Katt Williams: ‘Kirk Cameron is Brilliant, Stephen Hawking is Just a Cripple’

May 18th, 2011 // 78 Comments

For those of you hoping for a Heavenly warrior to ride forth and end the battle between Kirk Cameron and Stephen Hawking by proving there’s unquestionably one true Lord above, your prayers have been answered. — Ha! Just kidding. Katt Williams just said a bunch of crazy shit to TMZ. Oh my god, you should’ve seen your faces:

“Kirk Cameron is brilliant. Stephen Hawking is a role model to everybody who has flesh. And if he believes in God, then he’s right. And if he doesn’t believe in God, then he’s just another crippled guy with a bad idea. … God still runs this earth, Satan’s breath still stinks, Charlie Sheen still doin’ crack and Katt Williams is still the funniest black man you’ve ever seen.”

Dammit! It’s almost impossible to argue with anything he just said. I mean, a Charlie Sheen doing crack joke and calling Stephen Hawking a cripple? He truly is the funniest black man I’ve ever seen. *lays down comedy sword, kneels* Your word is my command, Lord Williams. I ride only for thee.

Photos: Splash News

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  1. Katt Williams Kirk Cameron Stephen Hawking
    MisterSuccint
    Commented on this photo:

    I might have paid attention to the rambling if this was Kat Dennings.
    Or Kat McPhee.
    Or even Cat Stevens.

  2. MisterSuccint

    I might have paid attention to the rambling if this was Kat Dennings.
    Or Kat McPhee.
    Or even Cat Stevens.

  3. Richard McBeef

    Katt’s style of pimpin’ bitches and smoking weed is the exactly the type of Christian Values that we need in America.

  4. Deacon Jones

    Coming from someone who was arrested in the parking lot of a Walmart for an altercation between and mom and son, and given his repertoire of hits, such as “It’s Pimpin’ Pimpin’” and “Pimp Chronicles, Part 1″…..

    ….I’m willing to bet he’s right.

  5. Jill

    haha, AWESOME!

  6. Yeezy's Son

    What a douche. I believe in God but i’m sure He doesn’t agree in calling Stephen Hawkings “just a cripple.” The Hawkings developped Lou Gehrig’s disease while in his 20s attending university. Not fun. Have a little more respect. The Jesus in the Bible was compassionate and caring to all people, especially “cripples.” I believe Hawkings is wrong for saying categorically that there is no heaven, but I’ll leave it up for God to decide.

  7. Ole one eye Rough

    Today is a milestone in comedy.

  8. Katt, I can’t say for certain one way or another if god exists or not. I do know though, if he does exist…your god is a fucking dick.

  9. Chinny

    Stephen Hawking is clearly wrong because God gave him some incurable affliction and he gave Kirk Cameron and Katt Williams millions of dollars.

    BOOM, argue with that, Science.

    • Randal(l)

      Katt spends 93% of those millions on relaxer, which was invented by science

      BOOM….I think

    • Meme

      crippled? one of the most intelligent minds in the world and a simple search would show he’s worth a few million…

  10. KNOBGOBBLER3

    I don’t care what anybody says. That cripple’s one hot piece of ass! Boom shaka laka laka boom!

  11. somethingoriginal

    Who?

    • Wootang

      Will someone tell me who Katt Williams is? I don’t want to google him lest this stupidity generate him anymore buzz.

  12. trousers

    It’s RAAAAAAAAAAAAANDY

  13. “Katt Williams is still the funniest black man you’ve ever seen.”

    Really? Katt Williams wouldn’t even qualify as the funniest white man i’ve ever seen. He’d barely place on the scale of funniest female comedians, right behind Margaret Cho, but before Janeane Garofalo.

  14. uncle ruckus

    Word.

  15. Snoop Dogg should stick to rapping.

  16. Shaftzits

    Hawkings crippled body has more talent than katt and his whole family combined. i hope he is very disappointed when he dies.

  17. MisterSuccint

    It’s the Tards versus the Crips in the new series “Handicap Wars”.

  18. Cock Dr

    I see through this nasty loser’s ploy to garner media attention.

  19. Mel

    A Pimp Named Slickback.

    • Jovy

      A Pimp named Dumbass. No one finds this man funny, let alone hilarious. The only people who claim to enjoy his stand up are those who feel sorry for him.

