Tom Cruise has signed Katie Holmes up to a company called Buff Brides to get her in shape in preparation for their wedding this year. A source tells the Daily Mirror:
“Katie can and will do it… She has great motivation. She loves her fiance and was proud that Tom oversaw this programme. He told her he wanted her to be the most beautiful bride ever. She was in tears when he said that.”
Buff Brides? He might as well have sent her to a place called Man Camp or The Sex Change Insitute of America. It doesn’t matter how much muscle Katie puts on, Tom needs to realize nothing will ever compare to that special night in the woods he first felt the soft caress of a steroid-pumped man in a thong.
[Tom needs to realize nothing will ever compare to that special night in the woods he first felt the soft caress of a steroid-pumped man in a thong.]
I literally spit water all over my keyboard when I read that. Kudoes!
BTW, TCLTC.
I love it. She CAN and WILL do it. Of course she will, because she is brainwashed and will do anything Tom tells her to.
Brian falls to his knees, throws his hands up in the air in the middle of a rainstorm and screams.
Brian:
Curse you Ron L. Hubbard….. Curse you!!!!!!!!
Ok, you get the point.
wow, they admitted she was in tears. she “can and will do it”? yeah, or it’s her ass… no one would treat a young woman who gave birth to her first child 2 weeks before like this. she would need to recuperate. being buff shouldn’t be the priority. parenthood should.
she was in tears not bc it touched her, but bc she has to please him, to give him this public, perfect fantasy wedding that will give them both publicity for a few years to come!
that was the deal, and she better deliver.
she has to look good in the photos. that is the most important thing.
ps: TRIPLE FIRST.
wow, does he actually think that is normal? if i had just ‘given birth’ i would kick my boyfriend’s butt if he told me to get to the gym, nevermind putting me in a programme called Buff Brides. What bride wants to be buff???? beautiful, slender, fit…yes; buff…no way!
http://celebrityreligion.typepad.com
You know what? If this dickloving retard had let her breastfeed, the weight would have melted off her, and she’d just need some power walking and yoga. Been there, done that. Buff says it all. Buff as in manly.
I cannot tear my eyes away from the trainwreck tom cruise has become…
The Cock loves Tom Cruise.
lol
So way twisted.
Sad motherfucker.
That is all.
anyone else notice that his mic is perfectly angled like an erect cock and his mouth is wide open, in a bit of an excited, cum-whorish smile?
also, his hand is in a fist. I shouldn’t have to explain this one.
either he’s thinking of his romp with K-Fed later on that night or he’s eager for everyone to photoshop this picture into a cocksucking masterpiece.
Here is a snippet from a review of MI3 from USA Today
The love story is the movie’s weakest link; there is little chemistry between Cruise and Monaghan.
Gee, theres a shock, maybe if she had a hairy chest and a nice package Tom would have been able to get up some Chemistry for her onscreen.
To all of the TC supporters, cut your shit out. You’re all passive aggressive and your goal is to annoy everyone. Tom loves the cock, Katie is a Stepford Wife in the making, and their “child” will be appearing on a very special episode of Oprah in 2020.
Man… this get more and more weird every day… Before she knows it she’ll be lying on a sex-change clinic bed while Tom happily chooses a Jumbo sized dong for her. Wont that be a nice show: Pimp My Wife. Can’t wait.
BTW am I the only one annoyed by this Edna Bambrick woman harrassing so many websites? Anyway, after checking out her Yahoo profile (http://profiles.yahoo.com/edna_bambrick) and realising how humongously big she is… I have only one thing to say… GLUTTONY IS A CAPITAL SIN OH EDNA BAMBRICK! SHAME ON YOU! HOW DARE YOU IMPART YOUR WISDOM WHILE SO DISGUSTINGLY TAINTED?
On a happier note TCLT, so does Edna but she can’t grab one with her chubby hands… :-p
WTF??!! OK, every time theirs a Tom cruise news my first reaction is always what the fuck!!!
Fucking seriously, Katie is fat now? She would make the most beautiful bride? ok, so in his perspective she’s an ugly bitch if she gains weight.
WHY NOT A vaginal recostruction too while he’s at it?
she gave birth, nothing is the same – Tom Cruise
She’s an idiot, either she likes to be commanded and needs a daddy like Tom. Or she thinks that’s all she can get…
soooo sure she will lose weight, but does buff brides also fix busted faces and herpes all over your mouth? cause getting skinny isnt going to be enough to make her a beautiful bride.
I don’t believe Edna Bambrick is a real person. Anyone can put up a profile, I did that on myspace.com once. I bet he or she is digging all of the attention. As the lyrics go: “I’d rather laugh with then sinners, than cry with the saints”.
@62 edna reported me!!!! I’M A SOMEBODY
I doubt Edna is real.
But if she is, there is no way she can stand on the moral high ground because I personally saw her steal the food that the Red Cross was trying to send to the starving kids in Africa.
MOOOOOOO
this guy makes me thinks of a rednecke that one would have relooker with difficulty. He has a bottom of chick, a glance of sexsymbol of discotheque of countryside. And as much of charisma than a domestic iron…
http://bilybop.free.fr
This used to be a site where everyone posted comments on celebrities… that was fun, and that’s how it started. I posted that I didn’t hate Tom Cruise and I’m not a freak to wish someone dead that I don’t even know.
So, lets go back to just commenting on celebs and not on fellow posters behind the anonymity of a screen name. I don’t understand saying something personal about a screen name… it’s that dumbest thing in the whole world.
Just released photo of Sweatsens8tion!!!!
http://www.uglypeople.com/uploaded/6/ugly203.jpg
See, it really doesnt make a logical person out of a dumb one, now does it?
Now you see what I’m talking about, so take my advice and really try to act like a member of society and not like a bratty little annoying thing.
And, P.S. My Screen name is I_AM_BANANAS… like the letter I (eye)… and it’s not my fault you don’t know the difference. Ever heard the Gwen song? I am bananas b-a-n-a-n-a-s!
Don’t hate, appreciate.
it’s “this shit is bananas, b a n a n a s.” quit buying your cd’s at wal mart, and you’d know that. besides, commenting on the idiocy of a few fellow posters (repeat offenders, such as yourself), makes a slow newsweek go by a little faster. muah!
lamebananas, you need someone’s foot up your ass. Do you tell all your friends about a really cool blog that you’ve met so many ultra-cool people on? Funny thing is, you won’t tell them which blog, cuz they might find out what a loser you truly are if they read all these posts.
No, wait. Who am I kidding. You don’t have any friends…
Guys, it’s only 10:05 my time. Cool.
If Katie Holmes wanted to lose the weight from her pregnancy, wouldn’t the best idea be to RUN FOR HER LIFE? Guaranteed the weight will just fall off…
i didnt think tom cared what Katie/Kate looked like as long as Xenu was allowed to fuck him twice a week under the supervision of L. Ron Hubbard’s ashes! Cmon ppl get it straight.
# 105 Tanx for the tip.
I’ll give it a try – I hope it’s better than Bud Lite.
Tom looks like a retard in expensive sun shades and a nice jacket.
Tardy! Shut the fuck up!
I wish Nicole and Mimi would start dishing already. I’d love to hear some first hand stories.
I feel sorriest for his adopted kids. You know they’re just like “why couldn’t we have been adopted by some nice couple in a Sydney suburb??”