Katy loves it most when Russell speaks in tongues with her too. OR as us normal folk like to call it–cunnilingus. I think her moans help Russell interpret things just fine.

  7. Mr.Snide

    British Cock FTW

  8. Hausdrache

    So:

    According to Paul (from the letters of St. Paul); speaking and interpreting tongues is actually the least of the gifts of the Spirit. People make this big huge deal about being able to “speak” in tongues or interpret them, but honestly Paul constantly spoke out against that. He said it attracted negative attention and urged the budding Christian communities to focus on the higher gifts of the Spirit. (For those of you who are curious, the other gifts would be wisdom, knowledge, prophecy, faith, healing, working miracles and discerning spirits.)

    The Pentecostal movement in the United States is very big on speaking in tongues, interpreting tongues, and healing because they are the most visible and immediate gifts of the Spirit.

    Anyhow, if you’ve ever experience someone talking in tongues at you, it’s very disorienting at first. It’s also incredibly creepy when five people do it all at once.

  9. Donna

    Speaking in tongues is a gift of the Holy Spirit. I think it’s prayer. It cannot be interpreted, though. I believe it does actually happen, and also that people can fake it. But it is not something that should be made fun of.

    • Cock Dr

      Why can’t it be made fun of? Because you don’t like it being made fun of?
      I think it’s silly & possibly a symptom of hysteria.

    • Gift of the Tongue

      I like to “Speak with my Tongue” when I am eating pussy or licking tits & ass!
      I also only date women who “Speak with their Tongue” on my cock, balls & ass!

      ANYONE else want to share their favorite gift?

    • Jennay

      What you “think” does not matter. Look to the Bible, if you truly believe it, and see how speaking in tongues is used there.

  10. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Obvious
    Commented on this photo:

    give it up already. If this chick was really hot, she wouldn’t be marrying that goofball russel.

  11. JoeC

    makula jackula blaabba ram das poofi moofi cacca mooku

    That’s tongues for “Damn that bitch has some big ass, beautiful titties!”

  12. JoeC

    It really cracks me up that people are proselytizing on a site mainly dedicated to photos od famous bimbos in bikinis and crotch shots.

    • Jennay

      I can’t believe it’s happening, either! I have a new level of respect for the writer(s?) for bringing up an interesting, personal, confusing, and controversial topic!

  13. Jennay

    Wow, it was refreshing to have you genuinely explain an often-misunderstood and very confusing part of the Bible. I kept waiting for you to exaggerate or something, but you genuinely explained it and didn’t just refer everyone to Wikipedia.

    I believe that Christ died for me and is in charge of my life, and believe that the Bible is true. I also believe that many people who call themselves Christians are messed up and are not genuinely following God and do more damage to the label “Christian” than good. People who speak in tongues and think they have a special link to God because of that are not Biblically correct, and are babbling nonsense. In the Bible, speaking in tongues was not used very often, and was used to miraculously communicate with people who spoke many different languages. In other places in the New Testament, speaking in tongues was used only with an interpreter, and was for praising God, and not for teaching.

    Thanks again for speaking candidly about this. Katy’s childhood seems really messed up, and I’m sorry you had to experience such confusion, too!

  14. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    nat
    Commented on this photo:

    she’s looking like Megan Fox in this shoot.

  15. Damn! Who said boobs couldn’t bring forth deep, meaningful debate?

  16. Right on, Jennay. =)

    Katy Perry is a hot white girl who unfortunately buys into the whole ´speaking in tongues´ thing. Mr. Superficial & Katy Perry (Yeah right, ha) – i myself was also brought up in an evangelical household, and i can fully back up the ridiculous circle that it all is, *ESPECIALLY* the so-called ´speaking in tongues´ bit. It´s just as Mr. Superficial states it: A nonsensical religious ecstacy. People who supposedly ´translate´ it merely looking for attention from their congregations. I suppose i needed that experience, in order to fully disassociate myself from organized religion.

    Now, The Bibles *DOES* mention ´speaking in tongues´… and it makes it very clear that they who encountered the phenomenon all understood what was being said in their own language, even in their own dialect. Considering this, ´speaking in tongues´, as utilized in modern Christianity, is a sham.

  17. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    FRANK-LYNN
    Commented on this photo:

    I CAN’T WAIT TO ADD THIS ISSUE TO MY BATHROOM LIBRARY.

