Katy Perry and Russell Brand Already Need Therapy

February 9th, 2011 // 95 Comments

“You like my Chupacabra, puta? I trim it for Hey-soos.”

Probably because every marriage around them is being revealed as the meaningless publicity stunts they were always intended to be, Katy Perry and Russell Brand have reportedly started seeing a counselor, according to Life & Style:

Three months into their marriage, Katy Perry and Russell Brand may already be hitting a bump. In January, just weeks before launching her worldwide tour, Katy “started asking friends to recommend a marriage counselor,” an insider tells Life & Style.
… When Russell filmed Arthur over the summer, “Katy was around all the time,” a set insider tells Life & Style. For the film’s recent reshoots, however, “She hasn’t been by,” the insider confirms.

Of course, none of this should be surprising considering we’re talking about a, somehow, devout Christian who spreads the gospel via huge breasts and a British heroin addict who used to have threesomes for breakfasts. The two of them had no business being together in the first place, yet we’re not going to let two dudes get married because that’s what’s gonna make the whole institution look bad. I had no idea consensual butt sex trumped an inevitable divorce fueled by opiates and gonorrhea, but then again, I’m not a priest. Is the anus the pathway to Satan? I was never any good with Scripture.

Photos: Splash News


  1. wim

    I was already convinced of the fact about two years ago……..
    these people make a profession out of CHEATING PEOPLE.

    so they’re a true shame to the entertainmenr industry in general.

  2. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Dick Hertz
    Commented on this photo:

    Take a good look at those lips…… about the size of a quarter…. Hmmn…. bet that about the size of it…. My eyes would probably look like Marty Feldman, trying to get my business in her neighborhood,,,,,,

  3. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Commented on this photo:

    Katy Perry has an ugly face. She’s lucky she has tits, otherwise she wouldn’t be famous.

  4. stupidficial

    R u sure she doesn’t already have something from him? It would explain these pics.

  5. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Commented on this photo:

    How can a human being make this face yet show no wrinkles?

  6. dead peter

    So… Katy Perry’s breasts just smothered that fat girl’s chihuahua. Katy points and laughs. This is what’s happening here, right?

  7. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s wrong with her left arm?

  8. mike

    The crying girl’s T-shirt says, “Faty P…..” WTF

  9. Cardinal Fang

    Where did my “You can almost see Katy Perry’s hairy” comment go?

  10. Dude

    The writer should do his/her homework. Katy voted against Prop 8 in California…so they’ll have to rewrite that ramble at the end of the article.

    Newsflash: Not EVERY story in the world has a gay marriage connection.

  11. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Commented on this photo:

    I do not understand the appeal around this woman. She looks like your typical plastic whore. The only difference is that she’s a brunette. If she were a blond, she’d look like the seemingly infinite number of nasty porn stars the internet produces.

  12. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Commented on this photo:

    Mes and Hims bend married urfteen weeks now!

  13. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this from the Snooki-lookalike contest?

  14. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Commented on this photo:

    What’s in that little box?

  15. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Commented on this photo:

    Perry: “Hey look! Russ’ watch just fell out!”

  16. snapdragon

    “Bite my boot!”

  17. Katy Perry Russell Brand
    Commented on this photo:

    *miley cyrus salvia face, y’all*

Leave A Comment