  20. Billy Dee Williams needs to shut up and just keep selling that Colt 45…

  21. M3Essential

    wait a minute! how the hell is that cup of ‘beer’ not spilling? I call shenanigans on Fakey McFaker up there!!

  22. taz

    2 useless motherfu@#ers spouting a bunch of shit! Religion is only about power, them exerting it over a bunch of morons. Religion has caused more problems in the world. Now if you talk faith it is another ball game. You can have faith and not be a religious fanatical asshole that discounts anything scientific since it goes against the bible (or koran or whatever you want to put here). These things can co-exist……….And yes christian fanatics are just as bad as muslim ones so f%^k you!!!

  23. Well, you wanted science. Gangsta’ just dropped some on ya’. Daaaaaaaaaaaaamn.

  24. Matcher

    “Kirk Cameron is brilliant.”??!! Well then you sir, are a useless ni… ncompoop.

  25. TheClap

    Really Katt? That’s just like claiming you are just about as stupid as cretin.
    Funny thing how Hawking is still more fluent than him, even without a computer speech program.

  26. Richard Pryor

    Nothin’ says class like a plastic glass.

  27. Katt Williams Kirk Cameron Stephen Hawking
    David Duke
    Commented on this photo:

    The Klan needs to stop buying that cheap assed Chinese rope from Walmart.

  28. Why is he wearing ear rings? How can he expect to be taken seriously when he’s dressed like a woman. RIngs and a necklace too. It screams gay. It’s like little kids playing dress-up, all the big boys laugh at them.

  29. Katt Williams Kirk Cameron Stephen Hawking
    bob
    Commented on this photo:

    This dude is one of the least funny comics ever, fuck this shit

  30. Katt Williams Kirk Cameron Stephen Hawking
    bob
    Commented on this photo:

    this shit too

  31. shithead

    Religion is the neurosis of mankind.

  32. fooey

    Well he wanted to endorse Trump but since that ship’s sailed…

  33. God

    I have to come down on the side of Stephen Hawking on this one. As TheSuperficial’s resident God, I have come to the conclusion that I do, in fact, not exist.
    I have played mental ping-pong about this for quite some time. For awhile, meaning when I was addicted to cough medicine, I was pretty sure that none of you existed and I created all of you in my mind. That I was a solitary lonely in the Universe, a being that created everything and the world around me to entertain myself with one massive delusion to help the time pass.

    It made sense at the time that you were all figures of light just playing out in my mind and that I could not prove you existed. Just a bunch of chemical transactions taking place inside of me creating you, what you look like etc… even how I felt about you, just chemical interactions creating this reality. With this logic, I created both Stephen Hawking and Katt Williams in mind or likenesses of them.
    BUT THEN, I realized, wait a second, they might actually exist themselves. I dubbed this based on Descartes: Cartesian Interactive Dualism.
    They existed on their own, I existed on my own. They made up their reality, they were their own God of their reality, afterall, through brain chemistry, they were the creators, hence God of their reality.
    I simply interacted with them in an interactive way. Both Gods, both existing, just impossible to exist in the same reality.

    THEN, I realized after explaining this to people. People stopped talking to me. So I think I do not exist anymore.

    It would be nice if Fish at least confirmed to me that I do exist with a reply. That way we can all know one way or another if God exists or not. Fuck Stephen Hawking. Fish has the final say on this matter. I shall await confirmation my friends/hallucinations

  34. God

    I think I just lost my mind, I am either making up everything in my reality based on biochemical reactions or awaiting confirmation of my existance via pixels on a screen in front of me.
    And WTF if there is no such thing as biochemicals or pixels.

    Off to the funny farm I am skipping all the way LAlaLaLALa! Is it really a farm, does funny really exist? What is blue to a colorblind person? laLAlalAlla!
    What is color to Mary who can see color but kept in a room her whole life that is gray? laAllalalaa!
    Am I just a brain in a vat lalalaalaAla!

    The following is a message from the Real God, the God you have been reading is experiencing technical difficulties and will be taken offline for a hold for a 5150 hold. You are free to think he does exist or not exist, I have created those options for you

  35. Tracey

    I have no idea who this asshead is. I’m gonna skip over the white people comments and go directly to the “funniest black man”
    Red Foxx, Richard Pryor, Dave Chappell, any Wayans brother, my next door neighbor. He doesn’t know who you are either.