    SPLAT!

  18. Internet

    man-face

  19. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Nique
    Commented on this photo:

    You are not that skinny Katie

    • mafme

      No, that photo is either badly shot or photoshopped to hell and back. I don’t know why, it’s not like she’s fat or has an unattractive body. someone needs to stop letting straight women and gay men decide what it an ideally attractive body type is on a woman.

  20. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Bmaxim13
    Commented on this photo:

    2010..So far the Sexiest woman on EARTH!!!!!! xDD

  21. I just want to eat her ass and stop off by her pussy for a long bite to savior. Hot bitch from God. Amen…

  22. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Commented on this photo:

    Paint can in all. I will still bone…

  23. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Commented on this photo:

    This is her best pic…

  24. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Commented on this photo:

    Megan Fox is a scab on your ass. Katie you are so much more then Megan. Can I please eat your ass?

  25. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Commented on this photo:

    I knew I should have stayed in school. Fucking pot heads in the alley fucked my whole future.

  26. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    hmmm
    Commented on this photo:

    LAST!!! …….. hopefully?

  27. Kate

    Good on you Fish. I live in Australia which is a largely secular country, but there are of course still a few hardcore believers floating around. I can’t begin to imagine what it’s like to be force fed religion (my olds are very laid back), but I hope you still have a decent relationship with your parents. It’s a good thing that you’ve learnt to think for yourself and shape your own life outside of evangelism, because I believe that a benevolent God would want you to live a happy life, rather than one of mindless fear and suppression.

  28. reasonablegirl

    THANK YOU FOR THIS POST!! I am so sick and tired of everyone pretending religious faith/devotion is worthy of respect. I don’t respect crazies that stab people because talking dogs told them to, and I don’t respect crazies that tell me how to live, who to fuck (and how), and threaten me with hellfire if i don’t. A religious person IS NOT a moral person, and usually isn’t a reasonable or rational person.

    END THE MADNESS!! Hitchens, Harris, Dawkins, Dennett FTW.

    • So

      I think your refering to actual crazy people not the people you want to be crazy. I guess moral’s these days really don’t matter. And i guess most people here think they are the center of the universe. The universe is more complex then either a athiest or christian can understand. So im not going to pretend to know everything when i don’t. Science changes to much and most the time cause people want it to Global warming for instance is bullshit.

  29. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    LD
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow. Katy Perry is so amazingly beautiful.

    And btw it’s your God given right NOT to believe in God so embrace it!

  30. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    mafme
    Commented on this photo:

    I know it’s wrong, but I looked at this picture and said to myself, “Oooo. I totally want that digital back!”

  31. free to have an opinion

    i am very sad that people dont respect others enuf to understand that my choices are not urs and urs are not mine. i am sure that if u had ever spoken in tongues urself u would have a very different view on what was or was not real…i dont down any one else’s experiences why is it neccesary for u as someone who does not believe to degrade the beliefs of others…i just dont get it. everyone wants equality but when it comes down to everyone having their own opinion somehow when christians have one they are crazy or idiots whereas when u have urs ur logical…its no more logical to me that we evolved from apes that there is something out there bigger than ourselves who caused all of this to be…its sad that we cant respect each other enuf to realize that people at the end of the day are tryin to find meaning in this life and to many that throughGod…

  32. Logan

    Beautiful pictures…

  33. missywissy

    Okay, so back to Katy Perry. Faith Hill took a photo just like this one. Bikini walking through a door with beads. They should do a side by. It’s in one of her album cover books.

  34. captain america

    …………..every young girl needs a DILDO & GIRLFRIENDS.
    (no assholes)

  35. PLEASE

    Honestly this women acts like her shit smells like roses.

    GROW THE FUCK UP, KATY PERRY (not even your real name). And quit wanting to be being the world’s biggest hypocrite, leave that to someone who OBVIOUSLY DOES A BETTER JOB THAN YOU CAN.

    She is LUCKY to be where she is now and god know how that happened.

