Katie Holmes is Addicted to E-Meters

January 20th, 2011 // 106 Comments

It’s always the children who suffer the most…

Sometimes there’s a story I know is completely bullshit – And even worse, comes from Star, so there’s no possible way it could be based in reality. – but I post it anyway in the hopes it will become true and make the world exactly as I envision it in my head. This is one of those times. Via Gossip Cop:

According to the weekly, Holmes is addicted to a Scientology treatment that has “an effect similar to heroin!”
The tabloid goes on to relate that Scientologists use a device called an “e-meter,” which “emits a low-level electric charge that goes to the brain.” And while Star acknowledges that the FDA says the device “serves no medical purpose,” the magazine still equates it with illegal drugs because the tab claims it “gives subjects a temporary feeling of euphoria, followed by a crash and a craving for more.”
Star then tenuously explains that the “e-meter” may “spark an endorphin release,” and when that occurs it’s the “same thing as taking morphine or other opiates, such as heroin or opium.”

If Katie Holmes isn’t walking around an empty mansion zapping herself into a happy place where Tom Cruise‘s beta-rays can’t reach her, then I don’t know how else you explain these pictures. Besides actual drugs and a systematic regime of psychological abuse engineered to induce a perpetual state of submission. That’s what they want you to think.

Photos: Flynet, Splash News


  1. That Guy

    Katie Holmes [on marrying Tom Cruise]: “When Top Gun came out my sisters were like, ‘Oh, my God, Top Gun! Tom Cruise!’ And I very confidently said, ‘I’m going to marry him one day.’ It wasn’t like, How do I get Tom Cruise? It was just: I think I’m going to marry him. Why not? He’ll like me. I’m fun.”

  2. Tom

    How does that even work … addicted to … holding things… what ?

  3. DOC


  4. GravyLeg

    This article is total bullshit.
    Everyone knows Tom Cruise uses Gay-ma Rays.

  5. Doc Scweinstrudel

    I’m bored of cheap and cheerful
    I want expensive sadness
    Hospital bills, parole
    Open doors to madness

    I want you to be crazy
    ‘Cause you’re boring baby when you’re straight
    I want you to be crazy
    ‘Cause you’re stupid baby when you’re sane

    I’m sick of social graces
    Show your shark-tipped teeth
    Lose your cool in public
    Dig that legal meet

    ‘Cause love is just a dialogue
    You can’t survive on ice-cream
    You got the same needs as a dog

    It’s alright (it’s alright)
    To be mean (to be mean)
    It’s alright (it’s alright)
    To be mean (to be mean)

    I want you to be crazy
    ‘Cause you’re boring baby when you’re straight
    I want you to be crazy
    ‘Cause you’re stupid baby when you’re sane

    It’s alright (it’s alright)
    To be mean (to be mean)

  6. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:


  7. Fumus

    Everyone in this room is now dumber after reading that story. I think I’ve seen more believable press in the ‘Weekly World News’

  8. Reggie Rhino

    Lame story,Fish, and it’s already been debunked by other sources. Endorphins are not like morphine or heroin. Your body produces endorphins when you do things like run or exercise.It is what produces a feeling of well-being after those activities. Check your facts before parroting bullshit like this E! story, it makes it easier to make biting or humorous comments about your subjects.

    • Doc Scweinstrudel

      you are ignoramous. exercise does produce endorphine, so are several other things, like love for example. AND such electromagnetic machines. They are available for sale and doctors do use them all over the world

      • Oh my god, this is amazing. I have never seen this. I almost wish to insult the site enough to deserve this honor! No jk… I don’t like being called names. :(

      • you mean reading? It’s like you are reading the comments of a crack head? unless you read my comments out loud to yourself. I’m saying home boy got dissed and it made me laugh, a lot. Quite confusing, I know.

      • Reggie Rhino

        And you are an idiot because the post was addressing the fact that endorphines aren’t heroin or morphine. I am well aware of the electromagnetic machines used by doctors. The point was the story overstated the effect of the machines by its’ comparison of their use two such powerful drugs.
        You should probably learn to read what is written instead of making up shit in your head before you write a response.

