Katie Holmes really likes Nicole Kidman and is apparently happy about about her pregnancy. She recently sent Nicole some sweet baby gifts in hopes that, the next time they meet, Nicole won’t throw a boomerang at her face. Those things fucking sting. Star reports:
Katie shipped hubby Tom Cruise’s eight-months-pregnant ex-wife a deluxe gift basket filled with onesies, stuffed toys, a baby blanket and more from Neiman Marcus in Beverly Hills, an insider tells Star.
“Katie wanted the best of everything in the basket,” the insider says. “It cost over $2,000.”
Also included was a letter that read: “Dear Nicole, please enjoy these lovely tokens of my affection and do write back. Maybe even include a description of what intercourse is like because I’ve completely forgotte…” Then there was a bunch of scribbles from the “Free-thinking Wife Suppresso-tron” firing off in Katie’s head. Tom installed it on their honeymoon by simply walking into her ear. So, technically, their marriage was consummated by some form of penetration. I stand corrected.
ujca | June 20, 2008 at 2:42 pm
shit
veggi | June 20, 2008 at 2:43 pm
FIRST you TB-infested oozing cunts
hi | June 20, 2008 at 2:45 pm
2nd?
Randal | June 20, 2008 at 2:45 pm
I think that’s very big of Katie to do, knowing the situations that Kidman and Cruise have had in the past.
This clearly shows how well of a woman Katie is becoming and just how she respects Kidman as a person and a well defined actress.
Katie has surprised many folks since first appearing on Dawson’s Creek and continues to shine as she matures.
Good on you my dear.
Randal
Bill Clinton | June 20, 2008 at 2:48 pm
I hope Nicole sends a nice thank you note that says “SCIENTOLOGY IS A DANGEROUS CULT. Run Katie Run!!!!” But I know Katie’s many OSA handlers intercept and filter all her correspondences so it’s a long shot.
veggi | June 20, 2008 at 2:48 pm
@2 you are a cute little monkey!!
and hahaha fish!! “walked into her ear!” That’s great stuff!!
You back yet Ted?? And where’s p0nk today??
Penetration | June 20, 2008 at 2:49 pm
That was a good one! Thanks again. ha ha ha ha ha ha.
Katie Holmbot | June 20, 2008 at 2:52 pm
Dear Nicole,
Here are some gifts for your baby. Congratulations!
Love always,
Tom
p.s. Say, have you stumbled across those Polaroids yet? If you did, I’d really appreciate it if you destroyed them, or better yet sent them to me. Really, it was quite a lark, playing naked Twister with the fellas, and what are the odds that each of them would fall into me like that as if taking turns? I should give those pictures to the Smithsonian, is what I should do! So do you have them, seriously? Yes? No? Ok, well, you have my address…
bernie | June 20, 2008 at 2:57 pm
Do the Scientologists have a time-machine? Because Katie looks like Marty McFly’s mother.
Anonymous | June 20, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Randal:
You’re a Tinkerbell. See a doctor.
NATALIE | June 20, 2008 at 2:58 pm
WHY IS KATIE DRESSED LIKE A 40 YR OLD MORMON? YUCK.
blacky | June 20, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Remember the good ol’ days…
http://www.gagreport.com/Funny_Pictures/Katie%20Holmes/katie_holmes_42.jpg
Nathiest | June 20, 2008 at 2:58 pm
wait…. Nicole is pregnant?
Uncle Eccoli | June 20, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Wow, $2,000?! That must have broken the bank, huh?
Tommy Sneakers | June 20, 2008 at 3:03 pm
Tom looks like he’s been shrunken
JM | June 20, 2008 at 3:08 pm
She’s really starting to look Holmely.
Thank you, I’ll be here all week.
FRIST!!! | June 20, 2008 at 3:11 pm
I love the retarded veggi troll..
havoc | June 20, 2008 at 3:14 pm
She’s just covering all her bases. One of the volcanoes that our alien predecessors are stored in is actually in Australia. You can’t have too many friends down under.
True story.
.
Lola | June 20, 2008 at 3:20 pm
Oh wow, I commend her for doing that. It was really thoughtful and considerate of her to do….. I have a new level of respect for her for doing that.
qwertygirl | June 20, 2008 at 3:26 pm
“So, technically, there marriage was consummated…” Their marriage, not there marriage.
Lipper | June 20, 2008 at 3:36 pm
TCLTC! TCLTC!!!
Nuff said.
Matthew | June 20, 2008 at 3:38 pm
Free Katie,also TCLTC
p0nk | June 20, 2008 at 3:53 pm
further evidence that scientology has eaten Katie’s brain – she’s adopting the facial expressions of Heidi Montag.
good afternoon, veggi.
TCLTC
Icantbelievemyeyes | June 20, 2008 at 3:59 pm
His tie knot is huge!!!!
Trover | June 20, 2008 at 4:14 pm
Dear Nicole,
PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!??? YOU DID IT AND I NEED TO KNOW HOW!!!! PLEASE TELL ME HOW YOU ESCAPED FROM THE MIDGET TC AND THE CLUTCHES OF XENU??? SAVE ME PLEASE!!!!!!!!
Your friend,
Kate
P.S. Got some goodies for your new baby. Enjoy!
norton | June 20, 2008 at 4:32 pm
I’m surprised the Xenu king hasn’t quashed this vid///
http://video.search.yahoo.com/video/play?p=katie+holmes+flash&ei=UTF-8&fr=yfp-t-501&tnr=21&vid=000116561246
NotTom'sBaby | June 20, 2008 at 4:38 pm
Baby mania! At least Nicole Kidman’s baby daddy is probably actually her husband. Tom cruise has never seen nicole or katie naked, much less had anything to do with their vaginas. these kids on The Baby Borrowers are more legit parents, haha.