  36. Arzach

    Who the fuck is this tool?

  37. s'up bitches

    This is why The United States is 25th in Math and 24th in Science out of the 30 most developed countries. We keep entertaining assholes like Kat what-ever-the-fuck-his-last-name-is and Cameron, we will be dead last folks. Dead last.

    • uncle ruckus

      Yeah…it has nothing to do with our horrible education system that continually churns out mindless drones who are lapped by their counterparts from India and Asia.

      • s'up bitches

        I’m pretty sure it’s the other way around. Think about that the next time you go see a doctor, idiot.

  38. puddleduck

    Katt is a comedian people. He makes jokes. Get over it, lighten up, and get the fuck on with it. We told Helen Keller jokes in grade school…I guess that was politically incorrect too. Big shit.

    • Corbijn Von Doom

      Then give Katt some of the same grief Godfrey was given over his remarks about Japan. Yeah, he’s a comedian but there is also a line. You shouldn’t be able to call anyone a “cripple” as an argument without people getting offended; let alone calling this to one of the smartest people in the world.

  39. eman

    Exterminate this hood rat.

  40. I_HEART_HUCKABEES

    Katt Who? Why in the motherfucking hell should I care what some black douchebag who thinks dressing like street trash is cool says?

    This is EXACTLY why AmeriDUH is the laughing stock of planet earth. If Einstein were alive these right-wing “christian” death cultists would probably call him a heathen as well…ooh he’s a Jew so he’s already part of Satan’s Synagogue, right Kirk? Remember, Captain Kirk and his ass-buddy Ray Comfort made a video trying to claim the banana is an example of “Gawd’s Work (TM)” not realizing that the banana is a result of man’s work engineering the plantane. But I’m sure Ray thought they were eating bananas on Noah’s fucking non-existant Ark, a story the Bibullshit ripped off almost word for word from the Epic of Gilgamesh, which is at least 1000 years older than the bullshit “Old Testament.”

    Christianity is a death cult followed by mental weaklings like Kirk and this shithead. 50 years from now, not only will we be still here on this planet, we’ll be laughing at Kirk and his cultists, and the scientific cultists looking for the non-existant “gawd particle” over at CERN. The Higgs Boson is just as much a fantasy as Kirk’s big sky daddy.

    IT’S FUCKING FUNNY that these shitheads speak out about Hawking’s comments, but I haven’t heard Kirk or Pimp Daddy Shithead there saying anything about the cultists claiming JEEEEEEEEEEBUS is coming back this saturday. WHAT’S THE MATTER KIRK, did your “god” not send you the memo?

    • SayWhat?

      No, most people can laugh at jokes. The reason America is a joke is because of stoopid hicks like you, who sit in their trailer scarfing their face with fatty foods from Walmart and writing 5 paragraph thesis about… nothing, that nobody even bothered to read thru the entire redundant…

    • puddleduck

      Get a life. You’ve got way too much time on your hands.

    • Corbijn Von Doom

      They speak out because: 1) Hawking is one of the smartest people on the planet and 2) They get all defensive when the smartest man on the planet refutes something they believe. Get out your history book and you will read that Einstein did get a lot of grief from Christians because of the things he said and the things he believed in. There was actually a group of Christians who were so offended with Einstein, they wanted him deported back to Germany while the Nazi’s were still in power. So much for good old Christian values.

      Anyway, SayWhat? slapped you like a bitch already. Just wanted to pour some salt on the wound.

  41. Katt Williams Kirk Cameron Stephen Hawking
    Laberoon
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought he was an R’n'B singer…. am I allowed to think that?

  42. adolf hitler

    based on books chosen by religious nuts

  43. blackhole

    Who the fuck is Katt Williams?

    No… seriously. Who is he?

  44. Corbijn Von Doom

    What happens when one of the smartest men on the Earth is compromised by one of the dumbest arguments responses to something he says? I’d be surprised if Hawking couldn’t muster the strength to slap Williams like the bitch he is.

  45. David

    Religious people and blacks should not make comments about philosophy or god. Nothing against them, but….

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