    • Aw, man, you got me good. If only I’d been more forthcoming and stated this story is complete bullshit in the very first paragraph. But, no, clearly I didn’t because Captain Facts here wouldn’t just comment on a post without reading it. That’s impossible!

      • GravyLeg


      • Hey I wanna be able to put a pic by my name too. :(
        AND a pink background. I demand these things, now.
        omg don’t delete me fish.

      • Sorry still laughing, I would feel so dumb right now skipping past the whole
        “Sometimes there’s a story I know is completely bullshit – And even worse, comes from Star, so there’s no possible way it could be based in reality. – but I post it anyway…” and screaming, THIS IS BULLSHIT!
        Lol it’s like God or Adam West straight saying “you are so dumb. freal”

      • seth rogen's vagina


      • Deacon Jones

        What the fuck are you even typing, MJ?

        I feel like I’m listening to a crack head

      • Hahaha that is funny.

      • Reggie Rhino

        OWWWWWW! Struck a nerve did I, Fish! If I did that I would be just like all of the mindless idiots who post bullshit without knowledge of the subject matter. Like the guys who are 32nd to post and write shit like “First” or “Fourth”. Sorry, you are offended by someone actually reading what you write before commenting on it! I am very sure that when people just comment it makes your day much easier because you can just type a bunch of random words without having to think about what you are writing. Have a great day!

  9. Doc Scweinstrudel

    My teacher of psychology used similar endorphine enducing machine which is supposed to help in depression…well everything is worth trying. In my opinion nothing works better for depression than omega 3, folic acid and vitamine D.

    • Or divorcing Tom. I think that would beat it.

      • Doc Scweinstrudel

        I think it looks like Suri is a little capricious bitch and wears her out a lot. She just looks exhausted.
        Tom? Why would she be tired of him, he is her teenage wet dream and his height is right for stand up cunnilingulus

      • GravyLeg

        Sure, he is right height…. She is just the wrong gender…

    • Deacon Jones

      Don’t forget masturbating.

    • Anonymous

      It would be okay if not for the psychological context surrounding emeter use. It’s not just about enducing euphoria/sense of well being – it’s about convincing people that they feel good because they’ve released the “charge” on something in their “reactive mind”.

      As you progress through Scientology you “discover” that these troubling things in your “reactive mind” include past lives and “incidents” relating to Xenu and the tortured souls of the aliens he enslaved. It’s a never ending line of “thetans” one has to “clear” through the auditing process (at a premium price).

      Yes – it’s addictive – and the emeter itself may be contributing.

      On a side note – look up the article about the emter on operation clambake. How the “opiate effect” is being described here is NOT technically correct. There’s a far more cogent argument for how it may be occuring on the OPERATION CLAMBAKE website.

  10. Lisa

    she needs to be addicted to the fact that a mother should brush and style her little girls hair AT LEAST once a week, let alone everyday

    • It was in braids,. I think she should do her OWN hair once a week :P

    • consider this

      Please understand that anything that is done repetitively with the same action, that includes music, (noise), smell, light or any other sense, can create euphoria in the brain the “same as morphine or herion”. It is addictive to the person, because they want to feel good, in order to feel good, they repeat the action. This is addiction. Any act to get away from “living’ stress and life that can be a ritual action, can be addictive to the brain, if it includes sight, smell, sound, and good feelings attached.

  11. It looks like she’s just had the life sucked right out of her.

  12. what an absolute waste of a good piece of ass…

  13. Putting on a Ricky Martin mask, strapping on a dildo and fucking Tom Cruise up the ass, day in, day out, would tire anyone out.

  14. wb

    I’d still hit that.

  15. Mortimer Duke

    Married to Tom Cruise, we all know there’s one thing she is not addicted to. Cock.

  16. clyde

    She really looks like someone sucked the life out of her.

  17. sixpack

    I know they say a picture is worth a thousand words and sure, we all take a bad photo….but look at that first pic. Wow. Talk about 110% miserable with your life at that very moment!

  18. Let me see if I can follow this.

    We have The Superficial repeating a story from Gossip Cop, which is reporting on a story from Star, which is making unreferenced claims that Katie Holms is addicted to E-meters, the function of which is described incorrectly, leading to criticism of whether endorphins are a drug or not.