    AS SOON AS SHE SEES ANOTHER BETTER MORE TALENTED ARTIST, LADY GAGA, MILEY CYRUS (WHOM IM NOT A FAN OF BUT AT LEAST SHE HAS SOME SORT OF TALENT) PASSING HER ASS UP SHE IS QUICK TO THROW USELESS IMMATURE INSULTS VIA HER STUPID TWITTER THAT SHE CANNOT EVEN SPELL PROPERLY.

    enjoy your 15 minutes, bitch… and your advised to take care of your tits because those are gonna be your sole financial support once Russell Brand finds someone else to stick his penis into.

    ok i’m done

  36. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    gav
    Commented on this photo:

    TITS

  37. Jenny

    I am SO HAPPY that the posts made by atheists seem to outweigh the posts made by religious nutbags. I would love to run a research study in which I coded all of the posts for spelling and grammatical errors and then regressed these scores on to the religious beliefs/ non-beliefs presented in the text. No prizes for guessing which group would have more errors.

    • So

      So basicly your a bitch right lol that knows everything lol give me a fucking break. I have not seen a atheist on here that wants to debate they just want to go bashing christians and anybody else because they are so damn smart. Blah Blah fucking blah is all i have heard along elitism of course. Cause you seem to think people who believe that their is something more out there are crazy just because a bunch of crazy so called christians go out and do crazy crap. Your stereotyping which i guess is easy considering the amount of nut’s in every religion atheism included cause it should just as well be one because it certainly sounds like a religion.

  38. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    lizzy
    Commented on this photo:

    i could not hate this girl more. talking about jesus and god and the bible while naked wearing fishnets. fucking hypocrite talentless hag. so fucking ugly too. big tits do not cancel out her stupidity, bad music, or ugly face

    FUCK THIS LOSER.

  39. TussTown

    Only a Katy Perry post such as this would spark a debate like this

  40. Katy Perry is a toad.

  41. i like boobies

    stop fighting,just enjoy katy perry’s tits

  42. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Joden
    Commented on this photo:

    BUTTERFACE?!
    Not at all dude

  43. hell is earth

    the reason Jesus exists is to use him as a scapegoat out of taking responsibility for ones own actions in life…”oh well Jesus died for me so I can sit back and treat people like crap if I want as long as I believe” I can ignore the sick and hungry and focus on getting as much crap and materials in this life because the more junk I have the more meaning I have in this world…. all the while the world is going to hell many children are suffering and dying but thats not my problem….FOR IT IS GODS WILL!!! And let it be so…what am I gonna do about it? I’m not responsible for all the greed and suffering in this world///thats the devils fault!!!! What an easy way out…humans are such cowards…they let the government take there money and spend trillions of it on war and fighting when we could be using to make the world better…it makes me sick…and people are happy with being slaves to the system..going to there shitty jobs. supporting the agenda to make earth as greedy and shitty of a place as possible. Hand over your lives to the government…let them take your money and use it for the downfall of mankind… instead of working together and taking responsibility of the situations going on on earth….lets wait till it gets sooo freaking hellish on earth that somebody has to come save us from ourselves because we don’t want to have common sense and actually use our natural problem solving skills…we want to have some invisible man take the blame for all the shit…PERFECT…what kind of fucking lesson does Gods children learn from that???What kind of parent uses that strategy.

  44. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    Funny
    Commented on this photo:

    Just another whore. We only care if we can actually see her kissing girls. My wife and I might do her though.

  45. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    yowillie
    Commented on this photo:

    She needs a pearl necklace.

  46. Jack

    That last unphoto shopped pic shows what a terrible body she has.

    Dumb right wing Christian cunt is all she is.

  47. Blech

    “Baby Jimmy thinks this episode of Sesame Street is as loquacious as it is pedantic. Also, poop.”

    FISH, that is classic.

    Also, please get on your soapbox more often. Thanks.

  48. Katy Perry in Rolling Stone
    dee
    Commented on this photo:

    Really butched her midsection in this picture..her stomach is not that flat naturally and they are stupid for trying to make it so.

  49. katy perry nip slip in “california gurls”? maybe i’m wrong.

    http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4023/4518851428_a8dc195cee_o.jpg @ 2:06

  50. backdoorreligion

    You post about celebrity boobs, upskirt, sloppy seconds…people are ‘eh.”

    Post about the Jesus, however, and everyone goes batshit crazy!

    Christianity must be the most hated religion ever. Mention Hindu, Buddhism or Islam and everyone is chill. Even Judaism doesn’t stir as much crap as the Jesus. Is the Jesus that bad of a person/thing? is Christianity so evil you have to hate? This intrigues me so….

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