Katie Price, okay, seriously, what the hell?

Katie “Jordan” Price made a promotional stop at Harrod’s for her newest children’s book “Mermaids and Pirates: Follow the Fish.” That’s right: Katie Price wrote a children’s book. The main characters of the book are Katie the Mermaid and Peter the Pirate – as in Peter Andre her husband. And she made him a pirate. Wow. Anyway, Katie keeps churning out novels like Stephen King if he were a stripper. I’m really curious who her publisher is because this guy is either legally retarded or an old pervert that’s mental for boobies. (No, it’s not me.) I’m talking a love so deep he doesn’t care about scarring children for life and therefore deserves the Nobel Prize. No, wait, make that two Nobel Prizes. And a Pulitzer. Yeah, one of those.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Getty Images, Splash News