    That’s the biggest steaming pile of shit I’ve read in a while. Even stripping out all the rest, E-meters are just a simple galvanic skin response meter…you might be familiar with the coin operated version at your local dive bar under the name “love tester”.

  19. Katie Holmes
    Tyler Perry
    Commented on this photo:


  20. She looks like a homeless person who has just kidnapped a child and told said child that if she cries, she’ll kill Santa Claus

  21. Vito

    “the magazine still equates it with illegal drugs because the tab claims it “gives subjects a temporary feeling of euphoria, followed by a crash…”

    Sort of like masturbation (and other sports), chocolate, a cup of java, eating good chow, a hot shower, a good movie, etc…

    Man, them magazinies be some stupid peoples!

  22. Mr Obvious

    If e-meters have the same effect of heroin, then most of Hollywood would be using it. And the Mexican cartel would have e-meter houses and there would be an illegal trade in e-meters.

  23. moo

    poor kid…she looks miserable

  24. Marceelf

    I wish Katie Holmes was addicted to chaining herself in the basement. Judging from her pasty skin, it’s a real possibility.

  25. Rancid

    That look on the face says it all: “I haven’t had any dick for YEARS”

  26. She just looks so unhappy

  27. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    The kid isn’t sad, she’s just texting on her iphone cause “mommy made me leave the ipad at home”…bitch

  28. RoboZombie

    FUCK $cientology!
    And yes, it IS worse than other religions so don’t even start.

    • Why do you think it’s worse? I’m not going to defend scientology, but they seem to be fairly harmless morons, where Christianity, Islam, and Judaism is shit I’m afraid to turn my back on.

      • Cock Dr

        I understand that Scientology is basically a money/tax scam for those at the top of the organization. It’s a “religion” that makes you pay & pay & pay & pay.
        Can’t help but wonder if this perfectly demented story somehow gets legs and results in quite a few loser types coming into Scientology places of business thinking they’ll catch a buzz on the bullshit cash machines.

      • Ed

        Scientology is worse because they took Chef from us.

      • Anonymous

        I can leave a church, mosque or temple of any of any mainstream denomination and not be harrassed and/or disconnected from my friends and family still in.

        I can disagree with people in these religions (and have) and still be welcome. I can even speak out publically against the whole religion and not worry about being tailed by PI’s or having so-called “confidential” auditing files given to media outlets I may have spoken to.

        I don’t HAVE to pay a cent to attend church. Donations are optional as are the ammounts. I won’t be harassed to pay more or told my eternity depends on me paying thousands of dollars for auditing and courses.

        I can read the bible, koran, etc, and not get slapped with a copyright notice and threats of legal action.

        These religions are UP FRONT about what they believe. There is no “bait and switch” with one set of tennents for the unintiated and another for those who’ve paid to get up to the highest levels.

        I don’t have to stop taking my anti-depressants to be a christian, jew or muslim. Nor do I have to take mega doses of vitamins, risking liver and kidney damage.

        So…what were you saying about all Scientology being harmless?

  29. Reg

    Tom Cruise likes to hook the E-meter up to his balls.

  30. piperfromweho

    Suri looks like the girl from The Ring! I CAN’T STOP HURTING PEOPLE.

  31. Steve - Toronto

    Wow, they look SO happy!

  32. Satan's bitch

    She looks like a whipped pup. All the time. And the wardrobe, how very ARC.

  33. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    Maybe Tom should’ve spent the extra money on the metal hand cuffs. Leather is too easy to escape from.

  34. Jen

    “I knew I should have stuck with Pacey Whitter. I wonder if he will leave that snooty blonde bitch for me?”

  35. burton

    all that money and she dresses worse than a welfare queen…at least they try.

  36. Lux

    “The FDA says the device “serves no medical purpose,” the magazine still equates it with illegal drugs because the tab claims it “gives subjects a temporary feeling of euphoria, followed by a crash and a craving for more.””

    You’ve also just described Chik Fil A.

  37. CassandraNoelle

    She used to be such a vibrant, bubbly, beautiful young woman with such light, and LIFE in her eyes. Now, it’s like she’s lost her entire personality, life everything…it’s so sad. Tom really fucked with her big time. It just breaks my heart, it really does. And some of you need to learn how to have more compassion for people, and stop being such evil-ass douchebags…it’s really not cute to get a cheap laugh off of someone else’s very real pain..