Tom | June 20, 2008 at 5:17 pm
What happened to Katie? She used to be so fucking hot.
Is it a coincidence that when she got involved with scientology, her career started drying up? I don’t think it is.
Oh well, at least I got to see her tits before her career tanked.
mamadough | June 20, 2008 at 5:21 pm
if i was nichole, i would set the damn thing on fire as soon as it arrived. did the same thing with some ugly ass clogs a friend of mine passed off to me. used an entire bottle of hairspray, w-d 40, and some gasoline.
Do_FreeBird | June 20, 2008 at 5:38 pm
That mouth opens so wide, and that tounge looks so inviting. Shame all that warm, wet, probing, fleshy goodness is being wasted on Tom Cruise.
I know my throbbing purple veined member would know just what to do.
And as always …………………… TCLTC
slewis046@rogers.com | June 20, 2008 at 7:07 pm
The people writing these rants must be pretty sick, or dumb, you are believing the idiot who wrote this junk . wake up, do you honestly believe this???
I still believe Nicole is an Alien that landed in the US desert somewhere.
Keith, a few light years later. They are both addicted to Botax. Can you imagine those two going at it??? At least Katie & Tom can laugh and smile.
koidfs | June 20, 2008 at 7:57 pm
He has classic gay face. Deal with it, Thomasina. You are as gay as Liberace’s tinkerbell embroidered hot pink chiffon sequined lace mini-skirt.
wundersmack | June 20, 2008 at 8:49 pm
Shut up! Tom is NOT gay. He’s SUPER-GAY.
Gra | June 20, 2008 at 9:22 pm
whater is with the freakin cardigan worn under the suit coat ??? how uber – gay is that. And Katie’s even doing that old scientology “wrinkle the nose while you pretend to be happy” thing that her husband has taught her.. I guess he’s still got his arm soldered to her waist just to pretend to be straight.
ja | June 20, 2008 at 9:36 pm
Ya She is laughing like him now.
So creepy.
dude | June 20, 2008 at 9:37 pm
haha this pic is funny she looks twice his size
kat | June 21, 2008 at 12:33 am
Ahaha, yeah ja, Katie is totally laughing like him.
Compare it to this picture of Tom…
http://www.imdb.com/media/rm4096957184/nm0000173
It’s uncanny!
sally | June 21, 2008 at 2:32 am
I heard they met each at a single club called —–Blackwhitemeet.com——- is it true? Can I find my love there?
Gra | June 21, 2008 at 3:20 am
yep, he definitely cloned her from his own gay zenu sperm
Lily | June 21, 2008 at 10:54 am
Mmmmm, it seems he is very interested in dating wealthy young woman. I saw him on “S e e k i n g R i c h . c o m ” last week.
gerard Vandenberg | June 21, 2008 at 1:02 pm
sorry, I have to PUKE!!
Toonkinstein | June 21, 2008 at 11:56 pm
…and the “basket was dropped off at the Goodwill Bin shortly after it was delivered by UPS with the note “FOOK THIS!!”
L Ron Hoover | June 22, 2008 at 8:25 am
Wow, here mouth gets really big. I bet she uses it on the Rod of Xenu!
L Ron Hoover | June 22, 2008 at 8:25 am
Wow, her mouth gets really big. I bet she uses it on the Rod of Xenu!
L Ron Hoover | June 22, 2008 at 8:25 am
Wow, her mouth gets really big. I bet she uses it on the Rod of Xenu!
Corey | June 22, 2008 at 12:13 pm
Katie is starting to look like a man with a wig on.
That’s usually what happens to tall girls once they pass 25.
Greg Brady | June 23, 2008 at 3:21 am
I used to own a beautiful, expensive, bird once. It got sick and the feather’s came off. (GROADY). I did not want to admit to myself that it was using meth.. I was in total denial… Then eventually, it had scabby bird-meth leisions all over it…and no teeth. Nobody wanted to touch the damn thing, and I ended throwing the entire cage out…. (once bird was dead). Maybe it would have lived if we could afford rehab for the bird….but we could not. :(
Strip her of those 23 hr make-up sessions (everyday) that TRY (unsuccessfully) to make Amy Winehouse look normal, and I ‘m pretty sure that I would still rather have made out with the bird meth-addict, rather than Amy Winehouse. That bird still looked better then she does the day it tyed-up for it’s last fatal hit…
MY THEORY:
I would REALLY like to know how my pet bird was affording all that meth every day!! Was Amy suppling it so I’d go for HER instead!!? Dear Amy: You have become a skinny sick, scab-encrusted, Bird-chicken-girl. Leave other people’s pets alone Amy!! Mary Kate, be CAREFUL!! Your starting to look a little chicken-like too..
just4fun | June 23, 2008 at 9:31 am
I like her smile very much, and seems saw someone who looks like her on **casualpal.com_, that’s really wonderful for casual encounters.
just4kicks | June 23, 2008 at 9:48 am
You just know that Katie is going to disappear for a while now. Tom will need to have her re-brainwashed. How dare she communicate unsupervised with anyone let alone that catholic bitch who would not be controlled!
Tommy smurf will not be happy.
Hippo | June 23, 2008 at 9:25 pm
Why does Katie look like a braying donkey? Creepy.