    • That wasn’t Tom or Scientology that did this, just kids. Look around.

      • CassandraNoelle

        Kids?!? She has one child! I have 3, and I’m always smiling to the point where everyone is always asking me what the fuck I am so happy about, so please…it’s not her child that has made her like this, it’s called living a lie, and just being plain miserable!

      • Cassandra, let’s be honest. You’re a sad empty hulk of your previously thinner self. That’s quite possibly why people are so confused as to what you have to be so happy about.

        Allow me also to stress I am in no way getting a cheap laugh at your pain in this matter. I’m just here to help.

        Keep your chin up, baby.

      • Mortimer Duke

        You mean chins.

      • CassandraNoelle

        Umm, how exactly is 5’2, 115 ilbs fat? Don’t worry……I’ll wait:)

      • CassandraNoelle

        It’s amazing how people can sit behind a computer screen, attempt to talk shit about people they don’t know, or rather have NEVER EVEN SEEN, just to make themselves feel important. It’s quite pathetic really…and I pity you sweetie, I really, really do!

      • 5’2″? Aw Mama Cass, you’re short too? Now I just feel bad. Forget I said anything. I don’t want to pick on you.

        I didn’t get through that last post of yours, but from what I can tell you think something I did was amazing? Thank you! Such a sweetheart.

        I gotta’ be honest though, you don’t really seem like the self-described happy smiley gal that your friends seem to accuse you of being. You’re kind of angry, really the opposite of jolly. I guess that smashes another stereotype.

      • the only opinion that matters

        The difference is, you get to raise your 3 kids the way you want to. Katie was raised in a seemingly normal family, and since she married that whackjob Tom Cruise she has to live her life by a whole new crazy assed set of rules. They do not discipline their child, no one is allowed to. Suri is allowed to make all her own decisions and there is not much doubt in my mind that she will grow up to be a strange woman with few friends outside of their cult. Come on Katie, grow a pair and leave this weird life you are living. You won’t lose custody of your child, you are a good mom. DO IT DO IT DO IT! Join my church, the Church of Using Your Fucking Brain and Getting the Hell Out. It’s free and you’ll feel much better!

  38. e-meter, it’s the new heroin.

  39. Tom

    Well, that would explain why she walks around like a zombie.

  40. Jon and Kate plus Hate

    This girl ain’t got nothing a good cock wouldn’t cure. Remember when she looked her best was in that movie where they fished her dead naked body out of that swamp. I’d southern comfort her ass….ppeeeeshaaawww

  41. Xenu

    Ahhh i see ol’ Katie is enjoying my galactic anal probe technology….hmmm……it’ good for you :)

  42. uncle bill

    this is the confirmationof the SCIENTOLOGY MOVEMENT.
    ………………JUST BULLSH*T & CR*P!!

  43. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    Why doesn’t Pacey rescue her already?! He’s a lot taller than TC or Suri, so he should be able to get past them. Yeah, he’ll have to de-program her, but that’s a fine lookin’ lady (see pics 7 & 8)!

    P.S. Does her “S” necklace in pic #4 stand for “Scientology” or “Shoes”?

  44. Bill Clinton

    Katie would be better off if she were addicted to Heroin. Scientology is so destructive.

    Free Katie!

  45. Katie Holmes
    I'm on my Period.
    Commented on this photo:

    Why isn’t this joke of a religion outlawed? I mean I’d love to see all religions outlawed, but this one especially.

  46. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    His body language is yelling “now get back out there bitch and look after my children”.

  47. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks a lot like a teenage boy in these pics. Which suits Tom Cruise just fine I guess….

  48. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    She does look radiant, doesn’t she? Why exactly does she go shopping and throw Tom’s money away? She always looks like a washed up homeless crack addict. ( my apologies to crack addicts)

  49. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    In every one of these pictures, she looks like she is suffering from severe clinical depression. She is naturally beautiful, but her baggy clothes, messy hair and bare face make it look like just getting out of bed in the morning is a major challenge, with no energy left for grooming. And of course her vacant stare makes her look terribly unhappy.

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